Dreamer's Mist
by BurningDecks
Summary: Sometimes the past can catch up with you, for Daryl that time is today. Set in the prison, Daryl is struggling to keep his past bottled up so it's up to Carol to relieve his pain and prove to him, he is worth the world. Daryl&Carol. Angst. Romance. Slight AU
1. Chapter 1

Carol silently opened her eyes as she lay on the top bunk of the cell she shared with Lori, the place was quiet but something didn't feel quite right. It wasn't in the sense of the group were in impending danger from Walkers or any rogue survivors but she felt strangely uncomfortable.

And it wasn't the kind of discomfort she felt usually, nobody could ever feel happy living in a prison where murderers, rapists and other disgusting individuals who then became flesh-eating freaks were caged. She wasn't happy about having to sleep in a bed where these monsters lived but she much preferred a secure prison to trying their luck out there, in a tent, in the cold.

The prison was stuffy and the cells were claustrophobic, she had often found herself sat up late into the night just listening to the noises the creaky old prison made, the sound of Walker's roaming in the yard. But tonight was a particularly difficult night, it took quite some time for her to finally fall asleep and she kept periodically waking up, something was bothering her and she couldn't quite work it out.

Carol sat up on the bed and looked around the cell in the darkness. Very little light passed into these cells at night, the lights were no longer functioning so they had used their torches to light up the darkness. She moved on the bed and let her legs dangle over the edge, she gently rolled her shoulder again, the ache that Daryl had massaged away had returned. Daryl. What even was that?

Daryl had changed recently, whether he had meant to or not. She noticed it when Sophia had first gone missing that night she cried herself to sleep in the RV, he got up in the pitch dark to go and look for her daughter, he almost seemed to care.

He had tried to reassure Carol that they would find her missing daughter and even bought her back a flower, a Cherokee Rose. He told her the story, he showed her where the Roses grew in a way of apologising for calling her an unspeakable name.

When they found Sophia in that barn and she fell to the floor, Daryl held the woman to save her from herself, to save her from her hungry daughter. Even after Sophia had been... put down, he held her until she pushed him away.

When Hershel's farm had been over run by Walker's he waited on the road for her, he rescued her and whisked her away.

But recently it had been different, Daryl had been different. Carol had taken some food down to the overturned bus where he patrolling because she knew by the end of the night, there would have been nothing left for him. Daryl was more grouchy than usual if he didn't eat. She heard him mumble something that sounded like 'caviar' as he took a slice of meat and chewed on it, she didn't expect Daryl to take note of her shoulder pain and Carol most definitely didn't expect the man to massage her back and shoulder.

She was so used to Daryl being hostile and aggressive that this new side of him took her by surprise. Now the man was no longer leaving in the shadow of his racist, sexually orientated, insane older brother he had begun to come out of his shell. God, his hands were so incredibly talented, his skin had been toughened by all the work and his fine motor skills meant he was well suited for the task. Carol felt so wonderfully relaxed for the first time in months, that man's hands worked brilliantly and he seemed to realise that too. Which is why he changed the subject and decided they should go back to the rest of the group, he must have felt a little awkward but Carol knew how to fix that, flirt outrageously by making sex jokes.

She smiled in the darkness remembering how Daryl had choked for a moment and then he laughed accidentally making a sexual remark that Carol picked up on. He groaned and demanded she stopped in case somebody heard them, Carol had to laugh at how awkward he was. He was like a school boy at that moment, he was all talk but as soon as it came to action he'd clam up and change the subject. Even if it was a joke.

After that moment they hadn't really spoke to each other, as they passed each other they smiled but didn't speak.

"Carol...?" He heard Lori very quietly whisper. "...There's something wrong with one of the others, I can hear them... crying." Maybe that was what had woken Carol up, the sound of someone crying. If it had woken them both up there was a good chance the rest of the group had been woken up too, slowly and carefully Carol lowered herself down off the bed and reached for her torch then turned to Lori, Carol held out a hand to help the pregnant woman onto her feet as she used her free hand to hold the top bunk and pull herself up. Carol kept hold of Lori's hand and slowly wandered out of their room out to the balcony.

Outside on the balcony was Glenn and Maggie, Maggie looked absolutely exhausted as she stood wrapped in Glenn's arms, her head lying against his shoulder. She was tightly clutching the back of his t-shirt in her fists as she stared out on to the perch where Rick was knelt with T-Dog. Poor Maggie looked shattered and so much older than she really was, maybe that was because of the dark or the fact that she lived in a world filled with flesh-eating monsters that had taken a chunk from her father's leg, perhaps the amount of pressure caused by this kind of environment had finally got to her.

Glenn looked just as exhausted as his girlfriend, he scrubbed his eyes with one hand before putting it back around her shoulders as he gently kissed her forehead. He had discarded his cap in the cell he was sharing with Maggie at some point and had spent the night trying to comfort her, he had also been completely focused on the perch until he heard the two women step out from their cells.

He weakly smiled wanting nothing more than to just go back to bed and curl up with his girlfriend, to sleep until the morning so he could feel refreshed and not as low as they were all feeling at the moment. When Carol looked over the balcony to the cells below he spotted Carl lingering in the doorway looking tired and disheveled as well as Beth next to him, Carl seemed to have taken a shine to Beth in the recent weeks, whether his interests were reciprocated she didn't know but it was nice to see.

Carol looked around at everyone again, there was one person missing besides Hershel who for obvious reasons couldn't get out of bed. Lori, Maggie, Glenn, Rick, T-Dog, Carl, Beth, Hershel, so where was Daryl? And who was crying? From what she could see nobody who was stood looking was making the noise. "Glenn, w-where's Daryl?" She asked hearing the muffled cries again.

Glenn's eyes met Carol's and he seemed disheartened, gloomy even. He bit his bottom lip in a moment's hesitation before lifting his hand and pointing over to where Rick and T-Dog were knelt on the perch, something in Carol at that moment changed and she felt incredibly sick. Her palms felt clammy, thoughts were rushing through her mind at a million miles per second as her heart raced uncontrollably. She dropped Lori's hand and very slowly stepped away from the door of their cell holding the torch out in front of her, at an agonizingly slow pace she walked towards the two men knelt on the perch. As she got closer to them she could see the bed spread Daryl had been using to sleep on at their feet.

Carol couldn't bring herself to look over Rick's shoulder, she wasn't sure if she was going to like what she saw. Had Daryl been bitten or scratched at some point? Was he turning. She continued to look at Rick's feet unsure of what to do with herself, when she heard an awful choked sob coming from one of the three men. It made her heart-break, she could feel the pain, the agony just pouring off in waves and it made tears spring to her eyes.

"I-Is he hurt?" She whispered making Rick and T-Dog both snap their heads in her direction in surprise. Carol had prepared herself for the worst, to hear Rick say yes and that they'd have to end Daryl's life before the disease captured him.

"No." Rick said calmly. "I think... I think he's having a nightmare, we can't wake him up." She had not prepared herself for that, to hear that he was fine. He was well. The relief that suddenly flooded her veins was incredible, to hear that he was okay.

Carol nodded as T-Dog moved aside to let her take his place, the scene laid out before her was devastating. There lay the strongest, toughest, bravest man she knew whimpering and sobbing as he slept. He probably didn't even know he was doing it. Daryl had his fingers laced into his hair and was pulling on it until his knuckles were white with the pressure and with his other hand he clutched the poncho he'd been wearing a lot lately, he'd obviously grabbed it as he was thrashing around and had yet to release it. Daryl's jaw was clenched tight and his eyes jammed shut as he frowned, but even with his eyes closed, hot tears streaked his face. Carol didn't exactly know what to do, or how to make anything better so she turned to the leader of their group.

"I think you should probably both leave before he wakes up, he won't like you seeing him like this." She paused and looked back at Daryl as he cried out in obvious emotional pain, it made her want to lie down beside him and cry too. How could someone who was always so strong, so fearless become so... wrecked. Rick and T-Dog nodded patting Carol's shoulder as they both stood up and walked back to the cell's, Rick dismissed everyone who was looking out and sent them back to bed. For a moment Carol just sat and watched Daryl, every so often he would dig his heels into his bed roll as if he was trying to push something away and his hands clenched in his hair so tightly to the point it looked like it actually hurt. "Daryl?" Carol whispered hoping he would wake up but he only threw his head side-to-side. She sighed as she reached down and attempted to peel his hand from his hair, his fists were locked so tight she didn't think she would ever be able to help him.

Carol very carefully held his hand in hers and placed it in her lap, she allowed her free hand to rest against his cheek and used her thumb to gently wipe away the hot streams that trailed down his face. "Come on Daryl..." She sighed a little uncomfortably. "Daryl!" Carol gently squeezed his hand trying to help him wake up. But he just whimpered. "Wake up Daryl, come on please get up."

He stopped moving, his body seemed to relax as he lay there, his hand flexed in hers as she held him. His frown relaxed and the hand clenched around his poncho pulled away and tucked under his head. Daryl grumbled a little, he pulled his hand out of Carol's and wiped his face. He was no longer asleep but he couldn't bring himself to open his eyes.

"Are you okay?" Carol whispered placing her hands in her lap, he shrugged in reply, it was obvious by his tight jaw he was embarrassed and angry at himself. A Dixon does not cry, if Merle could see him now he would ridicule him and then probably beat the shit out of him. "Where you... having a nightmare?" She asked gently, not really knowing if he was going to be honest with her or shut her down in his typical aggressive manner.

Daryl opened his eyes letting Carol see them burn with an intensity that she had never seen before, it wasn't the same kind of anger he felt when they lost Merle or when he had called Carol a stupid bitch in Hershel's barn, it was a deep fury that he had buried in his past and only came out during times of real pain. Without answering her question he slowly sat up moving so his knees were bent and he could rest his arms against them.

"You know you can talk to me, don't you Daryl?" Carol shuffled so she could reflect the redneck's position and face him.

He grunted quietly as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Ain't got nothin' to say." Carol had expected that to come out a little harsher than it did, either Daryl was so exhausted and emotionally drained he couldn't even attempt to be mad or he hadn't intended to get mad at all. Carol and Daryl were now becoming quite close friends, and with that friendship came a change in Daryl's emotional barriers. He was smiling a lot more than usual, he didn't swear as often as he did when they first met and he very rarely used racial slurs to address Glenn. Those slurs were never aggressively aimed at Glenn but they sometimes seemed harsh and got to him, all it took was a quiet word from Carol to make it better.

Carol was glad to see the change in the man, she would never force somebody to change but the change was beautiful, she adored the way he smiled and the way they could flirt like crazy now unlike before. She wanted him to keep changing.

"You don't have to be strong all the time." She said locking their gaze, he had the most divine eyes. They were shades lighter than any she had ever seen before, if ice and steel could be smashed together to make a silvery-blue colour then that was how she would describe them. They were stunning but at the same time harsh and calculating, they were the windows to his contused and damaged soul. Carol watched Daryl bring his thumb to his mouth, he curled his fingers under his chin and began chewing and biting on the nail relentlessly. He'd be lucky if he had a nail left by the end of the night.

He scoffed at what she said, he always had to be strong especially now the rest of the group seemed to be losing their minds. Rick had killed his best friend for the group and was no longer talking to his heavily pregnant wife, Carl wouldn't talk to his mother. Glenn hadn't been the same since Dale had died, Maggie and Beth were pretty on edge since Hershel lost his leg so it was just him holding himself together. Carol has lost her daughter, she seemed pretty well but he wasn't exactly great at reading people so he didn't know if she was suffering or not. "I-I don't wanna' talk 'bout it."

Carol was surprised to hear Daryl's voice shaking, Daryl seemed surprised by it too and didn't know how to react so he stood himself up. His hand never left his mouth even as he got up and it made him look like a child, he seemed lost and almost afraid.

Carol stayed sat on the floor as he paced around the perch, if she was lower than him he wouldn't feel intimidated, it wasn't very often Daryl felt intimidated by someone else usually he would be the one scaring others but tonight was different. Whatever he had dreamed about had really rattled his cage, she had never seen the man even close to tears before much less actually crying.

She sighed and rubbed her eyes. "You just want to let this keep bothering you until you crack?" She replied making him turn so their eyes could meet. He was in turmoil. "I don't want you to end up losing your mind, like Shane!"

That ignited a fury in Daryl, he stormed over to where Carol was sat, knelt in front of her and glared into her eyes. "I'll never be like him. Do you fuckin' understand me?" He spat the words out fiercely, he hadn't spoken to her in that tone of voice in quite some time. Carol barely flinched as he got up close to her, even in his anger she found her heart racing, he smelt delicious. He had used the shower gel she had found in one of the houses they stopped in, originally the idea of giving it to him was a little scary she felt he would laugh or say she was ridiculous for even getting it but when she heard him grumble about losing the last of his soap, she called him into her cell while Lori was elsewhere and handed it to him. He had actually smiled and thanked her only making one joke about smelling like a fairy.

She didn't think he smelled like 'a fairy' she didn't exactly have a lot of choice when it came to grabbing the gel, so what ever fragrance it had he just had to deal with. Cucumber and mint, it wasn't every day a rough and tumble redneck would reek of those two substances, usually it was moonshine whiskey and diesel. But it was good. Real good.

Daryl steadily glared at Carol for a little while longer before he began to waver, he was thinking about it again. Slowly Carol lifted her hand to his face wiping away the remainder of the tears left on his face, as their skin made contact he sprang backwards on to his feet again.

"Talk to me Daryl."

He groaned in defeat and ran a hand through his hair again displaying his frustration. "You're not gonna give up are ya?" He asked quietly. Carol shook her head silently and watched him shift his weight from foot to foot, he was considering opening up, he knew he was never going to get away from her if he didn't tell her how he was feeling.

Carol quirked an eyebrow in surprise and confusion when Daryl began shrugging off his leather jacket and unbuttoning the shirt he wore underneath, he dropped them on his bed roll before dragging his thumb back to his mouth and slowly turning his back to her. Everything was silent besides the light snoring of one of the group and the sound of Daryl's nail snapping under his teeth. She considered asking him what he was doing when something in her mind clicked, she slowly reached down and picked up her torch. Carol rolled the torch in her hand before beaming the light at the man. What she saw made her heartbreak.

Carol quietly climbed to her feet and slowly walked towards him, she didn't want to move too fast and spook him. It looked like agony.

"Daryl..." She whispered feeling distraught. His back was crisscrossed in pink and white scars that varied in thickness, length and their depth, there were more small circular scars on his back than she could count. It was painful to look at and must have been painful to bear, emotionally and physically.

Countless times Carol has seen Daryl get up in the morning and he seemed stiff and hurting, if he bent down to pick something up first thing he'd grit his teeth and she could almost feel how hurt he was, the stiff pain only seemed to last for a few minutes every day before they were gone. Either it stopped after those few minutes or he was in constant pain and he just ignored it.

"How... how did this happen?" She said lifting her hands to run her fingers across one of the deepest scars running diagonally through the meat of his back, over his spine. His entire body tensed for a few seconds before relaxing again, she heard him let out a deep sigh and his head fell against the cold prison wall, the temperature of Carol's cold hands seemed to be relieving some of his pain. She could feel him rocking backwards and forwards ever so slightly, he seemed to be in more pain than he'd ever let on. "Does that floor make the pain better or worse?" Carol asked gently placing her hands on his shoulder blades and lightly rubbing circles into his skin.

"Worse. But 'm not sleepin' in a cage." He replied through grit teeth, Carol didn't stop doing the same thing he had down for her before, she returned the favor in the form of a back and shoulder massage. If that was what he needed then that was what he was going to get.

Carol tried to be as gentle as possible as she tried to held him but she found with him stood up, he would arch away if she touched a particularly painful spot, she knew it wasn't really his fault but if she was going to help him relax she needed to keep him still. "Stay here, I've got an idea." Daryl grunted and looked over his shoulder at her as she walked away, she headed into one of the empty cells and grabbed one of the flimsy but better-than-sleeping-on-the-floor mattresses of the bunk and dragged it out to where Daryl slept every night, she then went back to the cell and grabbed the second mattress from the top bunk and dropped it next to the first. Carol pushed the two together to act as a double mattress and then turned to all of his things and placed them on his bed roll. Carol looked at her handy work and smiled before looking over at Daryl who had been watching her the whole time and nodded for him to come over and lie down.

He didn't waste anytime making his way over to his new makeshift bed, why hadn't he thought of doing that before? It probably would have prevented his pain and nobody would've been any wiser of his condition. But that didn't matter now, Carol knew what was causing him so much pain, the rest of the group knew something had driven him to tears while he was sleeping so there was no escaping it.

Daryl carefully lay himself down on one of the mattresses and sighed feeling how soft it was, he had missed sleeping in a proper bed, not that he ever really slept in a bed before any of this. Sometimes Merle would be so high he wouldn't want to risk even being in the house when he came in, so he'd drive a little down the road and sleep inside his truck where it was a little safer.

He suddenly snapped from his thoughts when Carol placed her hands on his back again, lightly running her fingers against the damaged surface. Daryl closed his eyes feeling a little peaceful but at the same time bracing himself for the pain as she systematically worked to get rid of his pain.

She started at his neck, he didn't feel any pain there but he wasn't going to complain and just allowed Carol to rub circles against his neck with her thumbs, she giggled a little when he let out a moan. "Enjoying yourself?" Daryl grunted a reply and cracked an eye open slightly to look at the woman as he pulled his hand away from his mouth. "You're not gonna have any thumb left if you keep chewing on it like that." He grumbled something Carol didn't quite catch and placed his hands under his head to refrain from biting them. "You gonna tell me how you got these?" She asked sliding her hands down to the man's shoulders. He had strong shoulders, it felt great to be able to run her hands over them, to touch his skin.

"I was a shit son." He said bluntly rolling his shoulders a little to direct Carol's hands.

Carol didn't have a reply for that so she just kept working, digging her fingertips into the blades of his shoulder to try and help. Never in her life had she heard someone admit to being physically abused as a child like that, to hear him blame himself for the way he was treated by his father. Conversation ran dry for a while after that Carol wanted to ask through a morbid form of curiosity the kind of things his father had done to him, but she knew that was too far, he had enough trouble being honest and opening up as it was.

But Daryl knew. He just... knew. "Can hear yer mind goin', somethin' you wanna say?"

Carol felt a little guilty and unhappy asking Daryl about his suffering but it seemed he was willing to share, she slid her hands from his shoulders a little further down his back before saying anything. "What did he-" She was cut off by Daryl groaning in a mixture of pain and pleasure. "-What did he do to you?"

He was silent for a moment as if he was thinking about what to say, or choosing his best stories. "Since when he started smokin' I dunno, but he used ma back to put 'em out." The words came out whispered and strained but nonetheless they came out. "Liked the belt. Smashed ma arm wit' a piece a wood once, forced me t' drink 12 bottles of beer, one after the other when I wer' 9. Punched me in the head when I wer' sick." Carol could see Daryl was sparing her all the grizzly details, she was surprised she hadn't seen the scars before but then she remember that when she took Daryl's supper to him on Hershel's farm the day he was hurt, he had pulled the bed sheets up to cover his body. She thought he must've just been feeling a little vulnerable at the time but obviously not.

Carol sighed sadly and listened as Daryl listed more and more cruel, torturous things his father did to him or made him do to himself and suddenly she completely understood why he behaved the way he did. Daryl was cruel, rude and unbelievably harsh because he was protecting himself. He didn't want to get hurt again by someone he cared about, all love for his father eventually faded and he didn't want to be put through that kind of emotional pain again, he didn't want to be rejected again.

Daryl kept listing these agonising tortures until Carol reached his lower back, just above his waistband. As she ground her fingers into his tainted skin he cried out in pain, turning his face into the mattress so he didn't make too much noise. Carol didn't spend too long on that particular spot, she couldn't bear to hear him in anymore pain so she shuffled aside a little so he could roll over and face her.

"Don't cry." He whispered reaching up and wiping away a stray tear from her cheek. "It's not always bad, can cope most the time." Daryl seemed a little more at ease then he had before, some of his pain must have been lifted making him feel comfortable. He looked sleepy all of a sudden, like he was just going to nod off at any moment, the man was suddenly sluggish and exhausted.

Carol nodded, there were flashes of times where Ed had shown new levels of violence to her especially before the end of the world but he had never treated her the way Daryl had been treated. "I'm sorry, I was just thinking about Ed and how I used to think I had it hard."

Daryl shook his head. "Ya did 'ave it 'ard, I wer' just a kid, it made me tough. You wer' a woman, can't get tough when yer grown." That made a little sense to her but at the same time it seemed like a childish belief that Daryl carried with him all his life, it helped him when times were rough, if he was hurting then it was going to make him stronger. He kept his eye focused on Carol as she wiped away her tears and smiled at him, he automatically smiled back without even thinking about it. "Sorry, I woke ya up."

Carol shook her head and used her fingertips to brush the longer strands of his hair from his eyes, his closed his eyes at the contact to hide his embarrassment, her spontaneous displays of affection spooked him sometimes but he was getting used it. She was gentle and loving and he had never been exposed to that kind of behaviour. "It's alright, but you should have told somebody, I could've helped you before. Now everybody knows there's something up."

Daryl sighed and opened his eyes again focusing in one Carol's as her fingers slid down to the side of his face, she kept trailing her fingers up and down his skin. It was comforting and peaceful. "They can think wha' they want." He said a little roughly spitting out the words.

She found herself laughing at him again, it was almost as funny his 'little Shane' comment. His anger melted away again making him smile.

"Think you should probably get some sleep, no doubt Rick'll have you running around tomorrow." Carol said pulling her hand away as she leaned down and kissed his temple. Daryl nodded already missing the warmth of her skin. Carol slowly stood up and watched Daryl cover himself up with a bed sheet, within seconds his eyes began to feel heavy and the man was close to sleep. "See ya tomorrow."


	2. Chapter 2

Carol woke up to the sound of people working around her in the cell block, she could hear Rick's voice as he spoke in a hushed voice to his son, she couldn't exactly hear what they were saying but it didn't matter. She was exhausted, she didn't realise how late it was and how long her and Daryl had been up until she saw the sky change colours.

T-Dog's loud laughed boomed out while he was mid conversation with somebody else, it was nice to actually hear people laughing instead of the awkward horrific silence that always seemed to overcome their group. Carol had no idea who he was talking to or what they were talking about either but that was also irrelevant because the voice she was looking for, she couldn't hear. It might as well have been silent in the entire block without his thick and strong voice.

Carol slowly slid herself off her bunk for the second time that morning and glanced at where Lori usually slept at night. She had already left the cell and had probably gone with Beth and Maggie to take a shower, if they had gone to the shower block she wished they had taken her with them. Even though the water was cold she still enjoyed the feeling of taking a shower, it helped resume normality. Kinda.

For a moment she stood just fishing through her bag looking for a clean set of clothes when she heard Rick yell her name. She walked out of the cell and looked over the edge of the balcony, the man stood with his hands on his hips staring back up at her, without a single word he nodded his head over to the perch. Carol nodded before heading back into the cell so she could get dressed.

Upon dressing herself she left the cell and made her way over to the perch where Daryl was stood sharpening his bolts over the balcony, he didn't look up when she approached him, he just waved a bolt in the rough direction of his bed where a half full bowl of some tinned crap sat. It wasn't her idea of a decent and appetising breakfast but she didn't have the choice on what she ate, she was just happy Daryl had returned the favour and saved her some food. "Thank you, what exactly am I eating?" She asked hoping to spur his voice but he merely shrugged and carried on sharpening his tools. "Don't feel like talking today?"

Daryl looked back at the woman stood beside his bed as she slowly ate, he refused to allow eyes to meet Carol's when he glanced at her. "Rick knows, 'bout the scars." She nodded silently watching him turn away again and look down at the group's leader as he spoke with Glenn. "Think's I can't do nothin' no more. Ain't no fuckin' cripple." He spat angrily like how Rick felt was some how to be spiteful.

Carol carefully put the bowl down beside Daryl's bed and walked towards him so she could lean against the railings too. "He's just worried about you, he doesn't want you to over work yourself and get hurt." Daryl glared at her, it was like she was verbally insulting him, it was like she too was saying he was incapable of looking after himself. He had spent all these years taking care of himself why would he stop now? Why did these people all of a sudden think Daryl couldn't take care of himself, he had taken care of himself since he was 7 years old, protected himself. Cleaned himself up after getting battered by his father or his brother, fed himself because nobody else would do it.

But all of a sudden just because he had a couple of dodgy scars that cause him trouble, he wasn't able to do all of these things anymore. God, he was pissed. He couldn't decide if the anger he now felt was because he saw the pity in Rick's eyes when he finally admitted what had driven to nightmares, how Rick had asked if he was well enough to actually work. Or if his anger spawned from the fear of people knowing his past, knowing that his scars and his past had a massive effect on his current situation.

Daryl threw the bolt he was working on back down on the pile he had built up beside him, Carol looked at it and wondered how long he had been up making those. "Daryl?" Rick called to him as he stood by the cell block door his silenced pistol in his hand. "Gotta go get some more water."

He grunted in reply grabbing his ammunition in silence, he set his eyes on Carol again and felt a little bad for getting so riled up so as he walked away, he gently patted her arm and descended the stairs to meet up with Rick. He didn't want to leave Carol thinking he was mad at her, she had done a lot for him recently and he didn't want her to think he was ungrateful.

Carol watched the redneck's back as he walked away, picking up his crossbow from beside the wall and loading it. "Let's go get these assholes." Rick said checking his pistol was loaded before heading out the door with the other man, loaded crossbow in tow. Even though the way to the cafeteria was now clear, they still didn't want to risk going anywhere alone, at least if everybody went in pairs they'd could look out for each other. Watch each other's backs. Backs. God, the state of Daryl's back was horrific.

She knew at the time she had to say as little as possible about it and show no pity, but Carol felt awful knowing as that a child Daryl had suffered extensive pain at the hands of his father and even now as a fully grown man, he was still caught under his father's evil shadow. He had been scarred for life, mentally, physically and emotionally. Carol couldn't let Daryl know how much she wanted to scoop him up in her arms as if he were a baby and make it better, she wanted to go back in time and stop all of that happening to him.

She wished he hadn't kept everything a secret for such a long time, even if he hadn't told her about the scars she wished he had let her know how much pain he was in constantly, then they could've got him something to help him cope. Nobody else would've had to know, nobody would have been woken up by his crying. Daryl had actually cried. He didn't tell Carol what the dream had been about but she figured the pain had triggered a memory from his childhood and that was where he was, it was not in fact Daryl crying, but the child trapped inside of him. He was crying out for somebody to save him, he was begging someone to rescue him.

Carol sighed and began moving from where Daryl had left her, he had trusted her with his biggest secret, did that mean she was going to be the one to save him? Was she going to have the strength and the courage to save him? This was definitely a big ask of anybody, although he had not physically told Carol he wanted her help she knew he needed it, but making Daryl face his demons is easier said that done.

He was going to dig his heels in and refuse, his fuse was probably going to become shorter and shorter every time they spoke about it, the man was going to come close to an emotional breakdown before anything would get better. Daryl Dixon was not a man who 'did' emotions or emotional breakdowns, he was going to get angry and a lot of people were going to be in the firing line. Carol slowly moved from the perch and down to the cell where Hershel was sleeping, the man looked rough, but that was ten times better than he had looked the day before.

Because Hershel was incapable of movement and taking care of illness or injury at the moment Carol had almost taken over his role, she didn't know even a portion of what he knew or what he could do, but at the time she was all the group had.

Carol had sat with Hershel for about an hour, redressing what was left of his leg and for the few minutes he was awake engaging him in conversation, she tested his wits to make sure he didn't lose his mind or become delirious. He seemed well enough mentally but he was just exhausted, so Carol let him sleep. As she stood from the side of his bed she heard the door to the cell block open again, it clattered heavily and was followed by the sound of running, that could only mean one thing. Rick and Daryl were being chased by Walkers.

She darted to the cell door not really knowing what she'd be able to do with no weapon but was taken by surprise when she saw Rick stood in the middle of the floor placing the now full canteens against the wall, Lori who had returned from her adventure with the other two girls slid the block's door closed again and allowed Carl to lock it. There were no signs of Walkers or any trouble with the prisoners in the other cell block, so why had they been running? Where was Daryl? As Carol called out to Rick his face fell grave, something terrible had happened making tears spring to her eyes, where was he?

Rick looked to his wife and son who both seemed to get the idea and moved away to their respective cells so Rick and Carol could talk, Rick's hand rested on Carol's shoulder making her fear the worst. Daryl had been bitten and Rick had to put him down, he'd been scratched and sacrificed himself to save Rick's life.

"Carol, he's okay." Rick said sensing Carol's pain, she sighed in relief and stared up at the ceiling for a moment trying to regain control over her emotions, she had to stop thinking the worst, this was Daryl she was talking about. He wouldn't allow himself to get bitten, no Walker would be stupid enough to try to take on such an aggressive fear inspiring man. Whether they were brain-dead or not, those Walkers knew better. "Well, he didn't get bit, but he's not okay." The man said pausing only when Carol snapped her head back down to look at him. "We were joking and he shoved me, I went to shove him back and he flipped. It was like he thought I was going to hit him, like, really hit him."

Carol knew what he was getting out and sighed, rubbing her face and looking up at the perch where she assumed Daryl was hiding. But when she heard the crashing and clattering she figured he was probably be in one of the empty cells, destroying it. "Alright, I'll talk to him. But don't... don't tell anybody about it, please." She watched the man nod with a small reassuring smile on his face before she walked back to the stairs leading to the perch. Carol climbed the stairs slowly, she took her time so Daryl could continue to take his rage out on inanimate objects to make himself feel better.

It looked like today was going to be the first day Daryl was going to start his journey to recovery. To acceptance. To healing. When Carol got to the top of the perch she could see Lori stood in the doorway of the adjacent cell just staring in horror and concern, T-Dog stood slightly in front of her so if Daryl threw anything he'd be able to stop it from heading towards the pregnant woman. But he'd also be able to restrain Daryl if he needed to, he already had his hand on his gun ready to take him out. Beth stood a little further away with Carl who seemingly picked up on T-Dog's idea and positioned himself in front of Beth so she didn't get hurt, Carl noticed Carol and she came closer to them and took a step back allowing her through the small crowd.

Carol stopped just outside the cell door and took in the sight before her, the whole place had been trashed, not that there was much to ruin. Daryl had cracked the mirror that had been secured to the wall, he had repeatedly kicked the metal toilet until it had a huge dent in the side, he'd kicked the metal frame of the bunk beds until it broke and one of the poles holding the top bed up had split. The mattress from the top bunk was now on the floor in the corner of the room probably where he had kicked it, because there was nothing left for him to break he had resorted to punching the brick wall with his fists, each punch left blood on the wall from the torn skin on his knuckles.

"Daryl?" She called out softly taking a cautious step into the cell, he didn't respond the first time and just kept punching the wall with more and more force each time. Up until the point she heard his knuckles crack under the pressure of his anger, but initially that didn't stop him. "Daryl, stop!" She yelled doing the first thing she could think of and throwing herself in front of him, he barely had time to stop his fist from colliding with the side of her face.

"What the fuck you doin'?" He yelled through his grit teeth. "Get out my fuckin' way, you stupid fuckin' bitch!" He had uttered those words again but this time Carol wasn't offended, they stung like ripping a plaster from the skin, the pain lasted a few seconds before she toughened up. Daryl was mad. He was frightened. The aggressive, foul words that came pouring out of his mouth was just his anger and fear verbalized. She looked back out of the door at the concerned faces waiting to jump into action but she just nodded telling them she would be fine and they could leave, there was no way she'd be able to talk to Daryl and get through to him with everybody hovering, watching his every move.

T-Dog stared at Carol for a moment, he hesitated in moving away in case Carol got hurt, he knew Daryl would never intentionally strike the woman but being as angry as he was at the time... that was a completely different matter. It was only when Lori touched T-Dog's shoulder he began to even consider walking away, he took a few moments to think before heading off in a different direction leaving Carol and Daryl by themselves.

When Carol looked back at the man in the room with her she was caught off guard by how close they were, his face just a few inches from hers as he seethed. his breathing was heavy as he glared daggers at the woman. The fire in his eyes was indescribable. He slammed his hands either side of her head and scowled as he looked at her, she had never seen Daryl so angry even when they'd lost Merle he hadn't been so mad.

Carol reached up gently to touch his face, to smooth away the creases that his anger was causing, to help bring him back down to reality. In his mind he was somewhere else, somewhere far up in the mountains long ago, in his mind the man was in danger and everybody around him was a threat including Carol. So as her fingers reached up to tentatively brush at his skin he slapped her hand away, not even taking into consideration how much force he used or if that force would subsequently hurt her. It shocked her to say the least. Daryl often resorted to physical violence when something escalated but that was only ever when he was confronted by Walkers or... men, never had he shown an inkling of violence towards a woman especially not her. He may have been a racist, aggressive crossbow wielding maniac at times but never that.

Sure he hadn't actually physically beaten her, he just slapped her hand away but the force along with the lack of remorse didn't make him look good. Neither did what happened next. For a fleeting moment Carol could have enjoyed where she found herself, trapped between Daryl's arms as he used his body to pin her to the wall, for a minute it felt like bliss.

The man she had undeniable feelings for, the man who smelled like cucumber and mint and was every day developing as a person, the man who showed the group how likable and trust worthy he actually was compared to his brother... was kissing her. Countless times she had found herself day dreaming and wondering what it would be like to kiss those lips, to know what it felt like to trace his skin with her fingers and to feel his strong arms wrapped around her, she wanted to one day wake up beside him and see him give her his specially reserved 'Daryl smile.'

But everything she thought she would be feeling like the butterflies and the excited breathlessness did not come, not like she wanted. Instead she felt afraid, afraid because the only reason he had crushed his mouth against hers was because he was livid and if she pushed him away she didn't know what he would do. She felt anger towards him too because this was their first kiss and even though she knew they were never going to kiss over a candle lit dinner she wanted it to be different, she wanted it to be because he wanted to kiss her. She wanted to be squirming underneath his body because he was driving her wild, not because she wanted to escape the vice grip he had on her wrist, it felt like he was crushing her in his hands.

She whimpered as he bit down on her bottom lip, this was not how things were supposed to go. He was supposed to be her friend but instead he was hurting her, inflicting pain on her because that was all he could think about doing. With her free hand Carol shoved at Daryl's chest but he barely budged so she did the only thing she could think of, she grabbed the hand that held her wrist and dug her fingers into his bloody and no doubt broken knuckles, she never wanted to inflict pain on him but she had no other way of getting through to him. No other way of getting him to see what he was doing.

It was then and only then he seemed to realise what he was doing, he release Carol's mouth and flew backwards crashing into the broken bunk as he watched the woman lift her hand and press it against her bleeding mouth. Had he really just done that to her? He hadn't meant it. He never wanted to hurt her like that, he didn't even know what made him kiss her, he just remembered unspeakable rage that spawned from his freak out with Rick. He just remembered wanting someone else to feel the pain he was burdened with his whole life.

Neither of them said anything or did anything for a long time after that, they just stared at each other in shock until it became to much to bear, tears filled Carol's eyes whether it was through pain or fear he wasn't sure but he knew it was his fault. He had hurt her, Daryl didn't even move as she edged her way out of the cell and just stood in the middle of the room with his arms by his sides, staring at the ground as if all life had left him.

He could hear Carol crying further down the balcony but felt completely powerless to do anything, he couldn't even move from the spot to go and apologize, he didn't even really know what he'd done. It was all a blur of despair, he heard somebody say his name as they stood in the doorway but he didn't respond, he couldn't. Even when that person stepped into the cell and stood in front of him, he looked right through them. Completely lifeless.

He was just like his father. He was a monster. He had done something unbelievably outrageous. Carol was crying and it was all his fault, he hated himself.

Daryl felt someone touch his shoulder but he didn't care, he didn't even look at them. It could've been his father or a Walker for all he cared, he just didn't want to be there anymore, he deserved to be beaten until he was black and blue, he deserved to have his throat ripped out by undead savages. But it wasn't savages or undead savages, it was Lori. Carol must have told her what had happened and she was doing her best to make sure he was okay, but he didn't deserve to be okay. Initially he pulled his hand out of Lori's as she looked at the damage he had done, but the pull had been so weak that when she took his hand again he didn't even bother trying a second time, he just let her get on with it.

She gently led the broken man out of the cell by his hands, careful not to pull them too quickly and inflict any more pain on him, not that he would show it if she had. He looked vacant. Lost. Alone.

Lori sat Daryl down on his bed before heading to the cell Hershel was in to find gauze and a cloth she could soak in water to clean his hands, the entire block was silent as she moved about. Rick had tried to convince her not to go anywhere near Daryl in his volatile state but somebody had to clean him up, and at the time he was far from dangerous. He was in a different place.

When Lori got back to Daryl he had all but collapsed on to his bed and just lay staring out at the world completely lackluster, she had tried to talk to him just to see if he would respond but he said nothing. Even when Lori placed the saturated cloth on his torn skin and told him four of his knuckles in total were broken, one on the right hand and three on his left. Silently Lori wrapped the wounds in gauze to protect them from infection before using smaller pieces to tie his fingers together, that would help his knuckles heal and keep his fingers straight, he didn't want the knuckle to heal badly leaving his hands disfigured.

"Why don't you get some sleep, you look shattered." Lori said, telling him to do it more than suggesting, he nodded pitifully in reply but didn't close his eyes even as Lori rolled up his poncho and placed it under his head like she'd seen him do a few times. Just like he was a child, Lori pulled the bed covers up around his waist and sat beside the man as he closed his eyes.

She sat beside him for quite some time, she knew she couldn't leave him until he definitely was asleep because he kept opening his eyes to look at her. Lori didn't know if Daryl was trying to get rid of her when he did that or if he was checking she was still there as he was falling asleep but as he didn't say anything, she just choose to stay. To watch over him and give him the peace of mind he needed, he might of hurt Carol in a way that made everybody else want to beat him, but Lori knew... she just knew Daryl wasn't home right now. The grown up Daryl was out and in the shell of his body was a lost and frightened child and he needed protecting.


	3. Chapter 3

When Carol woke late that night to the all to familiar sound of crying she didn't get up to see who it was. She already knew, everybody already knew who was making those sounds. She just couldn't bring herself to get up and help him, she was too afraid. What Daryl had done in that cell had scared her to say the least, there was a fire in his eyes but at the same time he was completely lifeless, it was like he had lost control of his own body and couldn't get back.

It was one of the most terrifying things she'd ever seen or been a part of, to have him physically assault her. When Ed had been alive he had done far worse than that but that was because he was an evil man, Daryl, Daryl was not an evil man and he was nothing like her dead husband. He was a good, kind-hearted man who just had a strange way of showing it.

But this new side of Daryl, the dark and hurtful side she didn't know what to do with. She didn't know how to make this side of him respond positively, in their few minutes of interaction she had learned something new about Daryl though. When he was angry he didn't like to have his face touched, most of the time he didn't like being touched in general but when he was mad... his face was off-limits. It seemed to trigger some kind of memory that bought out his violent emotions.

He hadn't made any effort after that to go anywhere near her or apologize for what he had done which didn't settle well with Carol, Daryl was a stubborn man who didn't like apologizing for anything he had done wrong unless he absolutely had to and that would have been now, in one sense she was glad she didn't have to see him again but in the other she wanted to see if he was okay. To see if Daryl had come back to life.

Carol had heard Lori talking to Glenn outside just after the incident and she told him he was pretty messed up, he hadn't said a single word or gotten mad when she touched him, he hadn't fought to get away from her. Daryl had just sat on his bed completely traumatized by what had happened, and when she told him to get some rest he didn't refuse or tell her where to go, he just lay down, let her tuck him in and closed his eyes.

She sighed, even now when she was supposed to be angry at the man her heart squeezed knowing how much pain he was in, he eyes filled up at the sound of his choked sobs. She was supposed to be pissed off because he'd done something awful, but she wasn't, she couldn't be mad. But Carol also couldn't get up to help him, she was so conflicted. When she heard Lori get up, Carol stayed on her bed facing the wall so the other woman would think she was still sleeping and just leave to see to Daryl without her and that was what happened, at the sound of Lori's footsteps Carol's tears began to fall.

The tears spurred on by the sound of Daryl's dying down and his voice asking for her, Lori's voice telling him she wasn't coming and the awful stream of defamatory words that came out of his mouth. Her tears only stopped when Daryl fell silent and everyone else returned to their cells to sleep.

When morning came Carol left her cell and was dreading passing Daryl on the perch but when she got there he was nowhere to be found, that made getting downstairs easier but then it made her wonder where he was hiding, not that she asked anybody. Breakfast that morning was quiet, everybody sat either outside on the stairs or in one of the empty cells. Any conversation that took place was forced and it was beginning to get on her nerves so she went to find something useful to do, she ended up grabbing the washing cart and filling it with any clothes people would want washing, when she stopped by Daryl's bed she hesitated for a moment not knowing whether to pick up the stuff on the floor or just leave it. She didn't know how he would react to her touching his things, it took a few moments for her to pluck up the courage but she finally picked up the dirty poncho and a shirt he'd thrown on the ground, he didn't have a lot of clothes or personal items with him like the others. Some had a few pair of clothes but Daryl only had what he was wearing and the two items she had just picked up.

She felt a little bad knowing he had to wear the same stuff constantly, it must have been wearing out and if he didn't find anymore he'd probably end up in the inmates uniforms that she'd found down in the laundry room. Carol waited down in the laundry room for the prisons back up generator to come on, Rick insisted they have it on for no more than an hour every time they used it so she loaded as many washing machines as it took and quietly sat down on a bench intending to read the book she had grabbed from the prisons very lucrative library.

The book she had found didn't seem something the convicts would ever read, but who says prison inmates couldn't enjoy a decent romance novel or the memoirs of people who used to be famous and important in everyday life? They could read whatever the hell they wanted if it helped keep them out of trouble. Carol had got just a few pages into the novel when she felt the presence of someone behind the closed-door, for a moment she panicked and thought it may have been Walkers and that she was in danger but as the shadow of the persons feet crept under the door she knew she was safe from undead monsters. It was the man pacing around outside the door she had to worry about, so silently Carol stood up and headed to the door making as little sound as possible and swung it open so she could face the man outside.

Daryl's head lifted quickly so their eyes could meet, neither person said a word they just looked at each other until Carol opened the door a little wider to let him in. He hesitated for a moment before slowly stepping into the room and leaning up against one of the washing machines she was using, Carol then slowly followed the man making sure to close the door and sat back down beside her book. The silence between them was awkward and uncomfortable, she didn't know if Daryl had come down to apologize or if he was mad at her for taking his clothes without asking, Daryl on the other hand didn't know how to apologize properly without sounding like a mumbling idiot so if he wasn't going to apologize he didn't really have any reason to be there. But he stayed anyway, he watched her run a finger across the spine of the book as if she wanted to carry on reading it but felt rude ignoring him to do so, that or she was afraid to stop paying attention to him in case he freaked out and hurt her again. God, he felt like shit for doing that to her. She had only tried to help her but he threw it back in her face by... biting her. What the hell had even possessed him to do that to somebody, it wasn't like he'd ever done it before.

"Good book?" He asked keeping his eyes trained on the cover, it was the first thing he had said to anybody since yesterday's incident so it took her a little by surprise.

Carol nervously cleared her voice as she picked up the book and handed it to him, he looked at the cover of the book for a moment with his eyebrows raised. "It's alright so far, haven't got very far with it yet." When Daryl looked up at her he felt his insides turning in disgust, what had he done to her. Her bottom lip was thick and slightly purple where he had bitten into it and the wrist he had grabbed was red and black from the force he had used, he tore his eyes away from Carol and looked back down at the book she'd given him.

"The t-t-time k-kee-keep-per. The time-keeper." He stammered frowning as he focused on the words, Carol was only partially surprised when she heard Daryl stumble over the words with his childhood and upbringing, reading was probably the last thing he ever thought about. She was a little more shocked by the way he openly showed her how he struggled to read, he hadn't tried to hide it from her like he had everything else, he was completely open. "No pictures, would 'ave trouble." He handed the book back and stared down at his bandaged fingers, he was barely able to hold that book without it sending painful shocks through his hands.

"What happened with you and Rick yesterday?" She asked suddenly distracting him from his train of thought, he lifted his head and bought his thumb to his mouth momentarily forgetting about his broken knuckles he bent his fingers making himself cry out and curse, he heard Carol chuckle a little at his pain and weakly smiled. "You deserve that." She whispered as he switched hand finding the other less painful to bend as it rose to his teeth, he bit at the nail for a while before finding the courage to answer the question.

His voice was a little shaky as he started. "I-I was thinkin' 'bout my father and what we talked 'bout, guess when Rick tried t' push me I saw... him 'nd not Rick." He said quietly all the while trying to avoid Carol's eyes. "Couldn' stop think' after that, was like I wer' stuck." Carol nodded her assumption had been right, Daryl had been completely lost in his memories but it didn't explain why he had become so unnecessarily violent. He seemed to be thinking the same thing, why when he had been so lost in his memories did he become just like his father and abuse the people he cared about, why did he hurt the people he... loved. He loved these people not just her but everybody even if they were a big, dysfunctional, multi-cultural family.

He thought maybe she knew that and maybe she knew how sorry he was for hurting her, he was desperately sorry but he couldn't say those words. Merle had distilled in him that feeling 'sorry' made you weak, if you were weak people would walk all over you. Daryl had seen that this was not true and that if you were weak these people would stand by your side until you were strong again. Sorrow made him dangerous, it made Carol stronger, it made Rick determined and Andrea, it made her fight until the end.

What made him weak was the fact he hadn't had time to acknowledge his past, to accept what had happened and move on. He spent all the time he should have been recovering under Merle's shadow, listening to Merle's instructions, following Merle's every move. Becoming just like Merle.

He didn't want to be his brother, an unhinged, mentally unstable now one-handed moron. He wanted to be Daryl Dixon, but what was Daryl Dixon if not his brother, he hadn't established himself as a person he was just manipulated into the model of another.

"C-Carol?" He whispered softly licking his lips in nervousness. "Am I... just like my brother?"

She frowned and looked up at the man in confusion, this was another new side to Daryl nobody had seen yet, he was practically asking for her help. Asking her to clarify something he couldn't quite figure out himself. What did he mean, was he just like his brother? Biologically, genetically, yes. But physically, mentally and emotionally? Definitely not.

Sure he was hot-headed and used violence as the answer to everything like Merle did but unlike Merle, Daryl could be reasoned with, he could see the truth and the light after breaking through the anger. With his brother that was never possible. All though Daryl was tough around the edges he had a good, kind heart but had trouble displaying the gentler side to him where as his brother did not have a soft side and did not have a good heart.

Daryl had earned his place in the group by looking for Sophia, by opening his heart and even if it was hesitant at first let people in, he'd always go out hunting in an attempt to sustain the group something Merle never wanted to do and very rarely tried to. Carol was afraid of Merle in the sense that he was permanently dangerous and wouldn't refrain from beating or shooting anybody in his path whereas Daryl, she was only nervous around him now because he was emotionally unstable but in his right mind, she's never be afraid of him. She liked him. That was something she would never do when it came to Merle Dixon, Merle Dixon was an asshole and always will be.

"I don't understand, you're not your brother and you know that." She said standing up and heading to one of the washing machines that had beeped to tell her it was ready, when she opened the door and pulled some of the clothes out she sighed at the faint blood stains left in the clothes, although the cold water had got most of it out there was still some left and without being able to use hot water in the machine they were probably going to be there for a few more washes. Carol had informed the group she wasn't going to wash the clothes on a hot cycle because it would use an awful lot more electricity and run the generator down unnecessarily, everybody seemed to understand, even though it wasn't a pressing issue that the group needed to know about she still wanted their general consensus. The clothes were dried in a machine for a short period before they were ready to go back to their owners. Carol grabbed an item and handed it to Daryl expecting him to fold it and place it back in the cart just like she had but he just stared at it. "Are you gonna help me or not?"

He sighed and bit his lip watching her fold one of the girl's shirts within seconds. "Never learned t' do that, no Momma t' teach me." Carol shook her head and groaned dramatically trying to bring humor to the situation before it got to heavy, Daryl scoffed and rolled his eyes as Carol flicked the shirt back out and laid it down on the bench instructing him to do the same. He knelt down by the bench the same way she was and lay the t-shirt out in front of himself she smiled as she showed Daryl step-by-step how to fold a t-shirt, it was almost funny to see him trying so hard to copy exactly what she did but with his hands being so messed up the t-shirt ended up a little oddly shaped, but the little smile of triumph on his face showed how proud he was of his first attempt. That smile made Carol so happy but at the same time it made her want to sob, just was happy he was proud of himself for managing that, but in the same way it was sad he was so proud of being able to fold a t-shirt. Folding a t-shirt was something a child could do, so he should've been bored but instead he placed that one back into the cart and grabbed another t-shirt to give it another go.

By the time they were done Daryl had folded every bodies shirts and had left Carol anything else all of which she had sorted in the amount of time it took him just to do just those shirts, when they were finished they both just sat on the benches together. "Your brother wouldn't have done that." She said gently watching him as he examined his hands.

Daryl nodded. "I guess."

"No Daryl, not I guess. You are a very special completely individual man, you are not your brother, you are both very different men!" Carol said out loud looking at the man who suddenly seemed vulnerable and lost again, he seemed like a child. The childhood he had struggled with in the past kept rearing it's head making him lose himself, but surely if she reassured him that would stop happening.

He'd go back to the normal Daryl who was not bothered by emotions, he would never become overwhelmed or terrified by them, Daryl would just deal with them like anybody else would. Carol wanted to see the Daryl that would have a completely stoic look on his face as somebody told him something he didn't like, she wanted to see him freak out in anger but then realise what he doing and bring himself down again.

She didn't want to see him so mad that he could not help himself, she didn't ever want to relive yesterday's incident.

"Daryl, you are a wonderful man. You are a lot more caring than your brother, he never would have looked for Sophia like you did, he never would've got up two days after getting impaled to try and look for someone else's daughter. You don't have a secret stash of drugs hidden anywhere do you?" She asked seeing him shake his head but refusing to lift it, it didn't take much to see Daryl had a very low esteem when it came to himself. He was confident in his ability to track and hunt but when it came to describing himself he felt like he wasn't worth anything. "You're much better looking than your brother." She giggled nudging him with her elbow, he glanced at her and smirked a bit. "You know what happened yesterday, it doesn't make you a bad person?"

Daryl sighed and shook his head in disagreement. "Look what I done t' you, jus' like Merle, jus' like my f-"

"-No Daryl, don't even think about saying that, you are not like either of those men." Carol said gently using her fingers to lift his chin and meet his eyes, his eyes darted down to her mouth and then her eyes again, he felt slightly uncomfortable with the contact. "You. Are. Not. Them. You might have been brought up to believe what Merle taught you but you are a proper man who can decide what you want, you have your own morals and ethics. Daryl you are adapting and changing, this is a totally new world and every body has changed in some way, I guess your change is just a little more overwhelming." She gently touched Daryl's hand making sure it was the hand that was in better condition, she wanted to support him and didn't want the man to think she was mad at him for what happened, she wanted to show him they could still be good friends. "The angel wings on the back of your jacket are a good description on the way you are heading."

The redneck smiled placing his destroyed hand over the woman's showing his appreciation for trying to build him up, and to show her how sorry he was for hurting her like he had. "Neva be no angel." He said with a weak smile, Carol laughed and smiled as she partially agreed with that. She knew nobody was perfect and that Daryl was always going to be a complex individual but he was going to become a brilliant man, even more so that he was already.

Carol stood up from the bench a little reluctantly, they had to get back to the group before they got the wrong idea, or began worrying about her safety. She didn't know how the group felt about Daryl at the moment, even though she had forgiven Daryl for his behaviour she wasn't sure if the group would be as forgiving, the way he had acted even though it wasn't really him had been very dangerous. There were children in their group. Children and a pregnant woman.

The pair slowly made their way back to their prison wing, Carol pushed the cart back as she continued talking to Daryl, he didn't say much in response he mostly nodded or grunted. When she asked him how his back was today he told her it was pretty much the same as before.

She nodded and even offered to help him out again like she had last time making him smile, it had ended up another of their awkward sexual encounters that made Daryl clam up in nervousness. But he accepted, he couldn't deny that he needed her help. So together they worked on delivering the items of clothing back to every individual, wordlessly Daryl took Lori's clothes from Carol's hands, he didn't have to explain why he wanted to personally deliver the items and that made him thankful. He didn't want to have to explain that he felt almost indebted to Lori for helping him out the previous night, he didn't want to have to acknowledge out loud that he was glad she had helped him.

Daryl carried Lori's clothes to the cell she shared with the woman he had been helping, part of him hoped Lori wouldn't be there but his hopes were dashed as she appeared in the doorway, he carefully held the clothes out to her and allowed Lori too take them as their eyes met. Daryl forced a tight smile and nodded as she smiled back silently understanding what he was trying to do. He was trying to thank her, he didn't want her to say anything because people may overhear so she quietly nodded back and disappeared into the cell.

Daryl let out a sigh of relief and looked over to his perch where Carol was already stood waiting for him, holding on to his poncho and examining it. He didn't know what she was looking at, if it was worn out or had a hole in it, she was just staring intently like it had captured her mind. Carol was a strange woman, she should have been furious at him for what he did to her, she should have slapped him across the face as soon as she saw him outside the laundry room but she didn't.

After a little awkwardness they both settled into their conversation like nothing had happened, she wasn't furious with him in fact, she seemed to have forgiven him. She knew there was something not quite right with him at the time and did not hold him completely responsible for his actions, Carol partly blamed herself for her injuries. She was crazy enough to step into the cell while he was furious, while he was beating seven bells out of the furniture, it was only natural that she would end up hurt. He just wished he had come to his senses before he had bruised her wrist under his hands, before he had bit her mouth.

Daryl slowly walked back over to the perch and stopped beside Carol, who looked up at him in slight surprise, like he had not meant to see her with it in her hands. She tried to smile it off, pretend it was nothing as she handed back his poncho and nodded over to his bed making him chuckle but head towards the mattress anyway.

He dropped the patterned poncho on to the ground and slowly unbuttoned his shirt and shrugged it off, only pausing for a second when his back twinged in pain, Carol seemed to notice his pain and rushed to his side, gently she helped pull his shirt off his arms so his top half became exposed.

She noticed as Daryl carefully lay down on his stomach, that every scar was visible in the daylight and if anybody was to walk by they would be able to see all his marks, but he didn't seem to care. He didn't care who saw his pain anymore he just wanted some of it relieved. So Carol set to work following the same pattern she had last time, starting at his neck. She knew he didn't experience any pain from his back there but Daryl was always so stressed and coiled like a spring and that stress probably wasn't helping the situation with his back, so if she worked on untying a few knots there she might manage to help him de-stress over all.

She had to be honest with herself though, she loved hearing the noises Daryl would make under her hands, it was probably a completely new experience for him to feel pleasure by somebody else's hand instead of pain. That thought bought a question to Carol's mind that she couldn't resist asking him. "Daryl?"

"Mhmm?" He hummed as his eyes fluttered closed, he was comfortable.

"Have you... ever had a girlfriend?" She asked quietly so nobody else would hear them talking, by the way Daryl tensed underneath her she knew the answer to that question. She wasn't surprised by it, Daryl was not the most approachable person to start of with and combined with his upbringing, he probably didn't have any success with women. That was if he even bothered trying, it seemed like he believed he was a bad person and didn't deserve to be cared for or loved so it was probable he didn't attempt to find anybody.

Daryl stayed silent for a moment, no doubt thinking of something to say that didn't make him sound in his mind 'a pussy.' "Don't be wastin' my time wit' a woman. Rather hunt, like the quiet." That was his way of saying no woman had ever been interested in him, no woman had ever been enough to break his shell before. With the knowledge that Daryl had never been with a woman before and that he didn't have any friends in the past, Carol felt honored Daryl was willing to share with her, privileged she could consider him a friend.

Carol smiled hearing Daryl sigh and feeling him lift his shoulders into her touch, he suddenly felt exhausted again. He was so used to running around and taking Walkers out these days that all the adrenaline would keep him going but now, now he physically couldn't have a scrap with the flesh-eaters, there was no adrenaline meaning the lack of energy everybody seemed to suffer with could catch up with him.

"Do you remember how you got all of these scars?" She asked gently running her fingers across the largest one, the one that ran from just underneath his left shoulder-blade, diagonally through his spine to stop on the second to last rib on his right side. She found herself attracted to this one every time she saw it and she had no idea why, it looked like it caused the most pain out of them all. The skin around this scar seemed tight so she had to be very gentle not to pull it to hard, she didn't know if the skin would tear or if it would just tug painfully whatever would happen she had no intention of finding out.

Maybe she found herself drawn to it because it was the scar that made him the most vulnerable, it was the main cause of his pain and looked like when he was given the particularly deep mark it would have left him in agony.

"The one yer touchin', wer' cause I dropped a plate when I wer' twelve, bought a new belt that mornin'." Daryl said opening his eyes to look at Carol, she could see the despair in his eyes, she could see how it all went down through those eyes. "Couldn' walk fer three days. Couldn' walk so I didn' eat." She sighed sadly as he told her more stories about his horrific childhood. "The lil' one jus' here..." He said reaching back to run his fingers down a scar that started at the bottom of his ribcage and headed down to stop just above his waistband. "...Cut me wit' piece I missed, come at me from nowhere." Carol let her fingers brush against the scar as he was telling her about it, she felt their fingers faintly touch at that point and it made her heart race just before he pulled away and pointed to another.

Daryl pointed to a small crescent shape made of dark spots on his back some of the spots were longer and darker than the others but what was more intriguing was the dark brown patch inside the shape, it looked like a coffee-colored birthmark, it had no particular shape but still looked interesting. "My Momma had one jus' like it, he wer' so mad one night, smashed a bottle 'n' tried to stab it off. I wer' 14 when he tried, Merle just got home 'nd saw it through the window, never seen a man take a punch like that 'nd survive. Merle never left me home wit' him after that, used t' send me out huntin' 'til he got back."

Carol gently ran her thumb over the birthmark wondering what Daryl's mother would have looked like probably the same way he had thought countless times, that mark was the only thing he had of his Mother's. "Did you ever see any pictures of your Mother?" She asked carefully going back to massaging the man's back, he shook his head silently allowing his eyes to close again. "What do you think she looked like?"

Daryl lay there in silence for a moment not knowing what to say. "The fuck am I suppose' t' know!" He said a little loud trying to stop himself from thinking about his Mother, it was obvious to Carol that he was angry she left and probably even more mad she left him with that psycho.

"Sorry, it was just a question." She said immediately back tracking to stop him from exploding in anger, he nodded a silent apology but was cut off by a hiss that escaped through his teeth. "That bit's a little tender, huh?" He nodded again and winced as her cold fingers met the skin. The pair didn't talk much after that she had to fully concentrate on finding the most painful parts and working as much of the pain away as she could, but once again when she reached his lower back he found the pain almost unbearable forcing her to stop touching him.

When he rolled over he was frowning a little and trying to regulate his breathing, the pain had been pretty intense and it had him coiled back up again but given a few moments she knew he would relax. She looked over the man and silently thought about how much thinner he had become since the first time they met, with the prison food now they would get regular meals for a while so he could build himself back up again, but she had a feeling he was going to be like this for quite some time. All the running and meagre meals were to blame for that. Carol then glanced around the block as saw most of the group on the lower floor going about their business with little concern for the two above them, everybody was down there except for Hershel, Lori and Carl. When Carol turned her attention back to Daryl his eyes were open and he was staring right at her. She squirmed under his gaze, she wasn't sure what he was thinking.

She was a little taken back when Daryl lifted his relatively good hand and ran his finger across her bottom lip as if his touch would heal the mark, or make it go away completely. She didn't want him thinking the way he was right then so she gently cupped his hand making sure it was loose so she didn't hurt him, but also he could pull away if he felt uncomfortable. Carol lowered the hand to her lap and just held him as his eyes slid shut yet again, he really was bushed, she smiled noticing the way he hadn't flinched at their contact. He had made a little face of confusion but rapidly adjusted and now seemed to in fact relish the feeling of someone holding him.

But just as she saw him settle into sleep something happened, fate flipped the peace on to its head. She leaned down and gently kissed Daryl's hand with the intention of heading downstairs to make herself useful when Lori came out of their cell, she knew. She just... knew.

"C-Carol?" Lori called earning herself complete silence in the block. "I-I think it's time..."


	4. Chapter 4

Everybody was pacing back and forth. T-Dog and Glenn had left and were at the guard towers, T-Dog couldn't stand the screaming while Glenn couldn't cope with not being able to help so T-Dog dragged him out with him. Lori's screams were bouncing off the walls and attracting Walkers, just by looking out of the windows Daryl had seen a fair few more than usual at the fence, any still in the prison would be pretty close by now, it was a good thing they had locked the doors to the other wings.

Daryl had just fallen asleep beside Carol when Lori came out saying she thought she was having the baby, he wasn't sure if he actually groaned out loud when he heard because he knew, now that he was exhausted, there was no way he was going to sleep.

Carol had jumped up from his bed forgetting she was holding his hand making him swear, that certainly woke him up. She had run straight to Lori and took her back into the cell as she yelled for Maggie's help and then called for Rick, there wasn't any more room in cell for anybody else so that left Daryl pacing outside. Not that he'd want to see Lori...giving birth. Daryl glanced at Carl who was stood leaning on the balcony with his fathers police hat in his hand, even though he was furious with his Mother he was going spare hearing her in pain, it was a pain he could not fix.

Beth was stood in the middle of the bottom floor looking in at her father and then up on to the balcony, she kept meeting Carl's eyes trying to reassure him every thing would be okay. In reality they had no clue if everything would be okay or not, with their doctor out of action and the lack of hospital facilities who knew how this was going to pan out.

If they become overrun by Walkers then they would have a serious problem, even with Glenn and T-Dog on watch he still felt uncomfortable, he had to get out there to get away from the screaming. With something else to concentrate on he'd be able to calm his frazzled nerves and make these painful few hours pass much faster. Daryl pushed away from the wall beside Lori's door but paused looking to the frame. "Carol?" He waited for quite some time to hear her reply. "'M goin' outside, you need somethin' 'fore I go?" He asked not wanting to leave her stranded, when she said no he looked to Carl. "Comin'?"

Carl glanced at Daryl, down to Beth and then to the room his Mother was in, when she began to scream again he nodded frantically and headed for the stairs. Before they left the cell block he instructed Carl to grab two guns. Daryl was not fond of using guns he much preferred his crossbow, but with the state of his hands he could barely hold on to it, it made him wish he hadn't punched the wall.

When the pair got outside they reached the guard tower and set up shop, Daryl leant against the rail and set his eyes on the fence as he reloaded his gun. He glanced down to Carl who was reflecting Daryl's stature, it was like he was copying Daryl in an attempt to calm himself but he didn't know the man was actually as nervous as him.

This was not a position he had ever been in before, he had never met a pregnant woman before much less seen a woman go into labour and bring a newborn baby into the world. In the past when he lived in the mountains, he didn't get to meet an awful lot of new people and the people he did meet tended to be men.

Daryl watched Carl as he stood beside him for just a few moments until he began to get a little restless, Carl's discomfort was beginning to rub him up the wrong way. It was making him just as edgy. Daryl planted his hand on Rick's boy's shoulder to stop him from pacing the balcony, he could see in the child's eyes how conflicted he was, how he was in complete turmoil. The poor boy was still angry with his Mother for having an affair with Shane even though she thought Rick was dead, she had lied to Carl telling him Shane was just a good friend but instead she was running off into the forest for a not so romantic rendezvous with the other officer.

Daryl looked into the eyes of the young man and could almost see himself, he could see the same situation. A scared little man who had built himself hundreds of emotional barriers to stop the hurting, to deal with the pain by suppression. He could see in Carl's eyes how he wished he could go back to the way it used to be, when all he had to do was worry about whether he'd finished his geography homework in time and not wonder if he was going to live to see another day and not wonder whether the baby being brought into the world was his half sibling or full sibling.

"Helluva day, huh?" Daryl whispered knocking the boy's shoulder. Carl looked up at the man obviously surprised that not only had he taken Carl from the terrifying situation in the prison, he intended to start a conversation. Daryl wanted to get Carl talking again so he could calm him down.

Carl slowly pulled his hat off and held it in his hands, Daryl could see by the way he was clinging to his father's hat he wished his father was there. Even though Lori needed Rick to help her through this, he also needed his father, he needed Rick to be in two places at once but that was completely impossible. So it was up to Daryl, it was up to him to almost 'father' the boy. That was a position he never thought he'd find himself in, standing beside a child who needed someone to take care of him, he needed his parents but the only person available was a man who knew nothing about family or friendships. He knew practically nothing about children or loving relationships, he knew nothing about the emotions or mentality of a child. He just knew that kids had to go through an awful lot in their life time.

"What's going to happen to my Mom?" Carl asked looking over at Glenn and T-Dog as they kept watch on the second guard tower.

The man sighed in return scratching his head as he racked his brains to find a decent answer, but there was nothing he could say to make the boy feel better. "I dunno kid, neva been in this situation 'fore." Daryl told Rick's son honestly. "Never seen no baby 'fore."

Carl looked at Daryl suddenly in complete shock, how could somebody not of seen a baby before? Daryl was somewhere between thirty and forty so he definitely had time to meet a baby. "You've never seen a baby before?" Carl asked raising his eyebrows when the man shook his head. "So you didn't have a family before all of this?"

Daryl groaned rubbing his shoulder and pushing off the ledge to pace the catwalk. He should have flat-out told Carl "no" and changed the subject but instead he found himself thinking. Thinking about the family he didn't have before the infection took over and killed most of the population, he didn't have a wife or a girlfriend he lost, he didn't have a child or multiple children he could grieve for after they died. It was just him and Merle. No beautiful country girl wife that drove a ford pickup, looked awesome in a pair of tight jeans or was able to knock him down a peg or two when he got too riled up. He couldn't mourn for a child who would rush to him as he came through the door and hug his legs, or cry for a beautiful daughter who liked listening to him read her a story every night.

He never had any of that because he didn't know how to approach women or make conversation, hell the man didn't know a lot of women he could actually 'approach.' Daryl knew exactly why he couldn't approach women back in the day, it was his childhood. He spent every day being beaten and abused as his father screamed about him being useless, worthless and unloved.

The fact his father beat the crap out of him and told him he was the worst person in the world meant he felt exactly that way, he hated thinking about himself. He hated thinking about the way he hated thinking about himself, he wanted to like himself, he wanted to look in a mirror and not feel disgusted and infuriated.

"No kid, jus' me and Merle."

Something flickered in Carl's eyes that almost looked like pity, a thirteen year old boy pitied a grown man making Daryl feel sick, he didn't want a kid to pity him. He didn't want to make this moment about him, it was supposed to be about supporting Carl. "You didn't have anybody else?" Carl asked as if he was trying to confirm what he'd just heard, when Daryl shook his head again Carl frowned. "That's kind of sad I guess."

Daryl shrugged and flexed his fingers a little completely ignoring the sharp pains that shot through his hands. "I gotta family now, don't I?" He said in reply to the young man. Even though it was the craziest family in the world, it was the only real family he had, they cared about him the way a real family would. Carol cared about him as if they had known each other forever, she was taking care of him like he was important to her. He had absolutely no idea why that woman would give a damn about him because nobody else did, nobody else had ever loved him so why would she?

He hadn't even given her a reason to love him, he had warmed to her a little and admittedly he did have a soft spot for her but he still hadn't done anything for her in particular, Daryl was just being... Daryl.

Carl smiled a little. "You're not gonna make me call you Uncle Daryl or anything, are you?" Daryl looked at the boy and smirked slightly as he stood beside him, he had no idea the boy had a sense of humor on him, he thought the boy would be as dry a both his parents. "Daryl, whats gonna happen to us, I mean all of us?"

The man met the boy's eyes and sighed again, that was a question nobody could answer with the complete truth, because nobody really knew the truth. They couldn't determine whether the Walkers would live forever or eventually starve to death, Daryl couldn't tell whether the group was going to survive another week, if they were going to be able to eat every night. "I-I dunno Carl, I ain't no fuckin' fortune teller." He said calmly despite using profanity, Carl was going through enough as it was and certainly didn't need Daryl on his case too.

Daryl turned his attention from Carl out to the fence keeping his eyes on the gathering Walkers, they were going to nip out of the prison at some point to get baby formula and this large group of Geeks was going to make it difficult. He considered for a while grabbing an iron bar and slotting a few through the link fence to make it easier for later, but holding on to the pistol was hard enough, if he even attempted grabbing a bar he'd probably do more damage to himself then the Walkers.

He really didn't want to cause more trouble for everybody, there was a woman in labor and a man missing the lower half of his leg, they did not need a man with broken hands and a Walker bite wandering the cell block. Not that he'd go back into the prison, but once he was a Walker he couldn't ever be sure what he'd actually do.

It wasn't long after that Carl began pacing around instead, he really wanted to know what was going on and how his Mother was doing but there wasn't a lot he could do without getting in the way. So Daryl used his mind, he remembered seeing a pack of cards on the desk inside the guard tower, maybe he could use those to distract him for a while. The man moved from his spot into the guard tower to grab the pack and opened them in front of Carl. "Tell anyone I can do this 'n' I'll chuck ya off the tower." Daryl said arranging the cards the way he needed them. He didn't want anybody knowing he had the ability to do card tricks, Merle had always told him card tricks were lame but they used to help Daryl escape when he needed it, the tricks helped a young boy who had been abused his entire childhood escape and find freedom.

Carl watched Daryl quietly as he showed him some of the simplest but relatively interesting card tricks he could remember, he hadn't got his hands on a pack of cards in a long time and expected his skills to be rusty, but surprisingly enough they were still sharp.

It was only when Daryl felt the presence of someone behind him he stopped playing with the cards, he turned around to see a weary and exhausted Carol stood in the doorway, a small smile on her face. She told Carl his Mother and Father were both looking for him and he had a new beautiful sibling to meet, Carl darted for the door but stopped just in front of Carol and looked back silently, Daryl groaned dramatically and rolled his eyes as he handed the young man the pack of cards watching him head off back into the prison.

Daryl watched the boy from the guard tower up until he made it back into the building and then leant his back against the railing so he could look at Carol. She was exhausted but the smile on her face told him the birth went, by luck, relatively well. There were a million and one things that could have gone wrong during the birth so it really was miracle that the latest addition to the group came into the world safely. Daryl wasn't too sure how he felt about living in a group with a newborn baby, this baby was going to be the source of great joy and hope but at the same time it would be difficult and dangerous. The baby's screaming and crying would attract Walkers from everywhere, Rick and Lori's newborn baby's tears would be lovely but would slow the group down.

He watched the woman as she rubbed her forehead, all that screaming must have given her a terrible headache. Carol walked towards him and stopped so they could look each other in the eyes, there was just a small gap between their bodies and from that distance she could smell that beautiful shower gel again. She closed her eyes for a moment taking in the gorgeous smell and let it calm her raging headache. Daryl seemed to notice and without thinking he straightened himself up and opened his arms to her, with all the emotional support the woman had given him recently she deserved something in return, she needed just as much support as he needed.

Carol smiled as he leaned over to take her hand and pull her in, his behaviour was unusual, he wanted to hold her in his arms. She stepped into the man's arms and let him wrap her up tightly, throwing his right arm around her shoulders and his left around her waist, the woman's head rested against his shoulder and her face pressed against his neck where it just felt natural. She felt safe and comfortable.

His healthiest hand gripped her shoulder as he stared at the glass of the guard tower, he could see his reflection and see how the pair fit together perfectly, this was not something he had ever experienced before. He never held a woman in his arms like that and it felt good, it felt right.

It was having an insane effect on his body as well as his emotions, he felt his heart racing at the speed of light and his palms sweating like crazy, his mind was telling him so many different and conflicting things that he could not work out which thoughts were right and which were wrong. He was feeling a little edgy especially knowing Glenn and T-Dog were stood not so far away and probably watching them, they were going to start gossiping about the man and woman with the rest of the group. But at the same time he felt a strange euphoria, everything he had missed out on was right here in his arms.

A woman who cared about him, a woman who knew all about the things he had been through and didn't think he was a freak or a monster, she just wanted to be there for him. With him. Carol on the other hand felt completely relaxed like she'd just sunk into a hot bubble bath. She wasn't afraid of this man not like she had been earlier that day, now she felt utterly safe in his strong toned arms, she felt despite Daryl being emotionally shut off most of the time he was openly showing his feelings for her.

Neither one of the pair dared ask the other the true extent of their feelings, especially not right now, they had only just sealed a true bond and to push to far would probably cause it to break. Nobody wanted to see their relationship go from close friends verging on something else to strangers, strangers keeping each other at arm's length for the rest of their lives.

Carol slowly wrapped her arms around Daryl's waist noting for the first time he wasn't wearing his leather jacket, he was just wearing his brown patterned shirt, the one he'd torn the sleeves off like he'd done with his other shirt. He had a thing for sleeveless shirts, she'd seen Hershel hand him a shirt one day on the farm and as soon as Hershel walked away he ripped the sleeves off and used them as rags to clean his truck, the shirt ended up being left behind when they escaped the Walker herd. "That was a good thing you did for Carl you know." She said suddenly as she held on to the fabric of his shirt in one of her fists. "Bringing him up here, distracting him, keeping him calm."

Daryl just shrugged looking down at the woman leaning against him. "Couldn' handle the screamin' neither could I, makin' ma head hurt." He said honestly, he didn't really know what to do or what to say after that. They were both exhausted and could really do with getting their heads down but now there was a new baby that was going to keep them up all night, so instead they both just stayed where they were, holding each other like they were more than just friends. His hands were aching as he watched her, Carol's eyes were closed as she lay against him looking for comfort. A few months ago Daryl never would have behaved this way, he never would have accepted the contact or even considered holding his hands out to anybody else.

He remembered all the times he had flinched away from her touch, or frowned every time she smiled at him. He had been so cruel to her since they had met. Daryl had called her many names and even went as far as blaming Carol for the death of her daughter, even though it was him who failed to bring back the little girl when he went looking for her. If he hadn't of fallen down that ravine and impaled himself he might have been able to bring Sophia back alive, if he had bought the girl back alive things may have worked out different.

"Daryl, you are thinking to hard." Carol said lifting her head to look up at the man, as he turned his head down she realised just how close they really were. Their faces just a mere centimeter apart, at this distance she could feel his warm breath fanning her lips, she could look into his eyes and see his burning thoughts and desires. Carol could feel her heart racing and fluttering like she was a school girl again, it would be so easy for her to rise on to her toes and seal the remaining gap but she knew if that wasn't what he wanted too he would freak out. Beside the point just yesterday he had forced himself on her, he had forcibly kissed and then bit her. She didn't think he would do it again but he on the other hand, probably would believe that he'd hurt her, he would doubt himself.

Seconds after this thought it also seemed to occur to Daryl making him turn away and look elsewhere, he suddenly felt uncomfortable and cleared his throat. "What's the baby like?" He asked distancing himself from her again, he slid himself across the rail to escape her body but at the same time he still very loosely held her hand in his. She was glad he didn't completely push himself away like he had before, he still wanted her there with him. "Never seen no baby 'fore." He told her the same way he had told Carl, where he had lived there were no pregnant women and no newborn babies, only mountains.

Carol smiled up at him, she could see how curious he was, he wanted to see this new baby and see what all the fuss was about. This small child that was born by screaming and agony, brought into the world by pure luck. The redneck man had never seen a small bundle of joy like everyone else in their group had, he'd never had the privileged of holding a tiny child against his chest, he'd never felt the soft skin of a baby or listened to them giggle and endlessly babble.

"They have not named her yet, but she is beautiful Daryl, she is beautiful." She didn't have anything else she could say about this little girl, she was the embodiment of hope for the human race. The unnamed child was the new beginning the human race needed, she was the start of planet Earth's repopulation, she and every other child that was born or would be born in this monstrous world would be the inspiration every survivor needed to live on more day. "Why don't you come and meet her?" Carol said gently pulling the man towards the door of the guard tower, she hadn't even given him the chance to refuse.

He didn't want to get in Rick and Lori's way, they had just become a family again and he didn't want to disturb that. Carol on the other hand didn't seem bothered by that, she just wanted to go back into the prison and set her eyes on that little girl again. Daryl gasped as Carol pulled him making his knuckles scream in pain, he yanked his hand out of hers in surprise but made sure to show her he wasn't mad, he moved up to walk beside her and draped his arm around her shoulders. Carol looked down at the ground and then back to the man as they made their way into the cell block, she lead Daryl up to the cell Lori was in with her family and stopped in the doorway.

Daryl looked in at the family and felt the same pain he had when he was talking to Carl, he wished he had that kind of family. He wished he had a family like theirs even if it was dysfunctional and messed up, he wanted a family he could adore, Daryl wanted a family he now knew he never could have. He couldn't have a family in this world, he could never bring a child into a world filled with flesh-eating monsters.

He wouldn't be able to cope with sending his family out into an environment where they would likely be killed and then reanimate into Walkers. That would destroy him.

Daryl looked in the cell as Lori cooed at the new baby, stroking the child's face with her fingers. Rick was sat on the end of the woman's bed with his now eldest child, it seemed Rick already knew about Daryl's lack of experience with children thanks to Carl, the man invited Daryl in. The redneck for a few moments hesitated not knowing whether he should approach or not, he only stepped in when Carol took his arm off her shoulders and pushed him inside the cell, making him head towards the mother and baby.

"She's real funny lookin'." He said smiling as the unnamed girl looked up at the stranger, just like Carol had said the little girl was beautiful, she was like nothing he had ever seen before. A tiny little girl wrapped in her father's filthy shirt as her Mother held her tight in her arms. "Definitely yours Grimes." He said looking between the girl and her Father, for the first time in a long time Rick chuckled muttering a 'Gee thanks.' Daryl leaned forward slightly to look at the little one's face, he didn't want to get too close because he was grimy and dirty, he was supposed to take a shower today but instead he went to the laundry room to find Carol.

Lori took the man by surprise when she offered the baby out to him, Carol watched as he glanced back at her not knowing what to say or do. He didn't know whether to refuse and run away or accept, if he accepted he had no clue how to hold a baby and didn't even know if his hands would take the strain. All of a sudden Daryl had gone into child mode again, he was scratching his arm and looking around for reassurance, he was wallowing again. His eyes darted around to everyone in the room as he pressed his hand to his mouth and chewed on his thumb, he was nervous again.

She knew it wasn't Lori's intention to make Daryl uncomfortable but Carol knew he just wasn't ready for that yet, he didn't trust himself to hold the little one in case he did something to hurt her. He'd bit Carol like a child might so he could only imagine a hundred much more horrific things he could do to a new baby, if he suddenly lost control of himself that baby would not stand a chance. He just couldn't bring himself to even touch her much less actually hold the girl in his arms.

Everybody in the room seemed to be picking up on his discomfort and surprisingly it was Carl who changed the subject and gave Daryl an alternate option. He asked Daryl to teach him a few card tricks so he could use them to impress Beth no doubt, Daryl took a couple of deep breaths trying to calm his nerves and reign his panic back in before nodding at Carl.

"Yeah c'mon kid, gotta good'n I can show ya." He said without a second thought to Lori or the baby, he just wanted to get out of that little cage and relax again, he purposely brushed Carol as he walked past and lead Carl over to the stairs so he could sit down and play properly. It amazed Carol how Carl had suddenly taken a shine to Daryl despite stealing from the pouches on his bike a few months before, despite being slightly afraid of him in the past. Everybody seemed to realise how decent Daryl Dixon really was, even his relationship with T-Dog was better than it had been, Daryl hadn't once said anything offensive to T-Dog since the farm. He'd stopped even thinking about calling T-Dog anything remotely racist the same way he stopped calling Glenn 'short round' or making Asian jokes at him.

Carol lingered in the doorway for a while so she could keep an eye on Lori's health, after at least half an hours 'observation' and some small talk mostly about the man who had now gone into full teaching mode Carol decided to move from her spot, her exhaustion had set in now and she just wanted to lie down. But she didn't want to lie down in the same cell as the family so she walked towards Daryl's bed and sat down for a while, just watching Daryl and Carl discuss cards. She heard Daryl swear quite a few times when he seemed to forget how messed up his hands were but he didn't give in, he just carried on until he was sure Carl knew the ins and outs of that trick, Daryl only turned around to look at Carol as Carl ran off with the deck to show what he had learned to anyone who would pay attention.

Daryl chuckled and raised his eyebrows at the woman sitting on his bed. "Ain't gon' give me no peace?" He said referring to the fact they had spent nearly all day together today, Carol smiled and mumbled something about leaving if she wanted rid of him but he just shook his head and lay on one of the mattresses beside her. As soon as he lay down his eyes began to feel painfully heavy and he yawned loudly. "Woman, jus' lie down, ye ain't goin' anywhere else."

It didn't take much to convince Carol to lie beside him, she was exhausted and right now a bed roll out in the courtyard would have seemed appealing. "Will you wake me up for supper?" She mumbled shuffling herself a little closer to his body so she could feel his warmth.

Daryl didn't think he'd even be awake for supper in order to wake Carol up, but he hummed in agreement too, grunting in agitation as she shuffled about. "God damn, will you stay still woman!" He snapped automatically regretting his tone as she stayed completely still, so he sighed and without a second thought draped his arm around Carol so his hand rested on the shoulder furthest away and his elbow lay against her stomach.

"Night Daryl." She whispered so faintly he almost didn't hear.

"Mmm, night."


	5. Chapter 5

**Note to all you lovely people wishing to discuss the latest episode of the Walking Dead, I live in England and we are an episode behind America, so pleeeeease refrain from sending me messages or reviews with snippets of your latest episodes. I've had 4 e-mails and a review with pieces now and every time I open them I die inside a little.**

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Daryl was bored out of his mind. With his knuckles being so badly damaged he was limited in the things he could do, he had already taken a shower today, played cards with Carl and refilled the water canteens. After that he un-bandaged his hands and hoped they had magically healed over night but that was not the case, so he tied them back up and folded his clothes beside his mattress, he went up to the guard tower on watch for a few hours but then someone had come up to take over.

After that he didn't really know what else to do, he couldn't exactly go out hunting and it was making him stir crazy, he had paced the perch for half an hour before deciding to head out into the yard to try and calm down. He was becoming more and more irritable as the day continued, he hated not being able to pull his weight, hated not being able to be independent. What made it worse was he'd have to endure this for at least another week, after that he'd probably be able to use his right hand like it was normal and be able to get on with a few things at least, but his left hand was going to stay out of action for a little longer.

It had been just over a week since his outburst that resulted in broken knuckles, it had been exactly a week since the birth of Lori and Rick's baby and more than an entire week since he had revealed to Carol the brutal nature of his child hood. And what a long week it had been, while he had nothing to do during the day, he found himself thinking an awful lot. Thinking about how many people they had lost including his brother Merle, thinking about how they lost Sophia, thinking about all the anger he felt when she died the second time... how he aimed that anger at Carol because she cared and that scared him.

Every time she touched him he didn't know whether to let her in or whether to throw his guard back up and push her away, he didn't know why he still felt he needed to guard his feelings but he did, he still wanted to protect himself from everyone.

But despite wanting to hide away he had really been pushing his boundaries, he had fought with his instincts and allowed himself to hold Carol and he even allowed her to sleep beside him. He had put his arm around her and held her the entire night, when he woke up she had been pressed against his side with her arm wrapped around his waist, his hand holding her arm in place.

Daryl groaned in frustration hearing the baby cry even though they were a fair distance away from him, the baby's crying was not helping his current situation, the little girl was driving him crazy. Crazier than he was already. The same place, the same people, the same old routine. He was going out of his mind.

What he really wanted more than anything right now was a cold beer while he was sat out in the open air, he wanted to be able to lie down in the long grass and stare up at the stars without worrying about Walkers getting in. Without worrying about being a danger to everybody else.

He felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up all of a sudden, someone was behind him, someone was coming towards him. As subtly as he could he glanced over his shoulder praying it was not a Walker or somebody carrying the baby, he really didn't feel like dealing with either of those today, but unsurprisingly it was Carol. She had followed him around like a lost puppy recently and ge couldn't decide if he was enjoying it or if it was suffocating, either way he was glad it was her and nobody else, feeling as bad as he did today was making him grouchy.

He silently counted in his mind how long it took for Carol to make her way towards him and sit down beside him, she sat as close as she could so their shoulders touched. Daryl pulled his knees up against his chest and wrapped his arms around his legs as he stared out at nothing in particular, Carol sat with her legs stretched out in front of her and forced her hands between her knees. Neither of the pair spoke for a while and just relished each others company. "Glenn is going out on a supply run in a minute, you should go with him. Get yourself some new clothes and maybe another pair of shoes." Carol suggested, breaking the silence between them. Daryl sighed and nodded, she might have made him feel a little better but he still didn't feel like talking much, he just felt drained. "Are you okay?"

He let out another breath and met her eyes hoping to find his spark, hoping to find his rebellious streak but instead he felt irritated. She was mothering him again, he didn't need mothering or to be fussed over he just needed something to help him get over his boredom. Maybe going on a supply run with Glenn would help with his restlessness and he could do a few more shirts, he was fed up of having to sleep and work and wander around in the same shirt while the second shirt was being cleaned. He could not handle the thought of wandering around shirtless, even before the disease took over he didn't like walking around in his own house with no shirt on. "Jus' tired." He lied, he was pretty sure she could tell he was lying but he really didn't care, he needed to get out and do something. And he certainly didn't want her to know he was just grumpy because he was bored.

It was then he heard someone whistle from on top of the guard tower, he looked over his shoulder again to see Glenn stood with his pistol in his hand. "You coming?"

Daryl glanced back at Carol for a second and pushed himself to his feet, a supply run seemed like the only way he was going to blow off steam today. He let his hand rest against the top of Carol's head for a moment as he walked away, he did not want her to think he was mad at her again, he was just all round frustrated.

The redneck headed up to the Asian man who soundlessly handed him a loaded pistol and held out the keys to one of the cars, Daryl just held his hands up showing Glenn the bandages, he hated the thought of letting someone else drive but there was no way he could do it without putting them at risk.

As they jumped into one the pick-ups Glenn handed Daryl his pistol and their 'shopping list,' Daryl unfolded the dirty scrap of paper and examined the words, he was glad the words were written so clearly or he would've had more trouble than usual reading the words. Daryl glanced at Glenn from the corner of his eye hoping he was paying too much attention to the road to notice him mouthing the words on the list, he was at high risk of being caught but if he was going to get anything on this list he had to know what it said.

He got as far as four letters into the first word before Glenn looked at him in confusion. "The first one says formula." He said helping the man who seemed to be struggling, Daryl glared at the other man before grunting in annoyance and folding the paper back up, he didn't want to embarrass himself anymore.

The truck pulled up outside an abandoned daycare centre where they could, if they were lucky, find baby formula and anything else their latest addition may require. Glenn made sure to make it clear that if Daryl saw anything the baby would need now or later to grab it, it might not be there the next time they came back.

As they wandered through the centre Daryl found plenty of items he thought the baby would like when she was a little older and stuffed them in a rucksack Glenn had given him, Glenn was looking for the items on the list and he was looking for toys. He found a small doll lying on a table, a soft teddy-bear and even a patchwork knitted blanket. When Glenn came back to the main room he had everything on the list he could find, Daryl quietly mentioned driving to the small clothing store at the end of the town, he was going to take Carol's advice and grab some more clothes. But they had to be quick, Walkers were wandering nearby and he didn't want to get caught up in a miniature herd.

Despite reservations about the plan Glenn agreed allowing the redneck man to grab anything he wanted, providing it fit in his bag. He grabbed a couple of shirts and a pair of dark jeans before looking around for things the rest of the group might like, he didn't know any of the groups sizes so he grabbed as many medium size t-shirts, jumpers he could find for both the men and women. He didn't have enough room for anything else in his rucksack and ended up having to carry everything else, when a rogue Walker came stumbling through the store they both knew it was time to leave and drove away as fast as they could.

The run hadn't made him feel much better than earlier, he still felt like a coiled spring and it was uncomfortable, he found himself chewing on his bottom lip to the point it become raw and slightly swollen. He then switched to biting his thumbnail, not only was he agitated by not being able to hunt he was a little nervous because of the items he grabbed. He hoped Lori and Rick would be happy with the small items he'd found for the baby, but in his mind there was a voice laughing at him telling him he was pathetic, telling him they'd hate it and he was an idiot. He hated the fact he still listened to the voice in his mind that sounded like a mixture of his father and brother, it made him doubt his every move, his every word.

Daryl was also worried about the clothing he had picked up for the others, he hadn't grabbed much and at the time didn't think about the two teenagers in their group so there probably wasn't anything in there for them, but while Glenn and Daryl were rushing around in the store he didn't get any time to decide what he thought people would like. He just grabbed what he could and left.

When Glenn pulled up back in the prison a while later he shut off the engine and turned to Daryl, Daryl groaned knowing the younger man was going to stick his nose into his business and irritate him a little more. "Are you alright, you don't seem yourself?" He asked taking off his belt as Daryl did the same and climbed out, he placed his rucksack on the car's roof and grabbed the second launching that at Glenn as he booted the passenger door shut, he heard Glenn grunt as he caught it and stormed off throwing his bag on to his shoulder. Who the hell gave him the right to start poking around in his business, start analyzing his emotions and body language, who allowed anybody permission to start giving a damn about him. He didn't need every bodies pity, he didn't want people thinking he needed to talk about his feelings.

Daryl headed off into the prison not giving a damn that Maggie was glaring at his back because she'd seen his throw the bag at Glenn, he certainly didn't care that Rick was walking towards him and was going to ask what just happened, when Rick approached and gripped Daryl's shoulder he immediately yanked himself away from the man and carried on towards the inside of the prison. It seemed these people all of a sudden thought he was weak and pathetic, that he needed someone to take care of him and he didn't need or want that. Maybe he wanted Carol to take care of him but not in that sense, he wanted Carol to massage his back when he was hurting, he wanted her to teach him how to fold clothes. He enjoyed her company, he enjoyed...her.

He stalked up onto the perch and emptied his bag on to his mattress and without saying a word to anyone he began sorting the items out, he made sure to separate his clothes from the spares and make a pile of the babies things.

As he was going about his business and trying to cool off he heard a voice, a voice that suggested Maggie was miffed. Glenn and Rick were both following and trying to calm her down but she was really angry. "Why should he get to treat anybody like that?" She seethed as she stormed through the block. "He was just looking out for him!"

Daryl growled and climbed to his feet grabbing the babies stuff and a t-shirt for Lori and stalked to her cell, she stood in the doorway looking out at the commotion with the little one in her arms. She smiled and moved aside letting him bring them in and place them on her bed, when he turned back he glanced down at the still nameless little girl and gently ran his finger across the baby's cheek, despite all the crying and screaming she really was beautiful.

He turned to the door to leave again and found Carol stood in his way, one hand on her hip and the other holding the iron bar. "What did you do?"

"Why's everyone gotta be on my case, can't you leave me be?" He spat angrily storming out of the cell and heading for his mattress again, completely ignoring Maggie as she stood at the bottom of the stairs yelling at him, ignoring Carol as she tried to get his attention and just grabbed one of the flannel shirts he picked up.

He left his perch and headed into a cell so he can change as quickly as he possible and get out again, he hated those cells. Those were a constant reminder of the horrific path he could've chosen, he could have become a violent thug and may have even ended up in this prison. He may have ended up as one of those prisoners lying face down on their way out of their cells. Daryl could have been dead. But that wasn't the only thing the cells reminded him of, it reminded him of the time Merle... He automatically pushed that thought from his mind as soon as it occurred, he did not want to think about that.

Daryl stepped back out of the cell where Carol was stood again, she raised her eyebrows and grinned, when she advised him to go and get some more clothes she didn't think he'd go for something so... vibrant. It was a long-sleeved flannel shirt but probably wouldn't stay like that long, the shirt was checkered bright blue and black and without blood stains it actually looked good. The shirt fit relatively well and really amplified the broadness of his shoulders and the muscles of his arms looked great.

He was chewing his thumb again when he met her eyes, he didn't know what she was going to say about his choice. She'd probably say the same thing Merle said last time he wore a similar shirt at home. She'd call him a pansy queer at least she couldn't beat the crap out of him while drunkenly yelling at him.

He was a little taken back when she told him how she felt about it. "I like it." Carol said very simply, giving him one last smile before heading down to the lower floor probably to calm Maggie down. She was still pretty angry because Daryl threw the rucksack at her boyfriend, not that it bothered Daryl much, he'd just blank her and probably piss her off a little more for fun.

Daryl sat himself on his mattress and just listened to everybody chatting, in Maggie's case more yelling, and working around him. He really wanted to be out their working too but he knew he'd just be more of a hinderance than a help.

He watched Lori slowly make her way across the balcony with the little one in her arms and stop in front of him, at that moment he knew what she was going to ask and why she was doing it. Daryl was the only person in their entire group that had not yet held the baby, he was still afraid of hurting the little one and didn't want to risk touching her. "I need to go and make her bottle Daryl, could you take care of her for just a little while?"

He stared up at the woman like she was insane, she knew he didn't know how to take care of a baby and knew at times his anger was barely controllable, Lori knew how wound up he was today but still wanted him to take her precious child. She still trusted him with the life of her daughter. He just sat and stared at the woman and her child as she carefully knelt beside him with her baby bundled in one of her Father's shirts, Glenn had grabbed some clothes from the day care centre but hadn't brought them up to Lori yet so the baby remained in the shirt. With one hand Lori cautiously adjusted the position of Daryl's arms so she didn't hurt him or make him freak out, she kept flicking her eyes up to meet him and silently reassure the man he'd be just fine, he couldn't find his voice to refuse the request. He could remember being told to never refuse if someone asked you to do something and then being beaten, maybe that was why his voice disappeared because he was too wrapped up in a bad memory to force the words out.

Daryl took a deep breath when he felt the weight of the baby in his arms, initially his hands screamed in pain but as Lori adjusted the girl the pain melted away leaving just the light weight of the sleeping child. His eyes were wide as he looked down at her, she was so still and so quiet, it was beautiful just like Carol had said. This little tiny girl who had been born in to such a horrific existence was completely at peace in the arms of a stranger, he may not have been a stranger to her Mother but he was too her, he was an utter stranger.

When Lori stood he panicked a little, he didn't know what to do if the girl cried. He didn't know what to do if she needed the bathroom. And what if she was sick? Or if he was holding her too tight? What would happen if he didn't support her head and neck properly like Lori told him too? Would she have to live for the rest of her life with a crooked neck? "D-Don't go, not yet." He said looking up at her with a desperation in his eyes that she had only ever seen once before, when they had lost Merle. When he came back to the group and was just numb for a few hours.

"It's okay, you're doing just fine." She replied and within seconds she had walked away and just left them, that meant he had to calm down. He had to soothe his nerves in order to keep the little girl safe, it was almost like hunting. If he was calm and quiet the little girl wouldn't pick up on him the same way his prey never picked up on him, if he used soft fluid movements to change positions that unnamed girl would be okay. Usually when he hunted he wasn't terrified like he was at that moment, he wasn't afraid of his prey making an ear-piercing noise or relieving themselves on him.

The baby shuffled a little making him freeze in case she started screaming but instead she seemed to snuggle into the shirt to find comfort, Daryl couldn't stop the smile that grew on his face, she was pretty cute. "You might be cute now but we're gon' teach ya how to kick some ass, lil' lady." He whispered feeling brave enough to say the words out loud and stroke her cheek at the same time, he sat with the little girl in his arms for a little while before the desire to stretch kicked in, sitting in that position with the bundle made his back ache. Despite feeling a little more comfortable with the little one he didn't quite think he was ready to get up and wander about with her, so he very carefully maneuvered her so she rested against his chest and then lay himself down using his already rolled up poncho as a pillow.

He strained to look down at the top of the baby's head and make sure she was okay, ignoring the pain it caused he wrapped his hands around the little one to keep her safe. He didn't want her rolling or shifting all of a sudden and falling off, he wasn't sure if a week old baby could even do that kind of thing but he didn't want to risk it, Daryl knew he'd never forgive himself if she got hurt under his care.

When a slightly longer period of time passed then he expected Daryl soon realized Lori didn't need to go and make a bottle for the little one, she just left him with the baby so he'd become comfortable with her, so he'd want to cuddle the little girl he was no doubt going to have to protect one day. As he lay there thinking about that prospect he found himself drifting in and out of sleep, every time his eyes closed he forced them back open because he didn't want to fall asleep with the little girl on top of him. But that was inevitable, he found himself being woken up by Carol just an hour later, in her hand she held a little bowl of food and the baby's bottle.

Daryl grunted and groaned as he sat up scrubbing his eyes with one hand and using the other to keep hold of the now alert baby, he had expected her to cry but instead she was just looking at him as he moved her back to the way Lori had placed her in his arms. Carol offered the bottle to him and watched him expertly pop the lid off with one hand like he had been doing it for years, like he had his own child and knew exactly what to do. She watched him place the bottle in the tiny girl's mouth and stare down at her, within just over an hour Daryl's feelings and reservations towards that baby had completely changed, he wasn't afraid of her anymore and he didn't doubt his ability to take care of her either.

"You would have made a good Father, you know that?" Carol said gently placing her hand over the hand Daryl used to hold the bottle and lifted it slightly, she let her hand linger over his for a few seconds longer than necessary before pulling back. Daryl grunted at her half statement and half question, he wasn't entirely sure on that, there was no way he would've had the patience to deal with a baby twenty-four hours a day. From the corner of his eye he saw Carol tuck her hands in her lap and examine her fingers. "Lori asked me if they could name her after Sophia."

Daryl looked up at her in surprise but quickly masked it. "Whatd'ya think?" He asked as gently as possible, he didn't want to upset the woman.

She shrugged a little at first before finding it in her to reply. "I think it's a wonderful way to honor my daughter." Daryl didn't miss the tears that filled Carol's eyes, the pain of losing her daughter would always be difficult to cope with and the wound that had been left would always be excruciating. Maybe having another Sophia would help the woman heal just a little more.

"She looks like a Sophia." Daryl offered looking back down at the little girl as she guzzled the last of her milk, he placed the bottle beside him and held her out to Carol, he didn't expect her to laugh as she took her. When Daryl asked what she was laughing at Carol explained he had to burp the baby after she drank, that often made babies sick, at that point in the conversation Daryl scrunched his nose and frowned childishly. "Kids are fu-" He paused and decided not to use the profanity his speech was usually littered with, he saw Carol grin as he did that, he didn't want the little girl to swear and he really did not want her first word to begin with F and end in Ucking. "-gross."

By the look in Carol's eyes he could tell she was missing her daughter, the new baby was not a replacement for her daughter but she gave her someone else to love, someone else to adore and dote on. For the first time in a long time Carol looked happy, she looked like the little girl in her arms was the most important person in the world and right now, she really was.

Silence drew in as Daryl ate and Carol burped the baby, when the girl was sick Daryl looked down at his food and was suddenly put off. He only returned to the rest when Lori arrived to take her baby with her to bed. When Daryl finished he pushed the bowl aside and groaned as he lay down and stretched his arms out behind him, his back was aching not from his scars but from the discomfort of sleeping in a funny position the night before. He was still sharing his 'bed' with Carol, she could have moved into any number of the cells available in the block but instead she just stayed beside Daryl, she felt safer being beside him and he felt better having her there. He hadn't woke up crying once since she'd started sleeping beside him, he was thankful for that, waking up crying was embarrassing.

"You aching?" Carol asked watching him dig his fingers into his back and hiss. He nodded silently and watched Carol shuffle her way in front of him and reach for his shirt buttons making his freeze.

He considered grabbing her arms and stopping her but seeing the yellow mark around her wrist he couldn't do it, Carol very slowly began unbuttoning his new shirt making his heart race and his hands clench in reaction, it was the scariest thing he had ever done. It was like she was peeling away at his armored layers and getting down to the raw stuff, she was making him face his fears and duel his demons, all by pulling his shirt off. By leaning in closely to peel the shirt off his shoulders, by letting her breath fan his face, by keeping their eyes connected despite him wanting to pull away from the intensity.

Daryl felt the cool Georgian air envelope his skin and bring down the heat he seemed to be radiating, Carol gently placed her hand in the center of his chest and firmly pushed him down on to his elbows so he could roll himself on to his stomach. Unlike every time before when she had massaged his back Carol sat over him, her knees stopped either side of his waist as she careful distributed her weight, she didn't want to put too much weight on to his lower back where he was extremely sore almost always. This massage wasn't the same as the others, there was no banter and quick remarks only silence. Intensity. The air was thick with different emotions and feelings, thick with electricity.

Carol took her time on this massage, more so than usual. She paid extra attention to the large scar she seemed drawn too hoping to make him feel better, but mostly because this way she could feel his skin under hers without him becoming suspicious or edgy, she could run her hands across the tainted but still remarkably beautiful skin of the man she yearned for. Seeing him fall asleep with that tiny baby in his arms only made her feelings for him stronger, seeing his softer side made her racing heart beat faster, it was like nothing she had ever felt before. Not with Ed, not even at the beginning of their relationship before they married, it was never the same as how she felt about Daryl. The rough and tumble, no-nonsense, guarded hillbilly made her heart sing and it made her heart sing about only one thing. Love. She loved him. No doubt.


	6. Chapter 6

Daryl sat silently on the bed beside Hershel as he unwrapped his fingers and his knuckles to check them, he could tell by Hershel's frown that there was something not quite right, he had been quite content with the healing state of Daryl's right hand but his left was cause for concern. It was the hand that suffered the worst damage, it was the hand that was the most painful and the hand Hershel paid the most attention too.

Even thought Lori had originally tied Daryl's fingers together with strips of gauze they had still managed to begin setting at an odd angle, Hershel was pretty sure they'd be able to straighten them back out if he tied the gauze a little tighter this time but he couldn't guarantee they would be one-hundred percent fixed. He firmly pressed each of Daryl's knuckles making the redneck swear profusely and bite his lip to refrain from punching the other man, it was when he pressed the knuckle below Daryl's baby finger he felt something unusual. "Daryl, do you have a metal plate in your hand?" He asked curiously, feeling the hand with his thumb and forefinger. Daryl silently nodded. "You should have told me, it may have come out-of-place!" Hershel said watching the man shrug without a word. "Do you have anymore I need to know about?"

Daryl for a moment hesitated and stared down at the floor, there was a reason he didn't like letting Carol touch his face, more specifically the left side. Just like the metal plate in his hand, he had a metal eye socket and four screws holding his face together on the left side, Carol had seen his scars but she didn't know about that and how he got it either. "My face." He replied lifting his right hand to point in the general area in question, he saw the other man reach up as if he was going to touch it and that made him stand so he could pull away. He didn't like anybody touching his face so standing up and moving from Hershel's reach meant there was no way the man could get to him fast enough.

"Sorry." Hershel said raising his hands in surrender. "Let me just bandage your hands back up then you can go." Daryl didn't sit back down after that, he just took a minute step forward and extended his hands letting the vet-come-doctor get on with what he had to before letting him leave. "Let me know if you have any problems with your hands... or anything else, I'll do what I can to help you."

Daryl took a deep breath and gave a curt nod before heading outside, he left the cell block in search of a quiet corner and found himself sat outside in the grass again, he hadn't thought about his titanium parts in such a long time. He hadn't thought about how he got them in a long time either, with all the memories rushing back he felt himself choking up, it was the most horrific thing he had ever been through. More so then being battered and beaten by his father.

God, he hated this emotional shit. He'd opened up to Carol about his past and he'd been learning to accept everyone in their group, he'd been trying to stop being an outsider and fit in but at the same time, it was making him soppy and his usually well-trained emotions were beginning to force their way out of his shell. Daryl didn't want anybody to see him like that again. He cried twice when Rick told him they left Merle chained to a roof, even if Merle was a complete asshole he was still his brother and he had saved Daryl's life more often than not, he was barely able to control the tears back then when he was also a complete ass. He also cried in his sleep because his nightmares were so terrifyingly realistic he couldn't wake until his eyes were streaming and he was whimpering, if all of that happened when he was emotionally closed off and then when he was unconscious what would it be like now? Would he just break down into an inconsolable mess? Would the rest of the group realize he was so emotionally damaged it was probably irreversible, therefore give up on him? Would Carol give up on him?

He didn't want them to give up on him, no matter how often he'd dig his heels in and pretend he hated the way they tried to help him, he had finally gotten to a stage in his life where knew he could no longer hide away. And they had gotten him there, if they deserted him now, it'd be all over for him. He didn't want to be weak and emotional all the time but he didn't want to go back to being aggressive and shut off constantly either, these people were his family now and he didn't want to hurt them anymore. Daryl silently bit his lip and thought about what he'd done to Glenn the day before, Glenn had only asked if he was feeling okay and Daryl responded by throwing something at him, ignoring Glenn and Maggie and then yelling at Carol. He yelled at Carol and she still made sure he had something to eat that night, she still made sure he was comfortable enough so he'd be able to sleep and at some point during the night she'd pulled his sheets up to his chest to keep him warm. She did everything she could to make him feel safe, wanted and comfortable so he had to stop treating her like crap.

Daryl had to stop thinking completely or he'd push himself over the edge and end up having a nervous break down, he couldn't become overwhelmed by feelings because that just wasn't him.

Much like the last time he sat there he felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end alerting him to a presence somewhere nearby, he glanced behind him to see nobody and then back around the perimeter of the fence, he felt like someone was watching him. Someone living. He cast his attention to the guard towers and watched as Rick seemingly got the same feeling and was looking down the rifle scope to see if he could find anything.

The redneck watched Rick slowly lower the scope in disbelief and whistle to Daryl as he ran from the guard tower, Daryl jumped to his feet completely forgetting about his earlier torment and ran up to meet the man. Rick didn't say a word and just grinned signaling Daryl to follow him as he ran down the dirt path to where they'd cut a hole in the fence, Daryl saw as he ran two people on the other side of the fence running towards them too, they definitely weren't Walkers.

"Holy shit." He found himself whispering as he reached the cable tied fence Rick was desperately trying to open again, several Walkers were beginning to close in on the two outside so he had to work faster. "C'mon Rick, or they're goners." He said hopping from foot to foot in agitation his fingers twitching on his knife, it he had to use it he would but he was pretty sure his fingers would snap first. "C'mon Rick!" He yelled this time as the officer yanked at the last cable tie allowing the two to burst through the fence, the two arrivals began slotting Walkers through the chain fence giving Rick more time to tie the fence back up.

Rick stood himself upright and turned to their guests. "We thought you were dead." He said darting forward to grab the blonde woman they'd once left on Hershel's farm. She was beaming as she returned his gesture, squeezing the man tightly. They might have left her on that farm and she may have been a little bitter about it but she had missed her friends. Her family.

Daryl stood and watched the blonde retract herself from Rick's arms and smile at him, she didn't attempt to move in and hug him, she probably still thought he would flip his top if she did. He in return did not attempt to touch the woman because he was too busy watching Andrea's companion who stood with her hand on her blade and a steely look in her eyes, she looked tough, barbaric and savage.

He found the dark color of her skin strangely enticing, he had not met a woman with such a shade. He'd met people from different ethnicities and races, with different skin colors like Morales, Jackie and Glenn but her color was so rich and dark it was strange.

Rick extended his hand to the woman but she blatantly ignored him and continued to stare at Daryl as if he was a threat. Rick dropped his hand and looked back at Andrea placing his hand on her back and leading her up towards the prison. Daryl stood back and waited for the second woman who had been introduced as Michonne to walk on ahead, but apparently she had the same idea and stood staring at him. She didn't want to walk in front of him through fear he'd stab her in the back quite literally and in return he did not want to walk in front of her, through the same suspicion. He refused to budge until Andrea and Rick stopped and looked back at them both glaring at one another with the same iron resolve.

"Michonne, he's not a danger to either of us. So get a move on." The blonde woman called down, the call attracted the woman and she very cautiously made her way towards the prison allowing Daryl to follow far behind.

When the small group reached the prison there was screams of joy and happiness, excitement. Andrea beamed at the tiny baby Lori had bought in to the world and smiled at Carol as they told her she was named after Sophia, they told Andrea that the baby already had a mountain of gifts in one of the cells and that she'd already won Daryl's heart. Andrea glanced at him and grinned with her eyebrows raised, maybe he wasn't as much of a hard ass as he used to be, maybe he had cooled off.

Daryl frowned at Andrea as if daring her to say something, as if daring her to laugh at him. "I met an old friend along the way." She said suddenly and pointedly looking at Daryl. "There is a small town not far from here called Woodbury. Merle is there."

The redneck lifted his head and stared up at the ceiling as he tried to process the information, his brother. His brother was alive, living not so far away, breathing. The man he had mourned and cried for was living and he didn't know how to take it, he should have been overjoyed by the fact his brother was still alive but in the pit of his stomach he felt dread, he felt nausea. Merle was alive and so was his drug fueled rages, so was his racist bad mouth ways and so was his desire to seek revenge on the man who kept him prisoner on a roof.

"He was asking for you..." Andrea said watching the man get to his feet from the spot where he sat on the stairs, he began to wander and pace the floor. His big brother was asking after him, he was looking for him. He now knew where the man was so he could go and look for him, they could be a family again and this time a proper family but if he did that he could not bring Merle back to join the group, but he couldn't handle the thought of leaving the group. The thought of leaving little Sophia. The thought of leaving Carol. His head, his heart was hurting, this was too much for him to cope with.

Daryl walked up the stairs to his perch and began pacing up there too. "Fuck." He whispered find this new information too much to comprehend. "Fuck." Why did she have to mention Merle? Why couldn't Andrea have just allowed him to live in the belief that his brother was dead, he'd mourned Merle and got over his death, but all that grief was seemingly for nothing. "Fuck!" He yelled spinning on his heels in search of something to destroy, something to punch, something to smash in his hands. But there was nothing, nothing he could destroy or punch, nothing he could smash in his hands or even so much as kick without doing more damage to himself.

He let out a shaky breath as he dropped to his knees and pulled at his hair, his eyes were stinging and he felt like he was losing himself again. He didn't look towards her as Carol ascended the stairs and knelt in front of him, as she gently unwove his mangled fingers from his dark hair or as she gently thread her own fingers in his hair. She tugged very lightly unlike the way he had been, the tiny amount of pain helped ground the man it wasn't the same pain he'd experienced as he did when he was abused, it was pain that made him realize it was only her. Even with everyone else around it was a pain that meant it was only them in the room, it was a tug at his armor to get him to tell her what was hurting him. "W-What do I do Carol?" He mumbled. "He's my brother, I got no one else."

Carol shook her head and brushed her fingers through his soft, shiny hair. "I can't make that decision for you, but you've got all of us. We are your other family and we love you too." She whispered pressing her forehead against his and running her thumbs against his scalp, she wanted to tell him she loved him too but she held it in. How she felt about him was not going to affect his decision, he was already conflicted enough and if she was to do that his heart would surely break, he would be destroyed and it would be her fault.

Daryl groaned and let his head fall into Carol's lap, he felt utterly helpless, broken and devastated. His brother had never done anything decent for him other than protect him from his father, he taught Daryl to be tough but he just didn't provide the emotional support he needed, he had to have that level of support nowadays. It couldn't be avoided anymore. Merle would call him a pussy and probably bully him if he found out Daryl had become so emotionally invested in this group. This was who Daryl was now, this was the real him and not the aggressive hot-headed he had pretended to be, the mask he had been wearing had come away to reveal this soft and gentle man who had a sense of vulnerability about him.

Carol slid one hand from his hair down his neck to his shoulders, she very gently rubbed circles in to his back to comfort him, even through his thick shirt she could feel the ridges in his skin. She leaned down and placed a soft kiss on the back of his head, she watched the man's shoulders shake and it was killing her. Carol felt her heart squeeze painfully as Daryl choked a sob, he was breaking in her arms and it was hurting her. She'd never seen the man so lost and in need of another persons help, Carol had never wanted to swaddle and caress the man as much as she did right then. She had to fight with her own emotions at that moment and force herself not to cry, force herself not to feel his pain.

She very quietly whispered reassuring words in to his hair trying to bring him back into check. "It's okay Daryl, you can do this." She whispered still running her fingers through his hair to try to calm him down, she could feel his breath staggering and he was hiccuping. Everybody was looking up at them and their hearts were hurting just as much for him, he was a vital part of their group now and losing him would be awful. He'd cemented his bond with Carol and she would be a mess if he left to find Merle, Daryl had just begun building a bond with Carl who was actually pretty fond of the redneck, he was Rick's second in command. "You're zen remember, breathe Daryl." She said gently rubbing his arm as he attempted to sit up, Carol felt her chest burn as she examined his face. His eyes were red and his face was soaked from the tears that had streamed his eyes, this man needed something good to happen, he needed to smile.

She watched Daryl wipe his face on his forearm and stare down at his hands, part of her wished Daryl would go back to just swearing and getting mad when something bad happened, at least then he wouldn't become so deflated and passive. She didn't like when he'd become shut off and emotionally devoid, it was one of the worst things to sit through. To sit next the man as he silently ate or to lie beside him and watch him stare at the ceiling without saying a word.

"He's my brother." Daryl whispered scrubbing his face with the palm of his hand. "I don't wanna leave you, or the others."

Carol sighed and placed her hands on his warm neck and ran her thumbs along his jaw, touched his chin and then brushed her thumbs against his bottom lip. "Whatever you choose to do, I'll always care about you. Just take some time to think about it." She watched him lift his head and met his eyes, his silver-blue eyes were filled with liquid agony and torment as he shifted forward this time to rest his forehead against Carol's, to seek more comfort.

Daryl gently pulled one of Carol's hands from his neck and pressed it to his cheek, it was the first time he'd ever let anyone touch his face, it was the first time he ever let anybody feel the metal section of his face. Her eyes widened as she handled his face and felt the distinct difference. "What happened?"

He sighed and squeezed his eyes closed. "My dad wer' drunk and wouldn' lemme drive, he crashed 'n' I came outta the car. Crushed ma hand and smashed ma face." Daryl opened his eyes again and saw Carol's eyes reflect his pain.

"You poor man." She whispered brushing his skin as they sat together. He didn't have to say the words for her to know that had been the end of his father, if a single crash could do that much damage to Daryl it no doubt took the life of his vile father. She could tell despite everything his father had done to him part of Daryl felt terrible about his father's death, he probably blamed himself for not making his father let him drive. He sat there in silence and watched Carol brush his face, watched her try and make it better.

He listened to her as she told him everything got worse before it got better, this feeling of hopelessness would eventually go away, he'd stop feeling like he was going to break and go back to being the regular Daryl. His emotional state was just his mind and body's way of dealing with him opening up and acknowledging what he'd been through. She explained to him how when he was finally well enough to get back outside, to go hunting and exploring again he'd feel a million times better. He'd be okay, he'd recover.

"Maybe you should get some rest Daryl, you look shattered." She said finally running her hands down to his. He sat there for a moment their forehead's still touching as he listened to her, he probably should lie down and get some rest but without her lying beside him he didn't know if he could trust his dreams, they'd become horrific nightmares.

He blatantly lied as he looked in her eyes and childishly told her he wasn't tired and he didn't want to sleep, he just wanted her to stay with him. So she said yes, on the condition he lay down and tried to at least get comfortable. She knew he'd fall asleep if she could get him to relax. Carol shuffled towards his bed and lay down on one of the mattresses, waiting for him to do the same, it took a while for his body to respond but he eventually ended up laid down on the second mattress. He was so emotionally spent he'd become sluggish and unresponsive to just about anything other than Carol's voice, at some point Rick came up to the perch to see if there was anything he could do but Carol just shook her head. Daryl had his back to the stairs and ignored any voices he heard, he thought he felt Rick pat his shoulder but he refused to pay attention to him so he couldn't really be sure, he just stayed on his side blankly staring at the woman beside him.

She shifted herself closer so she could touch his cheek again, that must have been why the day he was full of rage, he had slapped her hand away and why he'd hurt her. He didn't want her to touch his face because he knew she would've asked about the terrible car accident he had been in, she'd want to know why he blamed himself for his psychotic father's death and he'd have to try and explain. It was hard enough trying to think about the accident much less explain what happened in detail.

Carol silently watched Daryl lift his hand up and weave his fingers through hers as they rested against his face, he unusually needed her to keep touching him, the contact was keeping him from slipping into his memories. It was the only reason he was still in the room and not back in a dark twisted corner of his mind where people were screaming at him, yelling at him and abusing him. At any other time Carol's heart probably would have raced and she would have been unable to breathe but at that moment she knew he wasn't holding her hand because they had a little thing going on, he was holding her because he was a terrified little child who'd just received some overwhelming and daunting news.

"Try and think about something else." She whispered pulling herself so close to him their body's were touching. Nose to nose, chest to chest, her arm wrapped around his waist . He let his finger touch what was left of the nasty bite mark on her lip, it was now just a tiny purple mark that no longer hurt, he wished he could take it back. There were a lot of things he wished he could take back nowadays but he knew it was impossible.

"I never said sorry fer that." He mumbled touching the mark again to clarify what he meant. Carol shook her head, he didn't need to say sorry she knew exactly how sorry he was, she knew he never meant to hurt her or draw blood from her mouth. At the time he was just scared and she approached him, it was mostly her fault and she accepted that, she knew he'd react badly to her presence but still threw caution to the wind anyway. "I'm sorry, if I could go back and stop ma self I would."

She sighed taking her hand away from his waist to cup his chin. "You can't change that now Daryl, but were passed it, you don't have to worry about that ever again." She was too good for him, too kind. It was then Carol giggled and remembered the joke she'd made once. "The only way you could fix it was if we screwed around."

Daryl smirked a little and chuckled, that kind of joke while they were in such a close proximity could lead to something totally inappropriate but neither of them were too fussed, they always made dirty jokes at each other. It was the lack of sex making them frustrated and extremely dirty minded. "Ya know I'd jus' let ya down. Got no experience wit' that kinda stuff." He replied catching her attention, was he actually considering it? If they started 'screwing around' would he leave to find his brother? Would he stay? Would he take her with him?

"We were all rookies once." She whispered entirely serious, it was then she started to take notice how it felt to have his warm breath against her lips, how his body felt pressed against hers. She could feel his heart beating in his chest and could feel it speed up the same way she was sure he could feel her heart racing, she felt his rough fingertips gliding across her bottom lip. "Daryl..." All it would take was a tip of her chin to join their lips, just a tiny movement to kiss him properly like she had wanted for so long. He didn't say anything for a moment and just stared at her, so many thoughts swirling through his mind and it was obvious in his eyes. "Just do what your heart tells you."

Daryl fidgeted uncomfortably as he pulled his hand away from her mouth and slid it around to the back of her neck. He could do this, she'd given him permission, she wanted it. He... he was pretty sure that was what he wanted too, he wanted Carol. He heard her whisper something about taking his time so he took a deep breath and tried not to act like a nervous school kid about to get his first kiss, which in essence was what this was, besides the school kid part and the first kiss. Their first kiss had been one he forced Carol in to.

Carol could tell he was nervous by the way he started biting his lip, she had wanted to let him make the first move but apparently he wasn't going to be able to do that, so she'd have to. She leaned forward very slowly and pressed her lips against his feeling him take a massive breath in shock and just freeze for a second, Carol knew exactly what to do to get him going, she slowly pulled herself away again making him capture he mouth as he followed her. She wasn't going to get away from him, he wouldn't let her.

At first he was awkward and just seemed to be lifeless but then Daryl's mind seemed to catch up and he parted his lips slightly as he purposely grazed them against hers, feeling the soft plumpness of her mouth seemed to make him that much more eager, he felt a little bad that his lips were so cracked and dry and knew that it couldn't have been the nicest thing to feel but quickly dismissed the thought when Carol kissed him a little harder. She couldn't have been that bothered. He could taste something unusual and unique on her lips that made him go back for more, it made him tilt his head a little to gain better access as he fell into a rhythm she could match, his hand tightened around her neck slightly as she wove her fingers though his hair and tugged. He winced and hissed against her mouth making her giggle as she took in a strong waft of mint and cucumber making her heart skip a beat. They were kissing!

The rough redneck was placing soft and sweet kisses on her mouth, he was holding her as tenderly as he could and making her feel on top of the world. Making her feel like all of his heart-break would be worth it in the end. Carol didn't ever want to stop even as he pulled back slightly to catch his breath she just wanted to smother his mouth again, she wanted that moment to last forever, he stared at her in silence before smiling a little not knowing what to do with himself. Carol watched him twitch and smiled, she leant forward again and placed and innocent kiss on his lips to reassure him he had done just fine, to let him know she was happy.

She didn't expect him to reply this time lifting himself on to his elbow so he was above her, so he could use his other hand to cup her chin with his fingers, he wasn't as nervous the second time. The second time he was prepared as he pressed his lips to the woman's below him, enveloping her mouth with his so he could relish that delicious taste, so he could feel the warmth she was radiating. Carol's free hand gripped at his hip as he smiled against her, he actually smiled and didn't smirk. The kiss was simple and affectionate and as he pulled away she could see a little twinkle in his eye, he wasn't feeling as low as earlier anymore, he felt... he felt happier. For the first time in a few weeks he felt happy, he let his body flop back on to his mattress and stared up at the ceiling with a stupid grin on his face. Making Carol laugh again and shove him playfully, he still felt pretty worn out and it was obvious when he yawned and glanced at her.

"Get some sleep, I'll wake you up in a couple of hours." Carol said kissing his scratchy cheek as she lay next to him.

* * *

**AN/: Sorry the updates are becoming less and less frequent, I've just started a new job so I now only have weekends to work on my updates. I want to say thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, you guys are ace. And if anybody freaks out telling me the car accident part is completely unrealistic or stupid, it isn't if you know anything about Norman he did actually have a car accident in Berlin a few years ago and has a titanium eye socket and four screws! Thought I'd incorporate it in and use it as a way for Daryl to escape his father's evil reign! **


	7. Chapter 7

He could remember screaming, just screaming in pain. He'd never felt anything so intense, his throat was burning for days after that and his voice was hoarse. He could feel his hand pulsing and aching as he shuffled trying to get out, his face... His face felt like it was on fire. The smell of sweet, iron-rich blood lingered in the air, his skin was sticky with the substance.

He had tried touching his eye but the searing pain made him pull his hand away, he had to focus on his breathing before he passed out, he didn't want to look pathetic. If he passed out Merle would find out and tear him to pieces too. The asphalt was hot against his cheek as he just lay on the floor, he'd stopped screaming and just lay there, it was burning his shredded skin. His skin had been torn by the harsh road and had become filled with bits of dirt and shards of glass, there had been voices talking at him but he could not hear them, he was just focused on the wreck.

The 1951 Chevrolet 3100 was no longer a Chevrolet, it was a crumpled and shattered matchbox. No wind shield. Half a bonnet. Missing passenger door... missing passenger. "D-Dad?" He whispered trying to pull himself around but it hurt, somebody was holding him still. "Dad?" His chest squeezed painfully as he coughed, scraping his face against the floor, where was Merle when he needed him? Probably high elsewhere again.

Everything was silent for a moment before the nightmare vanished from his mind and the prison came back in to view, he bolted upright and found himself gasping and panting for breath as he sat on his bed. He didn't know how long he'd been stuck in that horrific dream but he was sweating and his clothes were sticky, the air reeked of salt telling him how bad it was.

Daryl's mind felt foggy and hazy as he stared at the cell door opposite him, the nightmare had been so vivid and realistic it was like he was there again. He could feel the heat of the road pressing against his skin again, his throat felt familiarly scratchy and painful. His hand and his face were aching just thinking about it. Daryl purposely coughed to try to clear his throat and shift the pain, he then very carefully used his right hand to massage the left, the plate was causing a little pain but it was probably just because of the nightmare.

He suddenly thought of his face, not that plate or the pain, but it was wet. Had he been crying again? He looked around and saw that there was nobody around him like they usually were when he had a nightmare. So cautiously like he didn't really want to know, he lifted his hand to his cheek and wiped away the wetness, it didn't feel like tears. Just sweat and grime.

"You alright over there?" Daryl snapped his head around to the voice that had come from the stairs, he found himself looking at the blonde who had arrived just yesterday. "Carol asked me to keep an eye on you, told me about your nightmares." Andrea said, her arms stretched so her hands could reach the railings on either side of the stairs, she looked different to before. Maybe it was because she wasn't suicidal anymore, or that she'd accepted her sister's death and it made her stronger. Daryl grunted and scrubbed his face hissing as he ran over his left cheek, the psychological pain caused by his nightmare was still present in his face. He glanced down at his hands, the gauze was itchy, irritating and was starting to smell funny so he began to untie it. Andrea seemed to notice his trouble when it came to untying the right hand and shifted to kneel in front of him. "What happened?" She asked placing his hand on her thigh as she dug at the knots around his fingers.

Daryl watched her for a moment before looking out to the door that creaked as it opened. "Punched a wall." He said honestly trying not to smile as Carol wandered around downstairs apparently looking for something, she had met his eyes as she walked in and beamed but when Andrea looked at her she quickly busied herself. Daryl heard Andrea giggle as she unwound the gauze from his knuckles. "Not a word t' no-one." He said in a low growl, what happened between him and Carol was his business and nobody elses, he didn't need or want the rest of the group gossiping about them.

Andrea rolled her eyes completely unsurprised by his hostility. "It's fine Daryl." She sat and watched him flex his fingers as much as he could on both hands for a while, enjoying the freedom it provided. "I wanted to say sorry for bringing your brother up yesterday, it was insensitive, I should have waited 'til you were alone and told you. I didn't know you'd get so..." She said honestly trying to meet his eyes as she spoke but he kept them trained on his stiff and achy hands. She regretted telling Daryl about Merle because of the way he just broke down, she didn't know he'd become so touchy and so easily distraught, had she of known beforehand Andrea would have done things different. She would have told him while they were alone somewhere and comforted him herself, it was her mess and she should have been the one to fix it.

The redneck man just shrugged. "Get so what?" He said with a little annoyance in his voice, but that was mostly at himself for losing control and not at her for stating the truth. Yesterday had been a pretty bad day, his day started with him feeling like something awful was going to happen and that he was losing his mind and the day ended by... something happening and him losing his mind. But not everything was terrible. He'd... Carol... It was hard to find the words to accurately describe what he felt at that moment. He was nervous because he'd only ever kissed one other female in his lifetime and that when he was fourteen after that there was a complete dry spell, he was happy that she'd kissed him but was scared of becoming attached because at some point he'd probably lose her and that would kill him, he was embarrassed that he broke down the way he did and couldn't control himself. He had to admit despite feeling embarrassed and ridiculous, off-loading all those emotions and all that hurt made it feel like a weight had been lifted. Like the pain of all those years had just melted away for a while, he wasn't naïve enough to think that was it and he'd be fine from then on but he knew the meltdown had helped the future become clearer. It had at least cleared up some of the fog.

Andrea didn't say anything after that other than the rest of the group were going about their day. Glenn and T-Dog had gone on a supply run, Rick was on watch with Michonne and Maggie something Daryl scoffed at, Lori was with Hershel in the canteen with the baby and the not so childish kids were busy elsewhere. She was about to get up when Daryl dared ask about his brother and where he was... Woodbury, he wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer to his question.

Andrea told Daryl, Woodbury had been a beautiful and almost perfect place where Merle had found a place, just like Daryl had in this group. But if the place had been so wonderfully perfect there was no way Andrea and Michonne would've left, they didn't know they would come across the Atlanta survivors again, so they definitely didn't leave to find them. Something must've driven them away, something awful that Merle would definitely enjoy, hence his staying.

Then Andrea began talking about a man called the Governor and the boxing within a ring of Walkers, she told him about Merle winning the fight but almost getting chewed on. She told Daryl how she sat with his brother and told him about Daryl fitting in with the group, playing the role of hunter, the role of protector, savior.

Merle hadn't scoffed or laughed in her face like she expected, he actually nodded and gave a small smile of approval. It was because he was sober, the Governor had forbidden drugs other than pharmaceuticals in his town.

Daryl sighed and looked down at his hands as he nodded, Andrea told him exactly where to find Woodbury only patting his shoulder in response when he thanked her. Daryl stood from his spot on his bed and slowly followed Andrea out to find the rest of the group, catching Carol's eye again as he left making her fall in behind him, he tried not to think too much about the previous night and just headed for the canteen. Even though they cleared this section of the prison he still kept his hand on his knife in case any Walkers appeared.

Andrea stopped suddenly trying to remember whether she had to turn left or right, as Daryl stopped behind her Carol carried on crashing straight in to his back. He hissed and grit his teeth at a brief pang of pain caused by the collision making Carol immediately apologize, she gently placed her hand on the spot she hit hoping to relieve some of his pain by touch alone, he just shook his head and stepped in front of the blonde to lead them to the canteen. If she had bumped in to him it meant she was probably daydreaming, in this world daydreaming was a good way to get yourself killed, Walkers weren't going to ignore her just because she was off with the fairies.

When the trio reached the canteen they were instantly greeted by the two adults and the baby enjoying their breakfast. Daryl jumped up on to the end of the table as casual as could be and made himself comfortable, using the seats to place his feet on. He glanced over at Lori who was trying to eat as well as juggle Sophia and her bottle so without a word Daryl carefully and a little awkwardly plucked the girl out of her Mother's arms, he placed the baby on his legs and placed the bottle back into her mouth allowing the woman to look after herself for a little while. He heard Andrea laugh again and mumble something about him being totally whipped but he just ignored her, it made him realize just how drawn to this little girl he was, how he wanted to constantly protect her and how sometimes he felt a little jealous if somebody took her away from him. She wasn't even his daughter and he hated the thought of someone taking her from him.

Maybe it was because she was named after Carol's Sophia, and the thought of losing that little girl twice was just too much, so he did everything in his power to protect the new Sophia and stop her from ever getting hurt. He knew nobody would be able to cope with losing another child especially not a baby, someone who was brought in to this world as hope.

"You hungry?" Carol asked stopping beside him to brush Sophia's hand. Daryl shrugged and scrunched up his nose as he did, he hadn't eaten properly in so long he had almost completely lost his appetite, he'd eat what he hunted or what he was given to survive but he'd eat a meager amount and pretend it was because there wasn't a lot left for him. Carol sighed making him glance at her and lower his head back to the baby, he knew he should probably eat more than he did but with every thing going on he never really felt like it. "I think there's some powdered eggs in the kitchen, I could go make you some if you like?" He knew exactly what she was doing, she was testing the water, trying to see if for some reason he was mad at her. Maybe he regretted the kiss and that was why he didn't feel like talking, or maybe he was angry she hadn't woken him up for breakfast, or maybe he was just in pain and was trying to keep it contained. Daryl nodded as a reply and when he met her eyes he could see her looking at his hands and the lack of bandages, she was probably going to nag him to put them back on but he'd had enough and just wanted to feel a little freedom.

He tried not to show her surprise when she just walked away and wandered in to the kitchen, he wasn't used to her not Mother-ing him, it was refreshing but at the same time made him feel uncomfortable. At least when she was bothering him he knew it was because she cared, when she didn't bother him the voice in his head told him awful things, making his confidence waiver and his doubt rise up. He tried to quell that response as soon as it rose, the things his mind kept telling him couldn't be true or she would not of kissed him or spent the past few weeks trying to help him, she cared about him.

Daryl felt the little girl in his arms squirm and wriggle, her feet pressing against his stomach and pushing a little, like she was testing her muscles. He smiled a little bringing her closer so she could have another try. "Why's she all curled up like that?" He asked curiously seeing how her legs would automatically retract into a bent position just like her arms did. Hershel explained how Sophia had been curled up inside Lori for nine months and had no room to stretch properly so she was going to stay like that for a few weeks until her muscles stretched out, he then added how good it was for her to be pushing against Daryl the way she was at such a young age, Daryl didn't know how to respond to that so he just want back to watching her feed.

"Glenn and T-Dog are going to find something for a little celebration tonight." Lori said finishing the last of her breakfast, as she finished little Sophia also finished her bottle and was ready to be burped. Daryl still wasn't sure on how to do that and it must have been obvious on his face because Lori grinned and reached over for her daughter, he ran his finger down the little girl's nose before handing her over again. He didn't reply to Lori's words just nodded and looked in to the kitchen for the woman who was making him something with eggs, it'd probably end up being scrambled eggs but he didn't mind that, he used to make himself that after a particularly difficult day. It was simple and quick, but of course it would taste better with real eggs. When Carol brought his breakfast out from the kitchen he tried to seem grateful but it probably looked more like he was unhappy, he didn't mean to come across like that but the words 'thank you' or 'sorry' were not words that came easily to him, they were words nobody had ever expressed in the past so he'd never learned how to use hem properly.

He never knew whether he should say thank you or just get on with whatever he was doing, he didn't know when he should say sorry for hurting someones feelings or if they were just being oversensitive and needed to man up. Making decisions like those were difficult and made him feel uncomfortable. Daryl took the plate from her hands unsure if he'd unconsciously brushed Carol's hand on purpose or accidentally and mumbled something that sounded like looks good before digging in, Carol sat down on the bench beside his legs opposite Andrea and joined the conversation, they were mostly talking about the baby and comparing stories about their children. Daryl wasn't sure how Carol would cope with the topic and talking about her now deceased daughter so he watched her carefully as he ate. They talked about funny things their children did when they were young, they talked about how Maggie had gotten pretty sick as a child and nearly didn't make it, how Carl would try to wait up every night for his Father to get home from work.

All of that made Daryl think of his childhood. Whenever he got sick he'd just have to battle through it, sometimes he'd be able to find Merle's stash but reading the labels for each drug was difficult so he was taking a gamble with his life every time he took one. He couldn't remember ever doing anything funny that made his father laugh, ever. And he never waited up for his father, he waited up for Merle, to hear him come home so somebody would take care of him for a while. Carol must have seen Daryl go blank for a moment and gently nudged his leg bringing him back to reality, he looked down at the plate and the fork in his hand before looking back at Carol who just nodded to ask if he was okay, he silently nodded as he placed the plate on the table.

"You know Daryl, I've never met a man who eats as little as you do." Andrea said suddenly catching his attention, she was staring at half the plate he'd left.

"You want me to eat all the food?" He replied sharply, he didn't really know why he acted so defensively at that moment he just did.

Andrea lifted her hands in surrender and shook her head making him turn away and stare at a blood smear on one of the walls opposite. "No, I just... expect someone as active as you to... eat a little more." He grunted instead of saying anything else, she was definitely right but he just didn't want to admit it, he'd start getting sick if he wasn't careful. Then he'd have more people on his case constantly checking up on him, that was most definitely the last thing he wanted, he could barely cope with Carol keeping tabs on him all the time much less anybody else. Daryl wasn't sure how long he'd been studying the wall but when he came back to earth every body had left besides Carol who was just returning from the kitchen after getting rid of his plate and in her hand she held a rather delicious looking red apple, she stopped in front of Daryl and dropped it in to his hands, she had seen him eyeing a few of the apples brought back from a recent supply run but never took one like he obviously wanted too, so she made sure to save him the last one. The one that looked the best.

Daryl smiled a little and rolled the fruit in his hands checking it wasn't too soft or bruised, when he was satisfied it was good to eat he bit in to it. "Jesus Christ..." He whispered tasting the tang that made his mouth water in anticipation. "... I fuckin' love apples." Most people complained when an apple was sour or tangy because they preferred the sweeter kind of apples but for Daryl the taste was perfect, if this was the last apple he ever got his hands on he would be completely satisfied. "This'd beat a smoke any day." He said out-loud partly to himself and partly to his company.

Carol raised an eyebrow at him she was surprised to find out he smoked in the past but at the same time she was not surprised, he had such a stressful life before smoking must have been his way of escaping. His way of making his fears and problems just melt away for a while. Carol watched the man take another chunk from the apple and close his eyes as he chewed, she was happy to see Daryl enjoying something as simple as an apple, to see him just... enjoying something. "Sophia used to love apple pie." Carol said in an off-hand remark divulging in the thought of her beautiful daughter.

Daryl smiled sadly as he looked down at the fruit in his hand, he didn't know what so say or do whenever someone brought up Carol's daughter, it made him feel uncomfortable and just a little guilty. He should have been faster when tracking the little girl, he should have rescued her and protected her from the god damn Walker that got her. "I like apple pie." He said a little lamely not wanting to see any kind of bad reaction from her, he couldn't stand the idea of her hurting for her lost daughter.

"Have you made any decisions on, you know... Merle and Woodbury?" Carol said suddenly after a moment of silence, making Daryl freeze and panic slightly. He had tried to avoid thinking about Merle because he didn't want to go through that personal conflict again.

Part of him wanted to go and find his brother so he could make sure Merle was okay after all he did saw off his own hand, he wanted to see what 'Woodbury' was like and why Andrea and Michonne would've left an apparently perfect place, he was curious to find out who the Governor was. But at the same time if he left to find his brother Merle would want him to stay at Woodbury that would mean leaving his family, there was no way Daryl could bring Merle back to the group because Rick would be in permanent danger, he also didn't want to end up on the wrong end of Merle's drug fuelled rages again.

Whatever Daryl chose to do there would be serious emotional consequences, stay with the group and abandon his brother or find his brother and abandon the group. This was going to be a tough, damaging decision, either way it was going to hurt. Daryl shook his head silently and just stared at his fruit.

Carol sighed and rubbed her forehead before lifting her head and forcing a smile. "I'll understand if you want to go Daryl, he's your brother." She said watching him flick the apple core away, almost forgetting they were inside and not outside.

"You know why I don't sleep in no cage?" Daryl said suddenly almost like he'd completely changed the subject but when he finished what he was going to tell her, she knew how it was related. "Merle, shut me in ma wardrobe. Barricaded the doors wer' stuck fer near' a whole day." He said quietly examining his hands, he could finally see how his fingers were a little bent.

Carol silently thought about how it must feel to be locked up by your own brother, to be treated so cruelly by a person who was supposed to take care of him, who was supposed to love him. Why would they treat him the way they did for so long? Why would two people behave so inappropriately towards a child? She had not asked Daryl how old he was when the abuse started or how old he was when it finally stopped because even when it stopped, it never really stopped, physically or mentally. Even after his father's death, Daryl's mind never stopped replaying the things he'd been through and Merle too never stopped verbally and sometimes physically attacking him. When they were living by the quarry Merle would always yell at Daryl, he even gave him the nickname Darylina. He hated that name and he hated the way Merle would use it to degrade him, the way he'd yell it at him in front of everyone to purposely make him look like crap.

Carol watched Daryl who was thinking about the same things, thinking about how scared he was being locked away in a wooden box unable to escape. When he finally got out he had been sat on the floor for nearly 18 hours, he was starving and desperate for the bathroom, his father was unconscious on the sofa downstairs and Merle was lying on his bed staring at the ceiling. Hallucinating. He didn't even remember locking his baby brother in his wardrobe, he didn't remember barricading the wardrobe and didn't really care. That was where his claustrophobia had come from, that was why he would not sleep in one of the cells and why he hated having to stay in the RV.

"Did you ever tell anybody what was going on at home?" Carol asked taking a few steps forward so her knees were touching the bench and there was just a small gap between the pair. Daryl silently shook his head at her question, he didn't know who to tell back then, he felt like nobody would believe him because he was an attention-seeking child. Sure he was attention-seeking but he was always seeking the positive kind that he never got. He would look for praise at home and end up just getting a smack instead. Daryl tensed a little when Carol's hand reached out and touched his knee, his instincts told him to push her away and run, he had to fight his natural reactions and force himself to calm down. She wasn't going to hurt him and he was not in danger, the touch was caring and affectionate not violent and hurtful.

Carol was showing him she cared, the other people in his life may not of cared or shown any interest but she was, she was showing interest and wanted to protect him. The hand on his knee was slightly timid like she was gauging his reaction, Carol was making sure he was not tense because he didn't want her touching him.

After a little internal debate Daryl shifted his hand over hers letting his rougher fingers graze the top of her knuckles, showing affection to the woman was never going to be easy for him but he knew she would be patient with him. Carol was always good to him.

Daryl met Carol's eyes as if he was checking she was okay with the contact, he thought for a moment maybe she was disgusted but the little smile banished that idea. He brushed his thumb over her hand and sighed not sure how to go from there. "Think we should go back 'fore they get some ideas." He said chewing the thumb of his free hand in nervousness. Carol smiled and dramatically rolled her eyes as she used her spare hand to pull his away from his mouth, she knew he wasn't the kind of man for holding hands so she held his wrist, that way he could pull away if he wanted to. He bit his hands far too often, she had noticed he'd even bite his nails in his sleep and Carol had pulled his thumb away from his mouth an awful lot.

"I think Andrea already has her ideas." Carol replied feeling his fingers twitch unnaturally over her hand, they didn't appear to be as painful as they had been before but the shake was a little concerning, how would he use his crossbow if he couldn't hold it still? It wasn't something she should have been concerned with at that moment but she knew hunting was his way of de-stressing, if he couldn't chill out then things were going to get pretty crazy. "But don't worry about the others, what they think doesn't matter."

Daryl smirked, this side of Carol seemed a little rebellious, maybe he had rubbed off on her. She had adopted the rebellious streak he had momentarily lost, once he found it again he knew it would get a little interesting. He didn't want to cause too much trouble though, they were still in Walker territory making too much fun dangerous. "Come on Daryl, let's get out of here." She said very gently tugging his wrist to inspire him to get down from the table, he groaned dramatically and climbed down to stop in front of the woman, she looked particularly good today. She just looked... well.

He didn't know where the sudden burst of confidence came from but as he stood in front of her with Carol still holding his wrist, he felt brave. Without a word of warning he leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, it was almost empowering to feel her reel in surprise, but not a bad surprise it was definitely a good surprise.

Carol was a little shocked by his sudden bout of confidence but she enjoyed it, almost as much as the sweet but tangy taste of the apple on his lips, it was a taste that made her appreciate apples and the redneck a little more. The kiss was nothing more than a few simple, gentle seconds but every moment was incredible. The rushing hearts, the butterflies, the sudden confidence. They weren't holding hands but he was allowing her to keep a hold of him, he was allowing her in again. As Daryl pulled away she could see that familiar twinkle in his eyes much like he had the night before, she giggled and shook her at the smug little grin on his face. "Alright, let's get outta here."


	8. Chapter 8

Daryl felt happily drunk. The whiskey Glenn had grabbed warmed him comfortably until his limbs felt a little like liquid, he scrubbed his face as he dozed by the fire. For the first time since the Walkers hit he actually wanted to fall asleep by the fire, he wanted to be in the little makeshift camp where he felt comfortable and strangely safe, but maybe that was just the alcohol blanketing him in a false net.

Just before the group came outside they had eaten in the canteen and then half of them left to set up the camp, Daryl decided to do a few laps of the perimeter and make sure there were no Walkers roaming around, there was no way a group of drunks would be able to protect themselves from rogue and starved Walkers. He came across a few Walkers on the other side of the fence around the perimeter and tried his hand at taking a few out and realized it was a bad idea as soon as he started, his hand was trembling slightly and his fingers ached right to the bone as he gripped his hunting knife, as he shoved the blade through the fence in to the eye of a male Walker a pain shot up through his arm making him unconsciously let go. As the Walker crumpled to the ground he barely had time to shove his hand through the links in the fence to grab his knife back, he fumbled a little with the knife as he tried to pull it back. It was just as the knife came back through the fence a female Walker lunged forward intending to rip his fingers off with her teeth, the redneck stumbled backwards from the fence until he fell to the ground, leaving him just staring at the form that used to be a living woman.

He listened to the sound of her snapping her jaw and growling as she pressed against the fence to try to reach him, the cold dead eyes of the young woman no longer held an ounce of the person she used to be, just the desire to tear him to shreds. Daryl slowly pushed himself up and focused on his breathing, most of their group at some point had a close call with a Walker and he had more than most but this run-in, it wasn't because a Walker had snuck up on him it was because he'd put himself in danger. Through his stubbornness he tried to take on a Walker knowing his hands were not healed enough to keep a secure hold on his knife, he knew his hands still weren't in the best condition when he was trying to eat the eggs Carol had made him. Just holding on to a fork made his hands shake for a fair few minutes, but Daryl was a Dixon so despite knowing what was best he ignored it and did the opposite.

When he sorted himself back out he put the knife away and wiped his hands on his shirt, through anger and frustration Daryl glared at the hungry woman before pacing forward and kicking the fence full force, the dead woman flew backwards off her feet and landed on her back a few feet away. Ideally Daryl would've liked to go out there and stick his blade in to the bitch's skull to teach her a lesson for messing with him, but that would have put him in more danger.

Daryl's neck burned a little as if someone was watching him. He glanced up at the nearest guard tower and met the newest addition to their group, Michonne. There was something about the woman who didn't quite sit right with him, sure she was a proficient killer and may even be a brilliant hunter but she was mysterious and unusual, she was difficult to communicate with and had an attitude worse than any Dixon he knew.

Michonne was staring at him as if he'd done something wrong, so without a single word he stalked off to find the rest of the group. When he arrived at the edge of the circle his lips twitched upwards slightly at the sight of a blanket laid on the floor with a bottle of whiskey nestled on top, the bottle was a fair size and having not drank any alcohol in a while he knew it was going to get him quickly. Daryl wove through the group, dodging the feet that threatened to trip him in to the fire and settled himself down on to the roll mat under the blanket before wrapping himself up warm, it wasn't a particularly cold night especially with the fire going but he still wrapped up none the same. As he unscrewed the cap of the bottle he looked around at the group taking in the people around him, these were not people he would've associated himself with before the world ended, in fact they were far from his normal thuggish and brutal 'acquaintances.' He'd never go as far as to call those acquaintances friends, they never did anything for him, not like these people did.

These people cared about him, they took care of him even when he didn't want them too so he couldn't fault their dedication or relentlessness. Daryl never would've been seen with a Deputy Sheriff, there was no way T-Dog would've been around and not a chance in hell of him being in the same room as a vet. But there he was with these bunch of people trying to enjoy the starry sky, the burning fire and his whiskey.

He glanced to his right and saw Carol sat beside him staring in to the fire with her arms wrapped around her knees, she seemed to be thinking long and hard about something. She didn't look like she was or had been drinking at any point, she just looked a little sad. The look on her face pulled on his heart-strings something he'd never experienced before, he had never felt like dragging anyone close before to make their pain go away but that was what he wanted to do at that moment, he didn't even care the others would see he just wanted to see her smile again.

"Carol?" He whispered quietly placing the bottle beside him, Carol turned her head to him and gave him a weak smile, she was trying to pretend she was okay but he could see right through that mask. For a moment he hesitated not really knowing what to say or do until he reached for the end of the blanket, holding it up to allow her in, to allow her to sit flush beside him. Carol stared at him in disbelief until her body kicked in to gear, she wasn't going to refuse the chance to get close to the man she loved, especially seeing as he wanted her beside him in front of everybody. The woman shuffled from her spot and moved in close to him, letting Daryl readjust the blanket so she was covered, Carol ended up pressed right against his side their shoulders both touching so she could find comfort. Daryl held his bottle out to her, he wasn't usually one to share alcohol but she looked like she needed to drown her sorrows and escape for a while, Carol held her hand up silently refusing but when he didn't lower the bottle she sighed in defeat and took it. After just a small mouthful she began to choke and thrust it back at him as she wiped her mouth, Daryl chuckled a little and nudged her shoulder mumbling playfully that she was a pussy but she had already stopped paying attention. "What's wrong?" He whispered again trying to hide the question under everybody else's conversation and laughter.

She sighed and shook her head continuing to stare in to the fire, he noticed the fire seemed to bring her solace and peace. But he wouldn't stand for her silently dealing with her troubles, it was his job to protect her and he couldn't do that if she wouldn't talk to him. He very gently moved his knee to bump her leg making her tear herself away from the fire and meet his eyes again, where he silently repeated his question. "It's nothing, I was just thinking how Sophia would have enjoyed being here." She said bumping his knee back like it was some kind of childish game. "It's silly, I shouldn't be thinking about it really."

Daryl shook his head in disagreement continuing with their little game of using their legs to push each other slightly, a way of maintaining physical contact without it looking anything more than innocent play between friends. "She's yer daughter, think 'bout her as much as ya want." He replied in a low voice taking another heavy draft of his alcohol, Sophia was a pretty tough topic for the both of them so he wasn't surprised that despite her earlier choking Carol took the whiskey from Daryl. Neither of them said a word as she drank, he just watched her from the corner of his eye as she huddled closer, letting her head rest against his shoulder like it was meant to be there. It made him uncomfortable at first especially when he felt a few of the others looking at them, he tried to ignore the sensation but found the only way to distract himself was more alcohol.

"Daryl, slow down or you're gonna end up wasted." She said grabbing the bottle as he brought it to his lips again, he lowered it slowly feeling embarrassed he let the others freak him out, he didn't have any reason to get worked up, it was Carol who initiated the touch and he could stop it any time he wanted. Not that he would want that, sure he was a little frightened and nervous because people were looking at him as he allowed the woman to rest against him, but at the same time he wanted to be normal just like everyone else so he had to get used to this. He didn't feel too bad when one of the group touched him nowadays, they'd place their hand on his shoulder and even if he dropped his shoulder a little he rarely pulled away or freaked.

Daryl placed the bottle on the ground and met her eyes, she was staring up at him with a look in her eyes he didn't recognize and it made him uneasy, he didn't like not being able to read her. It was like throwing him head first in to deep water and just hoping he could swim, hoping he'd understand the message she was trying to convey. She was probably just as surprised as him that he allowed her to show affection in front of the others, she probably expected him to brush her off and leave but he didn't, he wanted people to know she belonged to him now. She was his. He looked around at the group again and saw the how Lori was sat with Rick and Sophia, Glenn was with Maggie, Beth was sat beside Carl, T-Dog and Andrea were catching up along with Hershel. Michonne was the only person not sat with the group because she wasn't yet part of it, she was an outsider Andrea brought in who the group didn't quite trust yet. She was on watch in one of the guard towers while the two prisoners Axel and Otis were walking around the prison fences on guard.

The redneck found himself looking at the couples more than anything. Now that Sophia was around Rick and Lori's relationship had almost healed, they seemed more in love than ever but unlike Maggie and Glenn they were much more discreet when showing their dedication to each other, there were little hand touches and twinkling eyes, once or twice a kiss on the cheek but mostly they were private. Glenn and Maggie on the other hand were all over each other when ever they had a spare moment, if they weren't making out every two minutes they were up in the guard tower having a little alone time.

He wasn't sure if he'd ever be like either of the couples. Carol was important to him and they were divulging further and further in to what was considered by a normal person, a relationship, but he was not a normal person. He was socially awkward and had very little knowledge of acceptable and unacceptable behavior so how was he ever going to know the appropriate way to behave in a relationship like the one he had with Carol? Sure, if he was doing something wrong she'd let him know, but eventually she'd get bored with telling him what not to do and decide to call it off. Then he'd have more guilt and regret to deal with. Whether he knew what to do or not he did know there was a certain way he was never going to behave, the same was Ed and his father did. He'd never lay a hand on her, he'd already hurt her once and promised himself he'd never do anything like that again, he'd never physically hurt her like that again and he would never abuse her the way they both had been abused before. Even if things between them didn't work out, he'd still try his hardest to treat her right.

Daryl let out a deep breath as Carol's hand slipped under the blanket to rest on his thigh, he knew it was the most innocent of touches and that she just wanted some comfort but it still made his mind go blank and his heart race in a way that wasn't through excitement, it was a fleeting moment of fear. He held his breath for a moment wondering if anybody else could see what was going on, even though there was a blanket covering them he felt like they were watching their every move making Daryl more nervous than before.

A moment of thought made the man push the hand away, he shifted his eyes back to the fire so he didn't see the hurt look on her face, or any anger. As soon as he moved her hand away he felt lonely and missed the contact, but Daryl couldn't handle the thought of the others knowing she was touching him in any way, he couldn't deal with the rest of the group knowing he'd let her get under his skin.

"You don't have to keep hiding away, you know." Carol said gently in his ear making him turn his head away from her to look at a particularly interesting blade of grass. Carol was right, he should not have been afraid of the contact but nonetheless he was.

He shifted uncomfortably and grit his teeth as her fingers grazed the side of his leg again, she was persistent, he could give her that. If she could persist in this then maybe he could too. Carol was careful at first pretending to take an interest in the groups conversation over the fire as she lightly ran her fingers over the side of his leg, she was careful to gauge his reaction and see how much he could take, if she pushed him too far he'd flip out and that could be dangerous especially with the amount of whiskey he'd already drank and the fire in front of them.

Her fingers ghosted from his hip up to his knee and back, each time making the touch a little heavier so he could get used to the contact and come around. Carol could see Daryl's hands twitching around the neck of the bottle he was clutching, with the fire lighting up the darkness she could see his jaw line set hard as he tried to stay in control of whatever he was feeling. Carol's fingers splayed up his leg close to his knee and just stopped there making Daryl's breath stagger as he ran his fingers through his hair, he was freaking out and she could see it. "Daryl..." She whispered. "Calm down, you're scaring yourself."

He snapped his head back in her direction with a deep-set frown on his face. "I ain't scared, maybe I don't want ya t' touch me!" He snarled angrily, he didn't like it when anybody pointed out his feelings and he certainly did not like when somebody else could accurately point out how he was afraid. Carol met his cold hard glare with just as much resilience, she knew he was throwing up his barriers to protect himself.

"Fine." Carol said bluntly taking her hand away and tucking her hands between her knees under the blanket, she turned her attention to the other man sat beside her and engaged in a conversation with Hershel completely ignoring Daryl. Or that was how it seemed to him, she was in fact taking note of every moment and every angry breath, she tried not to make it obvious she was doing this on purpose. It was all part of her plan. Daryl would let the thought fester in his mind until he was so mad he'd either storm off or do something to her that pushed his boundaries, maybe he'd grab her hand or wrap his arm around her shoulders.

Daryl sat beside Carol in complete silence holding his whiskey bottle like it was the most valuable thing he owned, he was mad. At himself for getting scared. At Carol for knowing his turmoil. At his father and his brother for making him this way.

He quickly turned around to her and saw the woman as she laughed and giggled with the others, leaving him sat practically alone and furious. He was angry she was ignoring him but even more pissed off by the way she touched Hershel's arm as they spoke. Carol was really dangling herself in his face and treading on precariously thin ice as she did.

Daryl groaned loudly catching Carol's attention, she turned to the man as he sat with his head in one hand, the other let go of the bottle and slipped under the blanket where his hand met hers. Carol didn't grab his hand or force him to move any faster than he wanted too, she just let him take control, let him either take her hand or pull away again. Their finger tips touched very lightly for a second, the ends of his fingers were rough and calloused but she didn't care, Carol liked the way it felt. She liked the way Daryl's hands had been toughened by years of taking care of himself, she liked knowing that he could take care of himself despite never being taught how to.

Their fingers carefully slipped in to each other, they only intertwined a very small amount before his knuckles began to ache, his fingers felt remarkably warm as she held them in her own. It was a big contrast to his now frosty attitude, he hadn't behaved this way towards her in a long time, she hadn't seen his colder harsh-hearted side in a while. Carol felt Daryl tense when Rick spoke to him, it took a while for Daryl to respond to the sheriff's words but when he finally did his barriers seemed to lower again and he began to become himself.

As the night moved on the atmosphere seemed to become lighter and everybody was laughing and having a great time, they hadn't felt this good since the CDC that was before they knew it was going to explode, the day they walked in and found hot water and proper food was the best day of their lives since the apocalypse. The group seemed happy and at peace for a little while like they had absolutely nothing to worry about, like there were no Walkers and no worries about food or children or people getting sick. They just had this moment and nothing to worry about.

Daryl had eased up and was much less freaked out by the time darkness really set, his hand had relaxed in Carol's and even though he was not a man for holding hands and public affection he seemed okay with it, he wasn't clinging to her hand or holding her tight he just let his hand rest in hers. It was like despite being almost terrified of commitment he had got over it, he'd dealt with the fear of her touching him, or maybe it was just the alcohol loosening him up. Daryl squeezed her hand before smiling.

She watched Daryl get to his feet and laughed when he staggered a few feet narrowly avoiding tripping over Glenn's legs, he turned back to Carol and held the empty bottle out to her. He hadn't drunk properly in a long time and was surprised by how intoxicated he was, it was probably because of how little he'd eaten today where as everyone else had eaten more than him and drank much less. The group laughed at him and Rick yelled something about him going soft, at the CDC Daryl had drunk them all under the table, but now he had become almost diluted. Daryl couldn't handle as much as he used to.

"I think it's time to call it a night." Rick said getting to his feet with his baby in his arms, they didn't know exactly what time it was but judging by the stars in the night sky it was pretty late, they were going to be busy in the morning with supply runs and making sweeps of the prison so they had to be in a relatively decent state. "I think it's time for Daryl to go to bed." Rick chuckled patting the man's shoulder as he walked past, even the gentle tap made Daryl stumble, Rick caught the man with one hand stopping him from falling over and getting hurt. Carol was the next person to stand up grabbing the blanket and taking the empty bottle out of his hands, Maggie took them both from her hands so Carol could help the slightly drunk man. She placed her hand on the small of his back and led him towards the exit of the yard, he didn't remember ever getting so drunk before, it took way more than one bottle of whiskey to ruin him usually.

They got just a few feet before Daryl slipped on the grass and grabbed her arm to hold himself up. "Come on, the quicker we get you back inside, the longer you'll have to sleep it off." Carol said pulling him up, she threw his arm around her neck and wrapped an arm around his waist to hold him steady. She giggled when he turned to her and beamed, it was not normal to see him smiling the way he was, but it was nice to see. He looked relaxed.

"You lemme get drunk, supposed t' keep me sober!" He said loudly waving his free hand wildly as they staggered towards the prison. "Why'd ya ge'mme drunk?" He slurred pointing a finger as he playfully accused her of inappropriate behaviour. "Ya tryin' t' take advantage of me?" He asked laughing at her as he clung to the fence and she pulled the door open, Carol turned back to him and giggled herself.

"Me, take advantage of the big bad Dixon?" She replied taking his arm again and pulling him up the stairs in to the prison they only got as far as just passed the door before Daryl shoved the woman against the wall, staring her straight in the eye as he held his hands either side of her head. "How would I ever take advantage of you?" She asked lifting one hand from beside her to brush her fingers against his metal cheek, she watched him close his eyes and lean in to her touch, he took a deep breath and leaned forward so their forehead's touched.

Daryl's even breath fanned her lips giving her arms goosebumps, she liked Daryl when he was this way, when he showed her affection and was not afraid of her. She liked Daryl when he was the real Daryl. Carol tipped her head slightly so their noses brushed, his eyes opened again letting her see back in to his ice blue eyes, his eyes were sparkling probably through because of the amount of whiskey in his system giving him false joy.

"What's going on here?" A voice said suddenly interrupting them, Daryl yanked himself backwards away from Carol so fast he stumbled in to the wall behind him, he glared at the person who had stepped in and found himself looking at T-Dog, Glenn and Maggie. "Are you two...?" T-Dog didn't finish his sentence as he pointed between the pair looking back at those behind him with a smile on his face, when he turned back to Daryl, the redneck looked far from impressed by their arrival.

"It's none your fuckin' business!" He snarled pushing himself off the wall to step towards T-Dog, Carol grabbed Daryl's arm to stop him from getting in to T-Dog's face, Daryl whirled around quickly when she grabbed him and met her eyes. "Le'go of ma arm." He said through grit teeth, it wasn't like the last time when Daryl bit her, this time he kept his emotions under control.

Carol was not going to back down from this confrontation, if she let go he would flip out at the others, she rather he went crazy at her and not everybody else. Carol could forgive him if he was rude, the others may not. "You need to calm down," She whispered quietly not letting go of his fiery eyes. "T, maybe you should just go." She said louder to the other man so they could avoid a fight. The last thing the group needed was the night ending on a sour note because Daryl and T-Dog had gotten in to a fight, Daryl's hands would end up much worse tan they already were and would probably be permanently damaged. Permanent damage meant absolutely no hunting and one very unstable Dixon.

Maggie seemed to get the message from Carol and ushered the men down the corridor back towards the cell block, leaving the apparently blossoming new couple alone with each other, so the male half of the budding pair could bring his emotions back to where they were supposed to be.

Daryl let out a sigh of frustration and brushed Carol's hand off his arm, it wasn't an aggressive push, it was gentle because he thought she'd be disgusted by his little outburst. "I didn't want them t' find out like that." He said staring at the floor in front of her feet, Daryl didn't really want the group to know what was going on with him and Carol much less have them wander in on them during an intimate moment, it was nobody elses business but now it was too late.

Carol stepped forward and placed her hands on the side of his face, lifting his head to see the slightly deflated look on his face. "I know you didn't. But we can't do anything about that now." She said ignoring whoever had just appeared down the end of the corridor listening to them, she saw them through the corner of her eye but focused on Daryl, she didn't like seeing him go from so care free to defeated in just a few minutes. She brushed her thumbs across his cheekbones, she felt almost drawn to his face since she learned about his metal socket, the feeling of his cheeks varied on either side. One side felt natural while the other side was harder and his skin was a little tighter.

Carol saw Daryl's eyes flick towards the person at the end of the corridor and then back to her, he smirked again but it quickly died out as realisation set in. He slowly turned his head towards the end of the corridor and took a deep breath, Carol followed the man's gaze and gasped. How the hell had it got here? Daryl's hand scrambled for his hunting knife and pulled it out just in time to take out the Walker who had shuffled towards them, he barely managed to get the knife in the Walker's skull to stop it taking one of them out, his shaky, painful hands combined with the whiskey in his body made aiming for the Walker's brain harder than usual.

The pair watched the Walker fall in a crumpled pile to the ground, Daryl kicked it away, annoyed his time with Carol had been disrupted a second time in less than ten minutes. He was about to suggest heading back to the cell block when he heard something familiar that made his blood run cold. A deep grumbling groan. Followed by several more deep moans.

"Shit..." Daryl whispered grabbing Carol's hand, there was no way the two of them could take out that many with no crossbow. He looked up and down the corridor and reached for the handle of the nearest door, he found himself looking in to a dark empty store cupboard. "Come on." He said dragging her in to the store cupboard and slamming the door.

He wished he had a torch.


	9. Chapter 9

"Daryl, sit down before you fall down." Carol said from the floor watching Daryl pace the tiny cupboard, he could only take three steps before having to turn around and go back. She'd been trying to calm him down for an hour but his claustrophobia was beginning to set in and she couldn't help him, the only thing she could do to protect him was take his knife away. They were secure in the cupboard and there was no way any Walkers could get in but with him being so edgy and freaked he kept wondering if he could fight his way out, there were still too many Walkers outside the door by the sound of things and they'd kill him in seconds, so she took his knife away with a little effort to keep him from trying to break out. He'd never consider going out without a form of defense. Carol didn't have time to worry about feeling claustrophobic herself with the way Daryl was going.

With all this pacing and his frantic behavior the alcohol had all but worn off, it was the quickest sobering session she'd ever seen. They'd got used to the dark pretty quickly so Carol could see how he glanced down at her, his eyes wide with panic and fear, he was thinking about being locked in his wardrobe again. She just knew it. Daryl hadn't said a word since he dragged her in here and it was unnerving, it wasn't like usual where he just didn't talk because that was part of his personality, it was because he was traumatized by having to hide out in a six-by-four cupboard. Daryl's fingers were clenching and unclenching tightly which must have been agony but he hadn't noticed, he kept rubbing his face with the back of his fist making the skin become tender through the constant friction, within the first ten minutes of being in the cupboard he'd chewed his thumbnails right down. "We gotta get out." He said mostly to himself.

Carol didn't know what she could do to comfort the man so she said nothing and just let him pace the cupboard like a caged animal, she didn't even consider touching him because in such a confined space he could do a lot of damage, especially if his thoughts let him to believe she was somebody else like his father or Merle. She'd be as good as dead if that happened.

She didn't know when they were going to get out, she didn't know if the group had realized they were missing or if T-Dog told Rick what he saw and they assumed Daryl and Carol were off on a romantic rendezvous. If the group thought that then they could be there for at least a day, maybe longer. Daryl was going to go crazy by then.

"You have to save your energy Daryl, you're a hunter you know what it takes to survive." She said in hope his brain would kick in to gear, as if he knew what she was thinking he stopped pacing and sank to the floor beside her, he brought his knees to his chest and hugged his legs tightly. She hated moments like this, seeing a man who was so strong and determined, end up looking like a lost child. His head lay on his knees so he could look at Carol, she was the only thing that was keeping him grounded, but it was barely enough. "You wanna talk about it?" She asked reaching over to run her fingers through his hair and calm him down, he momentarily winced as if she was going to hit him and then realized where he was. "Tell me everything you remember about that day, it'll make you feel better."

The pair sat in silence as he considered admitting what'd happened to him as a child, it took a lot for him to start the conversation but once the words started they just kept flowing. "D-Dad wer' drunk and I... I wer' hungry. The only thing we had in t' house wer' Merle's but I wer' so hungry, I jus' ate it, never used t' get so mad when I ate his stuff. He wer' high and I couldn't fight back. Jus' twelve and he wer' twenty-three, dragged me inta ma room and shoved me in ma closet, used somethin' to barricade it. Don't remember what, never been so fuckin' scared, thought I'd be in there forever." He said honestly, he was never usually one to admit he was scared.

Carol listened to Daryl as he partly rambled over his brother, telling her some of the things that went through his mind as he sat in his wardrobe, like how he thought he was never going to get out or what Merle might have taken to get him so high. He remembered needing the bathroom so desperately, but the worse thing he remembered was how he kept kicking the doors and the side of the walls but nothing happened for a long time, making him break down in to hysterical tears. Much like he had before. Daryl couldn't remember how he got out of the wardrobe, he was so dehydrated and hungry his mind started hallucinating, he had no idea if how he thought he got out was actually true.

Carol sighed sadly allowing her fingers to run from his hair to his neck, she knead the back to both comfort him and help him relax. Daryl's arms appeared to loosen around his legs a little. "I like it when you're honest with me." She said quietly meeting his eyes for a moment, he seemed calmer on the outside but his eyes told her exactly how he felt inside. That was always how she knew his feelings, through his eyes, they were the two things that betrayed him when he was trying to be tough. Like back on the farm when he beat that Randall kid for answers, he pretended he didn't give a shit, but she knew Daryl was so mad the group made him do the dirty work all the time. They made him beat a kid the same way he had been beaten before, continually punched until he was black and blue and bloody.

Daryl held her gaze before sitting up, letting the back of his head touch the wall. "What'd you see in me Carol?" He asked suddenly after a period of silence. "I ain't good fer you, I ain't good fer me or nobody. Why'd you even give me the time of day?" Daryl did not believe in himself, he thought he was worthless.

Carol watched the man beside her as he stared blankly forward, mentally bracing himself for any blows she would give him, any pain he was going to face. He was expecting the woman to either beat him or verbally degrade him in to the ground. "Daryl, you are an exceptional man and that is why I care." Carol said as vaguely as possible, she knew if she started listing off all the things she liked about him, he would become a little uncomfortable. The atmosphere would become pretty awkward in just a few moments, but Daryl's silence told her he really wanted to know. Needed to know. "Alright. You've got this light that shines through you, you used to be miserable and angry all the time but now you smile a lot more, I like seeing you smile."

Instinctively in an attempt to please Carol, Daryl smiled weakly, she did not fail to notice. "That it?" He asked, he did not expect her to say anything else.

"I like the way you can look after yourself, you don't rely on anybody or expect any one to carry you, even when you need them too. You're too independent and stubborn for your own good, it's kind of cute." Daryl scoffed and rolled his eyes at the word cute much like Carol expected, but that was the only word she could think of, every time she saw him marching back with a catch she wanted to run down and squeeze the life out of him. I like that you express your anger and disgust straight out, you don't bottle that up, I wish you'd do that with all your emotions but..." Carol trailed off the end of that topic and picked up on another, his emotions was not a topic they should discuss while stuffed in a cupboard. She watched Daryl as he played with his fingers, now he was slightly calmer, the pain seemed to be seeping in. She wished there was something she could do for him to make his pain go away, but there was nothing long-term, Daryl would be in pain for the rest of his life. That was a horrible prospect for any one to face, a life of constant pain and even though most of the time he could cope with it, there must have been days where the pain would become unbearable. "I like that you carry around a crossbow, I don't know anybody else in the entire state of Georgia who carries one of those things and I like the way you don't let anyone else touch it, like it's a child. Your child."

Daryl scoffed again but smirked. "You know I ain't good with kids."

That was a lie and they both knew it. The way Daryl had rushed Carl out of the prison during Lori's labor said as much, the way he distracted Carl with a pack of cards showed how hard he was trying to get people to like him. "...That's not true. You may not have any experience with them but the way you are with Sophia, its beautiful." Carol paused for a moment and took a deep breath, shifting her body so their shoulders were pressed together, their knees touched and her hands were in reaching distance of his. "You looked for my Sophia day and night, I didn't ask you to, even when you were hurt and would've done more damage to yourself than good. You were still looking for her. I like that you know all about the Cherokee Rose, that you aren't as tough as you think you are, that nobody else would ever be able to say these things to you without you trying to shoot them."

Daryl chuckled and met her eyes for just a second. "It'll take some time fer me t', ya'know, believe all this crap you keep tellin' me." He whispered honestly, he wasn't used to all this caring and sharing business, he wasn't used to being told he was a good guy. "Not like ma daddy ever cared enough t' tell me." Carol nodded silently, she knew that despite him acknowledging he was better than he thought, he wasn't ever going to believe it fully. There would always be the shadow of doubt in his mind, he'd spent probably his entire life being beaten and degraded so she expected it. After all Carol knew what it was like to be degraded and abused, but nowhere near as badly as he was.

"It isn't crap." Carol replied gently bumping his shoulder with hers, Daryl looked at her before shoving her playfully with his hands, he forgot for a moment that they were both trapped in a tiny room and that his knuckles were still pretty messed up. He immediately retracted his hands from Carol and stared at them, he hadn't put the gauze on again after Andrea untied them which was probably why they were aching so much. But they weren't aching anywhere near as much as his back was, he could really do with lying down and stretching out but there was no room and the stone floor wouldn't have done him any favors. "You hurting?" Carol asked gently seeing him fidget and constantly shift his shoulders.

"Mmm..." He mumbled letting his eyes close as he frowned through the pain, Daryl didn't like the idea of Carol constantly massaging his back. Not that he didn't enjoy it, he loved the way it felt and he loved the way that for just a few hours, he felt completely stress free. His problem with it was she was placing him in her debt, he felt like he'd have to return her loyalty and he didn't know how, he didn't know what he could do to make up for the decent things she'd done for him. But as soon as her hands reached for him, he forgot about it, he just wanted to feel her hands tracing his skin.

The woman told Daryl exactly what to do, because he couldn't lie down, she made him shuffle forward and sat in behind him as he peeled his shirt off. As soon as the shirt was removed Carol's hands found his skin making him sigh, her hands always had the perfect temperature for his damaged skin, it always relieved his aches and pains for a while.

Daryl groaned as her fingers dug in to his neck, it made his arms feel heavy and his fingers tingled slightly, the feelings a simple massage could provide were insane. He had never felt so relaxed. It gave him something other than his claustrophobia to think about, he didn't have to think about Merle or his father either. The freedom felt good.

"You're like an angel in disguise. An angel in a really great disguise." Carol said as her fingers knead the muscles joining his neck and shoulders, his moans reverberated off the walls making her smile, she leaned forward and planted a gentle kiss on his skin. He tensed for a moment before shifting a hand from his lap on to her knee.

He chuckled a little and squeezed her knee. "I'm no angel, real rubbish angel." Daryl replied remembering the comment about his leather jacket and the angel wings on the back, he wasn't ever going to believe he was an angel, no matter how many times she was going to tell him. Carol shook her head knowing he couldn't see it, she hated the way he doubted himself.

"You are my angel and that's all that matters, no matter what anybody else thinks and what your mind tells you, your mind doesn't know the truth." Carol said trailing her hands to his back and rubbing circles in to his skin, each time her thumbs ran across the painful ridges in his back trying to make it better. It took a moment for the words to sink in to Daryl's brain before he looked over his shoulder to the woman, sometimes she said things that he just didn't understand, how the hell could she consider him an angel? He had done some pretty awful things in the past and during the apocalypse, so he was far from angelic. Carol stopped moving her hands when Daryl hissed through his teeth, she tried to ignore the pain she felt in her knee but was unable to stop the harsh squeak from escaping her mouth.

Daryl's hand quickly released her knee and he jumped up pressing himself against the farthest wall away from the woman. He'd hurt her again. He didn't mean it, he never meant to hurt her, it was just a natural reaction to his pain. The cold stone wall felt incredible on his burning skin but Daryl couldn't enjoy it, he could only stare at the woman he'd just hurt. "Shit... I'm sorry... I didn't mean it. Fuck. I'm sorry." He rambled scrubbing his face with the heel of his palm again, it wasn't often Daryl apologised for something he did unless he really meant it.

Carol watched as his hands began trembling again and he started to become frantic, his mouth still spurting out apologies as he stood on the spot. He had isolated himself from Carol as much as possible in the tiny cupboard, to prevent himself from doing any more damage like he had last time.

The woman slowly got to her feet and raised her hands showing him she meant no harm as she approached him, Carol kept her hands raised as she shuffled close enough for their feet to touch, she placed her hands either side of his waist and let herself meet Daryl's eyes. "Just relax. It was an accident." She whispered gently allowing her body to fall against his. Her chest against his bare chest as he stood frozen in fear and worry, Carol didn't back down when his hands grabbed her arms, Daryl considered pushing her away but he changed his mind at the last moment. He held on to her as she thread her arms around his waist, she loved the feeling of his skin against hers and loved the way he allowed her touch his most sensitive parts. Carol could feel Daryl's muscles spasming under her hands, but she was more interested in tracing his spine and enjoying the way his muscular body curved and filled out in places that Ed's body never did.

Carol silently wondered how long they were going to be stuck in that cupboard. As much as she enjoyed the closeness with Daryl, the way he was reacting to the slightest thing was worrying, she wanted things to go back to normal instead of him jumping constantly at the sight of his own shadow. Part of Carol regretted making Daryl tell her about his past because it had messed up his mind and made him unstable, but another part of her was so glad Daryl told her. Despite several emotional outbursts he had actually become more passive, it was almost like he had become domesticated and no longer felt the need to violently react to everything. Daryl was no longer afraid of her touching him, he still had reservations about how often or what kind of touches they were but it was work in progress, the fact that he had not shoved her away already was a good sign.

She held on to her arms for a little while after that but let his face fall in to her neck, the warmth he found there was comforting and helped him melt back in to her hold. Daryl let his hands slide from her arms to her back and then snugly fit his own arms around her waist. "Overreacting again." He said quietly against her skin, he felt slightly embarrassed by the way he had just jumped up, but he'd done it to protect her. He would not be able to live with himself if he had bit her again. "Hope Rick notices were missin' soon." Daryl said pulling Carol a little tighter to his body, he was trying to ignore the fear building up in his stomach as he acknowledged where he was and how he got there. "Ma fault we're stuck here." He said, even though Carol couldn't see his face she knew he'd be scowling slightly in frustration at himself.

"How is this your fault Daryl?" Carol replied as her cold skin brushed against his most painful scar, she felt his knees give out for a second but he quickly regained his stance, sliding in to the corner to keep himself propped up. "You didn't ask for the herd to run through the prison and you didn't let them in."

Carol pulled back from Daryl so she could see his face, there she could see the feeling of guilt in his eyes, he really believed their situation was his fault. "I shouldn'ta pushed you 'gainst the wall, shoulda jus' carried on walkin'." He whispered dropping his head back against the wall. "Shouldn't of drank the whole bottle, we coulda been safe back in t' cell block." Carol attempted to make Daryl feel better after that by telling him it was not his fault but he would not accept it, he kept telling her she was denying the truth and couldn't see what had really happened. She found herself extremely frustrated by the way he kept shutting her down, he would not listen to any of her reasons and continued to blame himself.

When Daryl said it would take a while for him to start believing in himself, she didn't think it would be so difficult to get him started. No matter how many times she tried to convince him he was not to blame he just would listen, Carol even told Daryl she liked the way he shoved her against the wall. He didn't do it because he was furious, he did it because in his drunken state he wasn't so worried about showing his feelings, he wanted to shove her against the wall and kiss the life out of her but they never managed to get that far. Carol giggled when she said they could screw around in the cupboard with out anyone realising, a strong blush crept up Daryl's neck on to his cheeks at the thought, even if she could not see it, Carol could feel his face radiating heat.

They stood together for a few minutes not speaking allowing Carol to think about how much Daryl had changed since they met. When he arrived with Merle they were both aggressive and treated everybody like crap acting like they ran the place, most of the time Merle was off his face so Daryl would stalk around after him to keep an eye on him or he'd be off hunting, saying nothing to anybody ever. Behind closed doors Merle would treat Daryl like complete shit and Daryl would just take it, letting his brother do whatever he wanted without a word. When Rick arrived on the scene and told Daryl his brother was missing, Carol felt a little bad because that was somebody's brother and seeing Daryl cry made her uncomfortable, but it didn't have the same effect back then as his tears did now. Back then when the man had cried for his missing brother and tried to slice Rick's throat with his knife, Carol thought he was just an asshole redneck with a temper, she didn't know he was always so angry and riled up because he'd been abused to the point anger was the only emotion he knew. It kept him safe from people who might want to hurt him and it'd deter anyone who tried to become his friend, because in the long run, friends were just going to hurt him too.

When they lived at the quarry, Daryl meant nothing to her and she meant nothing to him. The group then moved to Hershel's farm, losing Sophia along the way, Daryl had never stopped searching for her. Even though Sophia was nobody to him, he knew what it was like being lost in the woods so he had to look for her, no child should go through the trauma of getting lost. Seeing Daryl search for her missing daughter every single day gave Carol hope and even though the pair did not speak, his searching for the girl had formed a bond between them, a silent connection Carol had with the man nobody understood.

Without Merle constantly leaning over him and telling him what to do, Daryl could finally develop his own personality and feelings without them being dictated, he still kept himself pretty isolated from the group but slowly he opened doors for them. Most people didn't see the real Daryl for quite some time, but the moment he stood up and decided to look for Sophia in the dark because Carol was crying, she knew the real person behind his act. He was a man who through habit yelled at anyone who got too close, but at the same time he was also a man who carried about the safety of missing children, he just wanted to find her and bring her back. He didn't like seeing people cry and not being able to ignore it or fix it, hearing Carol cry for her missing daughter because she loved her really hit home for him, nobody had cried for him when he went missing. If Carol cried it meant her daughter was her world and seeing Carol's world ripped from her hands was like Daryl being told he was shit by his father, it stung like a bitch and Daryl would give anything to make it stop.

The day Daryl stumbled back in to camp covered in blood and was then shot by Andrea was when their relationship changed, they were not quite friends, but Daryl had done every thing in his power to bring back Sophia's doll. Even though he was covered in his own blood and had a hole in his side. Despite Daryl not bringing her daughter back that day, Carol was eternally grateful, because with him he brought hope. Daryl completely freaked out a few days later when Carol told him not to go looking for Sophia, sure she wanted him too but he was so badly injured he couldn't walk properly, if he had fallen down a ravine again and not made it back up then Carol would've lost two people she cared about.

When Daryl finally realized Carol was right he apologized by bringing her a Cherokee Rose and the legend behind the rose, she had absolutely no idea he was so interested in the history of Georgia and it was a pleasant surprise, the flower didn't bring her daughter back but it did bring out something beautiful in Daryl. It showed another part of him she could actually like, he liked history, he liked knowing exactly where he came from. She liked that he willingly shared that with her.

Sophia's death made their bond almost unbreakable. He got mad when she refused to go to Sophia's funeral but after they yelled at each other it cleared the air and he became her guardian angel, the same way she became his angel. Being the only two people without someone to look out for, the looked after each other. Daryl denied ever trying to take care of her but that was what he did in effect.

From Hershel's farm until that moment their bond hand grown and developed in to whatever they were doing now, Daryl was not the type of man to consider Carol his girlfriend and she wasn't sure if they'd even got that fair in their relationship yet. She shared a bed with him. They shared a few kisses now and then. He liked to hold her when they were alone, but that was it. They hadn't made a solid commitment.

Carol sighed as she held Daryl, silently running her fingers across the scar on his back that came from his arrow, it was the only scar he had that was not caused by violent abuse. "Maybe you should lie down and get some rest, we can take turns keeping our eye on the door." The had to watch the door in case any Walkers tried to get in.

Daryl looked the woman in the eye and considered her suggestion for a couple of seconds, he knew he should sleep off the rest of the whiskey but Daryl didn't like the idea of going to sleep in this place. He wished he was up on his perch. Carol took the man's wrist in her hand and pulled him down to the floor, he reached for his shirt and pulled it back on before leaning back against the wall, his knees bent and his arms crossed on his chest. The redneck fidgeted several times before closing his eyes, but that wasn't enough to calm his frazzled nerves enough to get him to sleep.

"You know what else I like about you?" Carol whispered, hoping her voice would be soothing and send him to sleep, just like it did when Sophia was scared. "I like your farmer's tan, I like that you actually have a red neck and I like your shoulders." She heard Daryl chuckle quietly to himself at those, he didn't know if she was being serious or not. "When we were on the farm I liked seeing your boots sat outside your tent, I like the way you mumble in your sleep and you drop your shoulder when you walk, I like when you storm off in a hissy fit you always head straight for your crossbow and the woods. I like watching you shave in the morning, I like seeing you hold Sophia as if she was your own daughter..." Carol trailed a little watching Daryl's head loll to one side before he came back around. "...I like the feeling of safety I get around you, I like that despite every thing you've been through you are still a good honest man. I like that your hair is so soft, I like that you could really do with cutting it, I like how your rough skin feels against mine. I like the fact you've never had a girlfriend and your still innocent, I like that Daryl Dixon has never had sex, I like how talking about sex makes you clammy and awkward."

Carol watched the man as his head fell forward a little and landed on one knee, in a faint whisper she said. "I like how you can fall asleep to the sound of my voice."


	10. Chapter 10

**Finally got to watch the last episode of Walking Dead, ooh emmm gee. As much as I love Daryl and his crossbow, there is something sexy about our Dixon carrying a machine gun.**

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Daryl hadn't suffered from a proper nightmare in quite sometime so when Carol woke up to the sound of whimpering, she was a little confused, she had to readjust to the darkness as she looked around for the only other person in the room. He was sat exactly where he'd fallen asleep but his fingers were tightly knotted in his hair and his feet were scraping against the floor like he was trying to scramble away, it was hard for Carol to watch but she wanted to see if Daryl could wake himself up this time, after all she wasn't always going to be around when this happened.

The man didn't look like he was crying, but in the darkness it was difficult to see properly. She could feel Daryl flinching and twitching violently, his body was shaking from his tense muscles making it look like he was about to explode. Carol wanted to wake him up, she wanted to caress his face until she could see his beautiful eyes but she couldn't bring herself to do it, his body and mind had to learn how to adjust.

Silently Carol watched as one of his hands came out of his hair and headed for his mouth, he chewed his thumb in fear making it even harder for her to just sit back and watch. Right when Carol was about to give in she saw Daryl's eyes flash open and in sheer panic he threw himself to the other side of the room, he pressed his back to the wall to get as far away from her as possible. But when Daryl's eyes finally got used to the dark he realised who she was and relaxed.

"Fuck." He whispered scrubbing his face to banish any remaining exhaustion. "Felt like he wer' in the room." Daryl mumbled keeping his eyes on Carol to stop his mind losing control, she didn't move an inch until Daryl shuffled his way back over, when he sat himself back down beside her Carol turned her body to the man to comfort him. She kept her hands to herself and let him decide what he wanted to do next.

Daryl's hand lifted to touch the woman's wrist, he was uncomfortable with the idea of taking her hand so he just circled her wrist with his fingers. The contact of their skin seemed to be a major help when he was struggling, he didn't always allow her to touch him especially not when he was angry, but other times it was the right way to subdue the flames. "You think they know were gone yet?" Carol asked brushing her thumb lightly over is knuckles, the skin had healed again showing patchy scars but his hands were still in repair so she didn't press too hard.

The redneck shrugged in response, his head snapped to the direction of the door when something banged against it, no doubt the Walkers trying to get in still. He ignored the noise and looked back at the only other person he had for company. "They know where we were, if Rick comes lookin', it won't be long. Jus' a while to go." She could see how optimistic he was trying to be, Daryl was trying to keep a level head and not work himself up again, it was a difficult task but he seemed to be managing. "That's if they want ma sorry ass back." He muttered under his breath hoping Carol wouldn't hear but she did, she frowned at the man making him squeeze her wrist very gently as he glared at the floor. "Can't do nothin' wit' these hands, wake 'em up most nights, ain't worth lookin' fer. Ain't worth shit."

"Oh, Daryl. Not this again please, you know that isn't true." Carol said feeling exhausted by his constant negativity, it was hard to think positively when you were crammed in a tiny room with no food, no water and no bathroom. There was no light, no breeze. They only had each other.

Daryl looked up at her and scowled, who was she to tell him what to think and what to say? "Jus' wanna get the fuck outta here." He grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest in frustration. Carol understood his frustrations and anxieties but he just had to hold out a little longer, Rick would find them, he would come looking and then they could both go back to the cell block. They'd get some food in them, take a shower and fall asleep beside each other on the perch, Carol felt like she could sleep for hours.

She had noticed how often Daryl was swearing again, he had stopped swearing as much as he used to when they moved in to the prison, it seemed as his anger simmered down so did his profanity but now it was back up to boiling point. The man was cursing again to vent, Carol knew Daryl needed that outlet but she much preferred it when he didn't swear. He seemed nicer and more approachable that way. "Sophia will be happy to see you again." Carol said absently trying to take his mind off being trapped, Daryl's shoulders slumped as he thought about the little girl, he adored that child. Almost as if she was his own.

"Think her Uncle Daryl's gonna abandon her?" He said smirking at the term he used to describe himself, Carol giggled and bumped him with her shoulder, he was a funny man when he didn't think about it. She liked listening to Daryl joke and make funny comments to make others laugh, that was part of his true personality, he could find humour in a dark situation. Daryl met the grey haired woman's eyes, almost completely forgetting about his previous anger caused by the nightmare about his father, if she asked he would tell her what happened, but until then he was going to keep that information to himself. Carol didn't need to know Daryl's father pinned him to a wall and used a knife to very faintly cut his skin, he'd done it so they wouldn't scar, they would be superficial but still cause him plenty of pain and draw plenty of blood. He could remember the feeling of the knife piercing his skin, the feeling of his legs giving out because of blood loss, the look on Merle's face when he found his baby brother lying in a pool of his own blood.

Carol saw the memory flash in eyes but didn't ask him what it was about, the heavy topic would make it harder for him to relax. "I know you would never abandon that little girl." She replied in a matter-of-fact voice, Daryl loved the little girl even if he couldn't admit it, if he was to leave the prison with the intent to never return then he would be leaving with a broken and heavy heart. Carol found herself admiring the way the man named himself 'Uncle Daryl', he would never say it in front of the others but it was wonderful to see him including himself in their group, including himself in their dysfunctional family. "Can't wait to get back and get a shower." Carol whispered as an almost backhanded comment, Daryl just groaned at the thought of a somewhat warm shower, he may have always been dirty and sweaty but he did enjoy a decent shower when he could.

Just like that Carol was imagining Daryl in the shower, she had never thought of him in that way before but she could not completely shake the image. The water cascading down his shoulders. The shape of his body. His hands running across his skin. Fingers running through his hair. Groaning as his muscles relaxed.

Carol took a sharp breath and shook her head to vanquish the image of Daryl naked, the breath startled Daryl making him flinch, he glanced at her in concern. "You okay?" He asked totally unaware that rough, undefined voice did not help her situation. When Carol didn't reply he leaned towards her, looking in her eyes for a sign or a clue as to what her problem was.

"I-I'm fine, just thinking." Carol replied trying her best to hide the stutter but it was unsuccessful Daryl noticed straight away, he got the wrong idea. He thought she was panicking, he thought she was thinking they'd never get out.

Daryl squeezed her wrist gently with his fingers, he was trying to reassure her, trying to make Carol feel better. "Want'a talk 'bout it?" Daryl asked, it was like he was taking a leaf from her book. He was not the kind of man who liked talking of emotions and feelings but he cared about Carol so much, he had to respond in the way she would. When Carol shook her head he felt a little offended, if the roles were reversed she would bother him in to telling her the problem, so that was what he did. He kept bothering her and prodding her until she gave up.

"You ain't gonna like this..." She said meeting his eyes, he shuffled uncomfortably but nodded curtly to make her continue. "I was thinking about you... in the... shower." She mumbled staring at the floor in embarrassment, there was an awkward moment of silence making her cringe but just a few seconds later, she heard him chuckling. Carol looked back up at the man and saw the genuine twinkle in his eyes.

He was smiling as he scratched the back of his head in nervousness. "You think that's bad..." He started biting his lip as he considered admitting to his own truth. "Saw ya in the shower once, you wer' stood right in the door, closed the door so no one else could see. Didn' want that convict lookin' in." Daryl said as he avoided looking at Carol, he didn't want to tell her that despite his best intentions, he couldn't help but take a peek. He felt awful for a little while, but eventually he got over it. Carol for a moment seemed stunned making Daryl hop to his feet and walk in circles, he thought she was mad at him, he thought she was going to be furious at him because Daryl had seen her naked in the shower. "Didn't mean t' look, had'ta close the door. Had no choice!" The last few words were snappy.

Carol just shook her head and stood up, she swayed a little from the lack of food and water but she didn't let it affect her. She wanted to focus on Daryl, Carol wanted to focus on calming Daryl down, he had frightened himself again. She wasn't mad at the man for doing what he did, part of her completely understood if he took a sneaky peek, he was a man who never had seen a woman naked in the flesh before. Carol had not realised when she was in the shower she stood in full view of the door, Daryl had started off with the best intentions and just wanted to close the door but his hormones and curiousity obviously got the better of him. If Daryl had been anybody else Carol would have felt embarrassed and horrified, but because it had been him who had looked in, she was barely concerned. What Daryl did with the image of her in the shower was his business.

"Daryl, it's alright." Carol whispered watching him thread his fingers through his hair and tug until his knuckles were white, Daryl kept shifting from foot to foot, spurting out apologies and telling her spying on her in the shower was never his intention. Even as she tried to calm his frazzled nerves the words would just pour out of his mouth. "Daryl, just stop!"

Instantly the man froze and shrunk back as he stared at her, he threw his head back and stared at the ceiling, embarrassed that he overreacted again. Daryl was not used to his emotions taking over, he usually had such solid control over those feeling, but since the night of his first nightmare, that barrier he built had crumbled down. Daryl was unsure if he'd ever be able to rebuild that barrier, he just wanted to go back to the way he was before, whether that meant the constant anger came back too or not. The redneck man was fed up of being so unstable. He was done being 'emotionally diverse', the man wanted to forget the constant ache in his chest when he thought of his childhood, he wanted to forget feeling lost and childlike so he could become a real man.

Daryl wanted to give Carol the happiness she was looking for, to give her the stability she needed, but that was never going to happen if he didn't gain some kind control.

"You ain't mad?" Daryl whispered clenching his fingers in his hair. "You should be pissed... why ain't you pissed?" He asked watching Carol take a few steps in his direction, she gently peeled his fingers from his hair and dropped his arms to his sides. Carol shifted her hands to his chest to feel his heart beat erratically, Daryl's body tensed at the contact but relaxed again within seconds.

The woman smiled making him frown in confusion, he could not understand why she was grinning at his question. "Because it was you Daryl, nobody else, it was you and you're special."

"I don't get it, 'm allowed to watch you shower cause I'm special?"

Carol giggled and fisted his shirt in her fingers, she caught sight of his shirt lifting slightly to expose the skin of his stomach, she wanted to reach down and brush her fingers against him but she knew he'd freak. That kind of touch was just too much for him at the moment, it seemed too sexual and he could not handle that, sex was a none approachable subject. "I'm okay with it, look at the world we live in, your male hormones were bound to get the better of you at some point." She said gently pulling him by his shirt so their noses brushed and their breath mingled, his breath hitched but he forced himself to regulate again. She was trying to distract him and doing it this way was more than welcomed.

Carol smiled as he tipped his mouth towards hers and grazed her lips, his kisses always made her heart race, the way his hands grasped at the side of her face possessively made her stomach flip in excitement. A slight taste of whiskey still hung around in his mouth making her press firmly against him, she had to taste more. Daryl's cheeks coloured slightly and radiated heat at her persistence, he could feel a strange fluttering in his chest, he wasn't sure if that was even supposed to happen or if his heart was giving out on him.

If he was about to have a heart attack and die then he was going to get his fair share out of this woman, with out a second thought he pulled away to take a deep breath and crushed his mouth against hers, wanting nothing more than to just convey his feelings without having to say them out-loud. To kiss her the way he wanted to the night before. This was about pure need and desire, not testing the boundaries. It wasn't about being gentle and careful with each other, it was about having time alone so he could express himself, even if he didn't entirely understand what he was feeling.

His lips changed from grazing to grasping at hers, his breath staggered as the atmosphere changed, there was a fire inside them both growing with each moment. Carol shifted one hand from his shirt to the back of head, pulling him closer if it was even possible. She could have gasped at the feeling of his new stubble scratching her face, the feeling of rough skin clutching her face as his dry, slightly chapped lips collided with hers.

Daryl held the woman tightly, cradling her face as she groaned in his mouth. He smirked, a little proud he was able to make her do that, he felt a little courageous and as he moved his hands to her waist he gently pried her mouth open with his tongue. Carol felt her heart squeeze in excitement as his tongue adventured in to his mouth, she could have melted as she met him, allowing them to hastily caress each other. Nobody had ever made her feel that way before, not even at the beginning of her relationship with Ed. Despite his lack of experience, Daryl knew exactly what to do, as if a switch had been flicked he had become exactly what she wanted.

His aching fingers clutched at the material of her shirt as he reluctantly pulled away from their kiss, he could have carried on kissing her for hours but his need for air was resounding, he didn't expect to stumble backwards and fall against the wall. Daryl was not used to this. Being overcome by his negative emotions felt awful, but these emotions, he wanted them to take over. Like a primal instinct. He leaned forward again, his hands pushing him off the wall slightly to place a few more gentle kisses on her lips, his eyes sliding shut as he let one hand cup the back of her head. There was nothing needy about this kiss, it was more innocent and chaste than the other almost like he was thanking her for letting him have complete control. Daryl needed to be in control and decide how fast they moved to keep her safe, to protect her from himself, there was no other way to take care of her.

Neither of the pair heard the door creak open, if Daryl hadn't been so wrapped up in the taste and feel of Carol he probably would have saw the light pour in the room, but he was too distracted. For a hunter and a survivor, distractions were dangerous. The door lingered slightly ajar for a moment before sliding open a little further, in shambled a dark figure who just stared at them.

Daryl and Carol both yanked away from each other when they heard a familiar voice from behind them, it was the sheriff. Carol whirled around spotting the smug grin on the man's face, he had caught them. It seemed being locked away in a cupboard had is perks and advantages. She ran at Rick and threw her arms around his shoulders as she hugged him tightly, that didn't quite sit right with Daryl, seeing her practically dive on the other man made his stomach churn and his chest ache. She had never ran at him like that, Carol had never greeted Daryl by throwing her arms around his neck and squeezing him tight, was this... jealousy? He wanted to shove Rick away from his woman, she was his woman, she belonged to him and not the leader of their group. Daryl wanted to throw Rick against a wall and take Carol away, he met Rick's eyes with a cold hard stare but he didn't seem to recognise the look.

"Here's me thinkin' you two were gonna kill each other in here." Rick said as he held Carol in his arms, he was so glad they were alive. Both of them. He would not of coped losing two more members of their group. Especially not someone as compassionate as Carol and someone as talented as Daryl, the group would never have survived if the pair had turned or been devoured.

The woman would always take care of others, most of the time putting them before herself with little to no complaints, she had given up complaining about the squalor they had to live in. She had now adjusted and realised this was close to modern day luxury.

Daryl on the other hand was their source of food and sustenance, the group needed Daryl to keep them alive when food was short, he was a prolific hunter and protector. He had rescued many members of the group countless times, Daryl's crossbow provided the perfect form of silent support, he could wipe Walkers out with little effort and next to no noise. But it wasn't just that they needed Daryl but the group wanted him around, despite his sometimes frosty attitude he was a caring and loving man, it may of been well hidden but it was there. It was evident in the way he whisked Carl away and treated Sophia like a princess.

"Can we get the fuck outta here now?" Daryl said feeling a little snappy and unhappy, Rick still hadn't let go of Carol. Rick nodded with a grin and moved aside allowing them both to pass in to the corridor, the sheriff placed his hand on Daryl's shoulder as he passed. It was like he'd forgotten making the redneck freeze and force himself not to turn around and punch the man, Rick backed up a little realising what he'd done and giving him the space he needed.

Carol turned around and met Daryl's icy eyes as he stood in the doorway, his jaw clenched solid as he connected with her gaze. Her greyish-blue eyes showed him he was safe and there was nobody around to hurt him. Carol let her hand reach for the man's fingers and weave together. "Come on, you look shattered." She whispered using her other hand to brush her fingers across his jaw and cool him off.

"Got more sleep than you." He whispered in reply as Carol gently pulled him down the corridor with Rick behind them, he wasn't going to make the mistake of touching the other man again, no matter how innocent the touch was supposed to be. Carol grinned and rolled her eyes at the man as she lightly squeezed his fingers.

"I was thinkin' dinner, shower then bed?" Carol said trying to keep his head level, he was tired and uncomfortable, so by keeping him talking or just thinking she could stop him freaking and lashing out at Rick for getting too close. It was not Rick's intention to send Daryl back in to defensive mode, he had no idea Daryl was claustrophobic and even though he knew Daryl had issues he didn't know exactly what kind. But his reaction to a male touch gave him a pretty good idea. The man had Daddy issues. And probably brother issues too.

Daryl chuckled weakly feeling deflated and ready to just curl up in bed and sleep for a month. "Tryin' get me inta bed again?" He said stumbling in the cell block with heavy eyes, the smell of food didn't do much to perk him up it just made his stomach growl. He was starving but also exhausted, his need for sleep was more pressing.

He come back to life a few minutes later when the group ran at them excited to see them alive, the attention was almost too much for him and made him shrink back in the nearest corner and let everybody fuss over Carol, everybody but Carl who smiled in understanding at him. Knowing Daryl was unhappy with all that attention. After a little while slumped against the wall Carol took his wrist again and sat him down on the stairs, she thrust food in his hands that had been initially prepared for the others and sat beside him with her own, the group was still fussing over their arrival but he was more interested in getting the food in his system.

Daryl managed half a bowl before the fork and food fell out of his hands, he was so wiped he could not hold on to his food. Carol giggled beside him and wrapped her closest arm around his waist to keep him upright, his head lolled to one-side making him start awake.

"Go to bed Daryl, I'll be up in a minute." Carol whispered squeezing his waist as he scrubbed his eyes, he glanced at her as he forced himself to stay awake. He was reluctant to leave her, Daryl absolutely did not want to leave her and then wake up again finding her missing. Daryl was scared of leaving Carol and not finding her again. "Promise."

He let out a deep breath and smiled weakly, he reached one hand over to grab her face, his rough fingers stroking her jaw to grab her attention. Daryl pushed himself forward to capture her mouth in a kiss, he did not care the rest of the group were watching he just wanted her to know how much Daryl appreciated her. The man was thankful for her constant care and adoration.

Daryl pulled back to the sound of whistled but ignored them and headed upstairs to his perch. He barely felt Carol crawl in to his bed and wrap her arms around him, Daryl grunted and lazily shuffled closer to her, holding the warm body to his own. He could feel her head as it rest on his chest, within seconds the pair were asleep completely oblivious of the missing members of their group.


	11. Chapter 11

When Carol woke she was surprised to see Daryl's side of the bed empty, when she lay her hand down his mattress was cold. Like he'd been gone for a few hours, she had not expected him to even be awake yet, he was so exhausted yesterday she thought he would sleep for most of the day. His emotional mood swings were stressful and tiring, the constant strain of trying to keep himself together was making it worse, he was too stubborn to just let himself go. The man's emotional breakdown was long overdue but he still kept putting it off, sure Daryl had cried and got pretty messed up over Merle but that wasn't nearly enough to help him accept his past, if he wanted things to get better he had to let go off his control and just find that release button. Sometimes Daryl reminded Carol of a child, which in essence was where his emotional state still was. He would always bottle up anything he felt and express it by acting out, he'd have temper tantrums and fits of rage, Daryl's frustrations were always taken out on the people he cared about and the people who cared about him.

Carol sighed and ran her fingers through her hair as she stretched in the bed wondering what Daryl was up to. She felt bad for constantly molly coddling him and checking up on his whereabouts but with him being so unbalanced at the moment Carol felt like she had to, she had to keep tabs on Daryl to stop him losing his mind, it wouldn't be fair on anybody if he lost control of his aggression. Unfair and dangerous, she could only imagine the horror if he finally cracked and in his childish-mentally confused manner, hurt Carl or even Sophia. As Carol sat up she spotted Rick coming out of his cell with Sophia, making Carol's heart squeeze painfully and her eyes fill up with tears. After everything they'd been through. Why Lori? Why did the Walkers have to get to Lori just when her relationship with her family was picking up again, just after her new baby was born.

And T-Dog. How she was going to miss hearing him laugh every morning. While Daryl and Carol had been stuck in the closet because of the Walker herd, the group had searched for them constantly. Lori had offered to take Rick's place so he could rest for a little while, she paired up with T-Dog and they set off down one of the corridors together, just as the herd looped back around. Nobody knew exactly what had happened but they'd found the bodies two or three hours later, as a result the corridor was completely cleared by Rick himself, it wasn't enough to bring Lori or T-Dog back though.

Rick's eyes met Carol's as he came closer with his little girl in his arms and smiled sadly like he knew what she was thinking about. "You might want to head to the canteen, got a feeling Daryl might need you soon."

Carol sighed and nodded. "Did you tell him?" Rick nodded back and bit his lip to quell his tears, he didn't want to cry in front of Carol. He didn't even want to think about his long gone wife. How was Daryl going to react to the news of Carol and T-Dog's deaths? Part of her wished Rick had woke her up so she could have been there with him, she could not imagine what was going on in the man's head at that moment, he might have seemed fine but inside there would be a storm brewing.

The woman slowly got to her feet and rubbed his forehead, she could feel a headache coming on. Carol considered heading for a shower before heading to the canteen but she couldn't handle the thought of leaving Daryl on his own, she rubbed her fingers feeling a dull ache right in her bones, that must have been what it was like for Daryl. His painful fingers would have a familiar feeling.

Carol watched Rick descend the stairs with his daughter and carefully followed him constantly watching the way he walked. He had the gait of a defeated man. Slowly the trio headed out of the cell block toward the canteen, they had not even got halfway down the corridor when she heard Daryl shouting, but there was a man shouting back at him too. A voice she recognized but hadn't heard in a long time.

Rick and Carol reached the doorway, her jaw nearly dropped. Daryl was stood in the middle of the floor surrounded by the rest of the group, opposite him was a man who sent chills down Carol's spine. Merle. She groaned again and shook her head, what on earth was he doing here? Why was Merle in the prison at all? Just the sight of Merle made Carol want to throw up, he was a dangerous and slightly psychotic, she wanted to close her eyes and make him disappear.

Daryl looked furious. Merle's presence had sent his hackles up and he was poised ready for a fight, Merle on the other hand was stood with his arm and his modified other arm at his sides, he was entirely calm and did not look like he wanted to fight with Daryl. He didn't look high or drunk or dangerous. The man looked like he just wanted to talk to his baby brother without a fight, it was strange to see the roles reversed, Daryl was usually the calmer one of the brothers. Merle probably thought Daryl looked crazy and didn't know what to do with his brother in such a frenzied state, Daryl looked like he was going to tear his older brother apart in front of everyone.

"Chill the fuck out Daryl." Merle said snapping the blade off his modified arm and throwing it on the ground in front of Glenn, that way if Daryl lunged at him, he would not end up stabbing his brother to death. The clatter of the metal on the cold stone floor would stay with her forever, that sound was the beginning of an awful encounter between two blood related men.

Daryl grit his teeth angrily and clenched his hands, Carol internally smiled seeing a handful of new gauze strips wrapped around Daryl's hands tightly, they looked like Hershel had tied them. Daryl had let Hershel near him, he had let their doctor take care of him. She was proud of him for allowing that, but she could not express that pride just yet, that was something she would remember for the next time he needed reassurance. "Don't tell me t' chill out, why don't you fuck back off t' Woodbury or whatever the hell that shitty place is called." He spat shifting from foot-to-foot in an attempt to reign in his anger and stop him from throwing punches.

"Come all this way jus' ta talk t' you, why you flippin' out?" Merle said walking towards one of the benches in the room, with each step he kept his eyes on Daryl as he sat down. The elder man didn't look nervous despite the younger Dixon's unusual behaviour, there were barely any emotions on his face in contrast to Daryl's.

Carol slowly stepped around Rick, who tried to stop her and headed towards the frustrated man. She wasn't afraid of him this time even though he was unbelievably angry and that had previously been dangerous, now she was okay with it, Carol had learned what not to do when trying to bring him down. She stopped a few steps away from the man as he yelled a reply at his brother, something about Daryl's brother was bringing back bad memories. "Daryl?" Carol said gently reaching out to brush his wrist with her fingertips, he glanced at her but said nothing as he glared back at his brother. "You gotta relax a little." She whispered holding his wrist gently in her hand, that caught Merle's attention.

"I see why you don't wanna leave now, got yourself a bit of ass runnin' around." Merle said pushing at Daryl's buttons on purpose, he wanted to wind Daryl up for telling him he would not leave with Merle. "Didn't know you liked 'em old brother, at least your screwing an older chick 'n' not a goddamn shirt-lifter."

Daryl's hands clenched tightly before pulling away from Carol and threading through his hair, he swiveled on his heel before turning back, looking from Carol to Merle. There was a fire in his eyes she understood, he wanted to put his fist through a wall again, he wanted to destroy anything he could. "Fuck you Merle, don't you call her a fuckin' piece of ass. Jus' get outta here, I don't need you or want you 'ere. Gotta a real family now!"

Merle scoffed and shook his head, Carol could tell exactly what he was thinking and it made her mad. How could he even think what he was about to say. "Don't tell me these people made ya inta pussy. Fuck Darylina, if Daddy was here he'd-"

"-Well he ain't here!" Daryl yelled before Merle could finish. "And I'm fuckin' glad. He beat t' crap outta me for fun, that ain't what a father's 'posed t' do, that ain't what a brother's 'posed t' do either. I ain't gone fuckin' soft!" Daryl spat furiously at his brother stalking towards him so he could stare him in the eye. "Jus' let people give a shit about me. Jus' fuckin' get out!" He yelled shoving at his brother's chest to push him away. "Don't ever want'a see you again!" Daryl had wanted a reunion with his brother at some point, he had wanted Merle to walk back in to his life somehow miraculously different but instead he was the same horrific person just without the drugs, he still believed insulting his brother was the way forward. Insulting every one around him made him the big man, whatever he got up to in Woodbury had just fueled his ego and his insane behaviour. That forced Daryl to make his decision, his brother was no good for him or his family so he had to go. But Merle wasn't just going to leave without stabbing his knife in Daryl's heart first.

Merle clicked his tongue at his brother and grinned, he lifted his hand and ran his fingers across Daryl's face making Daryl tense up in fear and anger, he forced himself not to flinch when Merle's hand slapped against his cheek sharply. Daryl heard several people move towards them as if they were going to pull Merle away but Daryl just held out a hand stopping them, he didn't want anyone to get hurt the way he knew he was going to, he couldn't bare the thought of Merle striking Carol or anyone else. "You know what..." Merle growled in a low voice gripping his baby brothers face tightly, Carol could see Daryl's fists clenching as Merle's fingers dug in to his face, he knew about the socket and the pain he could cause. "...I never should'a saved such an ungrateful shit like you, should'a let you die that day, should'a let you bleed out and die jus' like you wanted."

Merle removed his fingers from Daryl's skin and grabbed his wrist, making the man stare at the thin scar that tainted his skin, a scar that he'd given himself. Carol gasped and felt her eyes fill up with tears at the thought, Daryl had tried to kill himself. He tried to commit suicide. At some point, a younger more vulnerable Daryl wanted... to die.

Just like that Daryl was back in his room with his father's influence weighing him down.

_ His drinking was getting worse, heavier. Merle was gone again, god only knows where and that left Daryl home alone. Even at twenty-four he was afraid of his father so he hid away in his bedroom, listening to him bang against the door and spit out a stream of profanity as he sat on his bed watching the door, Daryl had locked it the moment he got in and just waited for his father to either ram it down and beat the shit out of him or to just leave._

_The screaming and shouting went on for a full twenty minutes. His father kept yelling how nobody cared about Daryl, how nobody loved him or wanted him around, how he was stupid and how his own father wished he was dead. Daryl's father didn't love him and just wanted him to die, nothing more, nothing less. Daryl didn't know how long he'd been crying but he could hear his father laughing outside because of his weakness, then there was silence from both father and Daryl who had choked back his tears. Without removing his eyes from the door he slid a hand under his pillow and felt something sharp prick the end of his finger. He grasped it in his palm, not caring about the blade cutting in to his hand._

_Nobody was going to miss him. His life wasn't going to amount to much, if anything he'd end up an alcoholic or in prison just like his daddy and Merle. So without a second thought he readjusted his hand on the knife he hid under his pillow for protection, took a deep breath and slid it across his wrist. He was surprised by how easily the skin cut even with the knife being reasonably blunt, he had expected it to hurt more, or maybe it was just because he'd been hurt so many times before the pain that came with the release of his death was nothing. Daryl stared down at his wrist and watched the blood trickle down on to his mattress and soak in to the dirty grey sheet, soon enough he'd be gone and his father would never hurt him again._

_That was until Merle got home a little while later. As Merle stormed up the stairs fully prepared to scream at Daryl for not filling the truck up after using it, he found his father slumped against the wall beside Daryl's door, pissed out of his mind and unconscious. Merle purposely kicked the man over not being at all careful with the amount of force he used and banged on Daryl's door. "Pussy, you better get yer ass out here now or I'm gonna come in!" Merle yelled as he repeatedly pounded his fist against Daryl's door in anger. That was when the iron smell hit him, he glanced down at the pathetic excuse for a father and wondered if he had kicked him so hard he had started to bleed, but there was no sign of his blood anywhere. That left one possible explanation. "Daryl!"_

_Merle had never been so scared, he threw himself against the door repeatedly until the lock gave out and he finally fell in to his little brother's room. The stench of blood was strong. His bed was covered in the red substance and laying in the middle of it staring at the ceiling lay a rapidly paling man. Daryl's eyes looked heavy, his skin was grey and his body was twitching. "Fuck Daryl. Fuck, don't die on me."_

Daryl said nothing when his older brother slapped his face again a little harder and stormed out, shoving his way through the group. He just stood staring at the spot his brother had just been stood in, he could feel his eyes stinging and burning with un-shed tears, that was his brother and his brother wanted him to die. Carol stood just a few feet from the man and watched his shoulders begin to shake as he tried desperately to control his emotions, but there was little success. For a while everybody just stood around and listened to Daryl choke on tears of sheer agony, they could only stand behind him as his body shook with nearly three decades of pain, nobody knew how to make any thing better. Nobody could erase what had just been said from Daryl's mind, nobody could undo Daryl's past to make it better, they could only stand by helplessly and listen to him gasping for breath as he stood in the middle of the canteen.

Carol was shocked when she saw Maggie gently un-peel herself from Glenn's arms and carefully, cautiously, step towards the utterly broken man. She circled around him before stopping in front of him, gently using two fingers to lift the redneck's chin and get a good view of his face. "I can't make this better for you Daryl, but you should know, I'm glad he found you." She whispered forcing him to meet her eyes, Carol could see the fiery passion in Maggie's eyes. "We might not be here if it wasn't for you, you've saved us more times than I can remember, you kept us fed." Maggie slowly shifted her hand to brush it over his now red cheek, either she didn't feel his metal face or just chose to ignore it as she ran her thumb over the finger marks in his skin. "I'm thankful you're alive, I wouldn't have gained a good honest friend if you weren't." She whispered gently rising on to her toes to kiss his cheek, he flinched back a little but nodded minutely at her attempt to make him better. It didn't do much to fix the hole that had been blasted through his heart but it was the starting point.

Carol's heart practically broke when Daryl cringed and tried to escape Maggie's hands, it was like his skin was on fire as she touched him, like her fingers were made of acid. Maggie seemed to notice the redneck's discomfort and it hurt to watch him squirm. Carol knew the rest of the group were imagining some of the things Daryl had been through, but they would never know really understand how bad things got when he was a child. They would never know Daryl's father stabbed him in the back with a shattered bottle because of an inherited birthmark, they would never understand why Daryl refused to sleep in a cell, and they certainly were not going to see the way his back was torn to pieces.

Maggie smiled sadly at him as he retracted from Daryl and headed towards Glenn again, leaving Daryl stood in the middle of the canteen. After a few more minutes of hesitation the rest of the group piled out, leaving just Carol and Daryl alone. "You didn't tell me you tried to..." She trailed off unable to say that last few words without filling up. Carol did not even want to imagine what life would be like now without Daryl. It was heart wrenching to think Daryl had done something so drastic because he felt so alone and afraid all because of his father.

Daryl shrugged with his back still facing her. "Didn't see the point." He muttered with a hint of anger in his voice but it was mostly over-ridden by the numbness pouring off him. "Didn't finish the job. Too stupid t' even kill myself properly."

Carol gasped and found herself both upset and furious with that statement, he couldn't possibly believe that. That was the worst thing she'd ever heard him say, that he was too stupid to kill himself. He hated himself so much and thought so little of himself, Daryl believed he could not even take his own life successfully. She marched forward and planted herself directly in front of him, Daryl's eyes remained on the floor and refused to budge as she stood there. "Of all the things you could think, there's no way you could actually believe that. For goodness sake Daryl, you are not stupid!" Carol said hotly watching him flinch away from her harsh voice, within seconds Carol felt bad for practically yelling at him after that but he needed to hear the truth. "So you can't read too good, maybe you get a little mixed up when counting but it doesn't make you stupid, you taught yourself to do those things. Teaching yourself to read and count while having your head bounced off a wall is incredibly brave and smart, you can track and hunt like nobody's business, whatever Merle and your father filled your head with was wrong. They were always drunk and high, you can't believe anything people like that say." She said reaching forward to take his hand, Carol didn't expect Daryl to jump away from her.

He rubbed at his eyes to get rid of the angry tears that were building up. "Ya don't know what'cha talkin' 'bout." He whispered looking to the doorway of the canteen, he wanted to leave. Daryl wanted to run out of the prison and disappear in to the woods for a little while, he could finally hold his knife so that meant he was able to wipe out a few Walkers to let off some steam.

Carol groaned in frustration. "Daryl, if you were stupid or disgusting or... anything like your family, do you think I would give a damn about you?" She said stepping closer to his body so she could fist his shirt in her hands, but he swiftly moved away from her hand trying to avoid any contact with the woman. Carol seemed hurt by his avoidance technique but he couldn't help himself, his body was filled with adrenaline and fear, he just wanted to get away from the prison and everyone else.

"Maybe you're wrong!" Daryl spat his aggression and fury taking control of him again, he hadn't meant to become so upset but with Carol on his case it was bound to happen. She should have been trying to comfort him, Carol knew trying to make him believe in himself was not going to work but she insisted on pushing him, why wouldn't she just leave him alone and let him feel whatever he wanted. When he was ready to get over it, he would. "Keep tellin' me I'm good and wonderful 'n' all this shit but I don't feel it, I can't feel good 'bout myself. Nobody gives a damn 'bout me, nobody ever loved me, why would they?"

Carol watched tears over spill on to Daryl's face and streak down his cheeks, he had a deep-set angry frown and his hands were clenched tightly as he turned on his heel to stalk off elsewhere. "That's where you're wrong Daryl." She said quietly, just loud enough for him to hear as he reached the exit. "I love you." Carol could see the man freeze and grip the walls at those words, she didn't know what else to say or do as he just stood there doing nothing. Carol's heart was in her mouth and her hands were unbelievably clammy as he glanced over his shoulder, but her heart dropped at as he walked away, leaving her stood by herself in the prison's canteen.

She had not seen Daryl this way in such a long time, Carol thought Daryl had made progress and had got over a massive emotional hurdle, but it appeared that hurdle had tripped him up. Daryl had taken one step forward and two steps back. Carol didn't know what else she was supposed to do to make him see what she could see, there was no way the man would ever accept her opinion, the only way that seemed viable was to beat it in to him. But there was no way she was going to do that, Carol would never let anyone lay their hands on Daryl again. If one visit from Merle could undo all her work, she could only imagine what a full-scale beating could do to him. The disturbed and erratic Daryl she knew now would never be a fraction of what it would be like if someone actually beat him black and blue, that was if they'd even be able to get close enough to hurt lay a finger on him, much less actually abuse him.

Carol felt like crying, she had never felt so helpless. The woman wanted to make the man she shared a bed with happy, she wanted him to see not everyone hated him, that was exactly why she had told him how he felt. That she loved him. She loved every part of the damaged, raging, hot-headed but beautiful man. Daryl's broken heart and complex self-esteem issues were not enough to repulse her.

Something in Carol's mind seemed to click in to place at that moment, she had spent the past few weeks trying to heal his aching heart, trying to make him forget everything he had been through but that was not what he wanted. Not what he needed. Daryl needed her to point out as many of his flaws she could find and tell him she just did not care, she was not disgusted or irritated by them, she loved his flaws as much as she loved everything good about him.

Carol started from the canteen down the corridor to look for Daryl, she figured he would head outside and probably go hunting, probably closer to murdering a load of Walkers to let his anger out. She ran as fast as she could to find him, when she reached the door leading outside it sat slightly ajar showing he had been through, Carol shoved the door open and sprinted down the stairs to see the man walking towards the first set of gates.

"Daryl!" Carol yelled running down to him as close as she dared to get. Daryl didn't stop moving but he certainly slowed down to show he was listening. "You've got a really bad temper, awful, but I really don't mind. You've got this horrid habit where you gut the animals you've caught, then you leave the bloody knife next to the clean food, as disgusting as it is... I'm not bothered. Daryl you are broken and damaged but it does not matter to me, you only want to hear negative points and things that make you look bad, you know what... fine. I'll tell you everything about you that is even a little bit annoying, but you have to put up with everything good too, you have to let me tell you everything I love about you too." It was a compromise she was willing to take part in, there was no way Carol was going to point out the bad without showing him the good, to reinforce the negative and then reinforce the positive.

Daryl slowly turned around and glanced at her from the corner of his eye, he couldn't bring himself to look entirely at her. "I'm gonna head out fer a while, clear my head, need ta take some time." He whispered quietly. She could see how heavy his heart was.

"I know Daryl, I understand." Carol replied gently, she was not going to stop him. She would worry about him every moment he was gone, she would carefully plan out their next conversation so not to hurt him or scare him anymore, Carol knew as he walked away Daryl was going to find somewhere to hide and breakdown. He'd find himself a safe spot, probably stay there for a day or two and let everything go, he would finally let between twenty and thirty years of agony out until he was ready to come back. "I'll tell Rick not to look for you." Carol said as she watched the man walk away, she could see the tension he was carrying and the heartbreak followed him out of the gate like a moth to a flame.

* * *

**AN:/ For those of you who are enjoying this fic so far, I have another called Hick's Healer. It's a two shot so far where basically; Daryl contracted an infection after impaling himself with his arrow, after a month battling with this infection he wakes up to find the group much larger. What he does not expect to find is his girlfriend Aly and her daughter Cora. Obviously there's a bit of fluffy cute Daryl and of course the cute little girl is going to make him get all mushy. But please don't get me wrong I am all for Carol and Daryl getting it on, it was just that this idea crept up on me one day so I wrote it down. At the minute Hick's Healer only has 7 reviews, I'd like to get some more feedback where I can on anything I can add/improve. In the future it may develop in to a multi-chapter, but that would probably be nearer the end of Dreamer's Mist. Save any confusion.**

**Another point I'd like to mention, if at any point you notice some words spelled the English way and then later on the same word is spelled the American way, I apologise. I don't know why I keep randomly switching, it is not intentional. I think it's because my computer uses U.S. standard English but the iPad I often use to write uses U.K. standard English.**


	12. Chapter 12

Carol walked around only a shadow of the person she used to be, without Daryl around to take care of, she was just wandering around. All morning she had tried to occupy herself with menial tasks that meant she didn't have to think about the missing redneck.

She worked on preparing the group's breakfast with Beth, usually Lori would sit beside them and they'd chat about irrelevant rubbish. They'd share stories from the past and talk about strange things they'd seen since the world went to hell, but without Lori, the two women working on breakfast sat in silence just slicing and dicing. There was no meat today, hadn't been for a while since his first outburst.

With the lack of conversation between Beth and Carol it was hard for her not to wonder where Daryl was or what he was doing, but she somehow managed it. Throughout breakfast Carol found herself sitting on the stairs where he'd usually sit, just eating alone, trying to pretend he was right next to her. Trying to feel his presence without him actually being around, when she finished her breakfast, Carol cleaned everything that had been used. She even cleaned the empty bowls that should have contained everyone else's breakfast.

When Carol was done cleaning up she headed to the shower block, hoping the shower would wash her pain away was too much to ask. Arriving in the block the first thing she spotted was the mucky white bottle with the green lid, that was his gel. Carol picked up the bottle and flipped the lid, instantly the mint and cucumber smell filled the air, it felt like he was right there with her. Carol could smell him and it made her heartache. The redneck would be pretty pissed if he found out she'd used just a tiny bit of his gel but she had to do it, his scent was comforting to her.

Once again Carol found herself alone with her thoughts and she could hardly stand it, without her furious redneck it felt like she had a massive hole in her heart. Carol couldn't cope with not knowing how he was, where he was or what he was doing. Showering did very little to get rid of the thought of Daryl so she moved on to the next task that needed doing, washing.

The group's clothes needed washing, so she slowly wandered around the cell block with a laundry cart filling it up with clothes, she purposely left the perch she shared with Daryl until last. Collecting everyone else's clothes before theirs.

Carol had no idea why but she picked up all Lori's clothes and then all of T-Dog's before dumping them in the laundry cart to wash them, when she reached the perch for the second time she sighed sadly and reached for Daryl's dirty poncho and his sweaty, filthy shirts. The majority of his worn out old shirts were a mess, the threads were frayed and the material was holey.

She held the poncho to her chest and inhaled a deep waft of Daryl mixed with cucumber, mint, sweat and earth. Being without him hurt worse than she ever imagined it would, Carol had told him to leave and clear his head, she knew that meant being alone for a few days yet she could barely survive a few hours without him.

Every moment she spent away from the man she felt herself becoming more and more sick, the woman's head was beginning to throb with an intensity she didn't recognise and she felt sick to her stomach, the dull ache in her bones increased every time she moved. Just picking up Daryl's colourless, dull shirt was a challenge. Carol felt awful when she grabbed a pair of Daryl's socks that were barely holding themselves together, besides that pair and the pair he was wearing he had nothing else. Carol decided at that moment when she had successfully washed everybody's clothes she would darn and sew his back together, as best she could with what little they had.

She had managed to grab the sewing kit from the RV before they abandoned it back on the highway, but the stock of thread and material was getting low, she had yet to find anything to replenish the items. As Carol trundled down the prison with the laundry cart something else occurred to her, she could do plenty of other things to make his life a little easier. He couldn't read so she could teach him, he could count but not brilliantly so she could teach him that too. Carol could teach Daryl to do these things and make him believe in himself, it would help him become the strong, brave man he used to be. Daryl might kick up a storm at first saying she was fussing and making him feel ridiculous, but eventually she would get through to him.

So just like that, she knew what she wanted and how she was going to do it. Carol took the cart in to the laundry room and set everything up for a wash, she then used the now empty cart as a transport vehicle of another kind, she headed to the prison library with it. Where she would throw in plenty of book she thought may interest Daryl slightly, Carol then grabbed a handful of paper off the desk and a few sheets of paper, but before she managed to fill the cart an idea came to her.

Daryl was a very shy man who was very uncomfortable with people hearing him read, so why not just base his lessons in the library instead of on the perch? It was a secure, quiet place where the others didn't visit, so there was no need for him to worry about the others laughing at him. This idea seemed almost perfect to Carol, so without delay she piled the books on the table making a mini wall and then placed the papers behind the wall with a few pencils, the pencils needed sharpening. She left that job for Daryl, when he would finally return, sharpening a few pencils with his knife would give him time to rest during sessions.

That was if he even accepted, but Carol wasn't going to think like that, of course he'd want to learn to read properly. Daryl just wouldn't admit to it right away, he'd try to shrug the idea off whilst secretly itching to get started. Carol smiled a little sadly when everything was set up, she wished he was there to share her pride. She just wanted him to be there.

Carol had no clue where Daryl was at that moment. He could have been sat somewhere just staring out at the world. He could have been stabbing and hacking Walkers to pieces six miles away by now, or maybe he was on his way to Woodbury. Maybe he'd tracked Merle far in to the woods and they'd had it out, fought until one of them was bleeding on the floor and then like brothers would, picked each other back up. For all she knew Daryl could have been dead. Or dying.

That thought was immediately pushed away as she left the library pulling her cart now containing just one book, the one she had started before Daryl interrupted her in the laundry room the first time, the book he used to openly show her his problem with words. Carol wanted to finish that book and answer his question, to tell him where it was good or bad, to recommend it to him when he had spare time. She wanted to move on to another book so when he visited her in the laundry room, Carol could tell him all about it as they sat shoulder-to-shoulder on the bench.

As she sat on the bench in the laundry room fully prepared to crack the book open she felt a small twinge of pain in her back, a pain she knew wasn't really her own. It was his pain. Within seconds of the pain arriving she burst in to tears dropping the book to the floor, she had become so in tune with Daryl, Carol knew when he was in pain without him having to show it. Carol didn't have to see the man to know he was probably stiff and achy, the redneck didn't have to utter a word of pain or discomfort for her to just know he needed her help. Their body's were so connected and their nervous systems were so incredibly entwined that they could feel each other's pain.

Carol sat there and sobbed for quite some time, the only other sounds she could hear was the dull roar of the washing machines vibrating against the floor. She wondered if Daryl knew she was crying and stopped for a little while, trying to understand the feeling of helplessness that washed over them both. Trying to understand the substantial grief that for a moment took over both their bodies.

The woman sat on the bench, her fingers twitching painfully as his might. She wanted to lay him down on his bed and work his pain away, Carol wanted to kiss his torn skin and tell him everything was going to be okay. She wanted to see Daryl let down his guard in front of her, his eyes going from glazed over and hard to soft and agonising, not many people ever got to see those eyes. Daryl's real eyes.

She let out a heavy gasp and wiped her eyes on her forearm before picking her book up again, Carol was determined to get through the next few lonely days without another incident like that, Daryl would be just fine. He would come back in a couple of days with a new sense of purpose, he'd be somewhat at peace with himself, hopefully.

Just a few pages in to the book someone knocked at the door of the laundry room making her groan in irritation, for a fleeting second Carol wondered if it might be Daryl, but by the shape and form of the shadow she knew it wasn't him. It was Axel. That man gave Carol the creeps, the way he hit on her after determining she wasn't a lesbian, the way he was trying it on with Beth made her want to throw up. Beth was just a child, what on earth would possess anyone to try to make a move on a child?

Carol never told Daryl when Axel had been hitting on her, she knew he'd fly off the handle and probably flatten Axel for even thinking about it. Seemingly Daryl knew about Axel's attraction to her, which is why Daryl closed the shower room door and managed to sneak a peek at her naked.

"Carol, are you alright in there?" Axel called out knocking on the door again when she didn't reply. She sighed and rubbed her forehead as she considered ignoring him, but it was too late, he knew she was in there so there was no escape.

"Yes. I'm fine." She called back hoping she didn't look like she had been crying too hard. Not because she was embarrassed, because Axel never really got the point when she told him to go away, if he thought she was distraught he would hover around trying to get it on. Carol sat there in silence clutching the book to her chest just praying the man would walk away, but then the door slid open and the man with his ridiculous facial hair stuck his head through. Axel smiled and it made her feel sick, his smile didn't settle well with her, it was not Daryl's smile. Axel did not have Daryl's smirk, there was no mischievous glittering in his eyes like the redneck's, all that was in Axel's eyes was the need to repopulate the earth.

Axel walked in slowly and closed the door before sliding on to the bench beside her, Carol automatically shuffled away to put some distance between them as she stared at the page, if he thought she was busy he might eventually get the picture and get lost. "I thought I heard you crying, you sure your okay?" He asked reaching out to touch her arm.

Carol tensed a little but forced herself to relax so he didn't pick up on it. "I'm fine, just need some time alone." She said willing the man to leave her alone, to leave the laundry room and go back to his cell block with the others. Axel did not seem to get it and squeezed her forearm gently.

"Where's your crazy redneck boyfriend?" He asked looking down at the book she was pretending to read, he then looked back up at her and noticed Carol's eyes did not move. Axel knew she was not really reading the book, she was purposely ignoring him but that was not going to deter him. "Haven't seen him for a little while." Axel was hoping Carol would say she told Daryl to take a hike, or that he'd left the group permanently because he didn't appreciate Carol enough. It was obvious to everyone but the convict Carol was not interested, that and everyone else knew Daryl had not gone far.

Carol lifted her head and brushed the man's hand off her arm, she refused to meet the man's eyes in case he got the wrong idea. In case he thought she was hitting on him, that would be terrible for her, Axel would follow her like a lost puppy. That must have been how Daryl felt when she followed him around, she didn't mean to be like a second shadow, she just enjoyed being around him. Even when Daryl was furious his company made her feel a little better. "Daryl's... gone to hunt for a few days." She whispered, Carol was pretty sure Axel didn't believe her but she didn't care, Axel was not wanted there.

"You see I thought maybe you both had a fight or something and he left, that would be interesting." The dull vibrating of the washing machine stopped, giving Carol an excuse to get away from Axel and his sickening advances, she just wanted and needed space between them. But he didn't seem to understand that, Axel stood and followed Carol to the washing machine, standing closer than she felt comfortable with. She could feel the man's breath on the back of her neck sending shivers down her spine, not in the same way as Daryl did. Daryl's shivers made her want to melt in his arms, his hot breath on her neck made her want to do things she knew his body and mind wouldn't be able to handle, but Axel... his breath made her entire body tense and bile rise in her throat. Carol launched the clothes in to the tumble dryer on the other side of the room as fast as she could, the sooner she got these clothes dried and folded, the quicker she could get out of there away from the creepy man stood beside her. "By the way you was cryin', I figured maybe he left ya fer good. Figured you needed a shoulder to cry on and such..." He said taking a tiny step towards her.

Carol smiled awkwardly and stepped away, grabbing the cart and pulling it towards the dryer. "I don't need a shoulder, Daryl's coming back in a couple of days, if I needed to offload there are plenty of Walkers outside I can use to de-stress." Carol said with a little irritation in her voice, when would this man learn she was never even going to look his way.

Axel was about to reply when someone behind them cleared their voice, Hershel. How had he managed to get all the way down to the laundry room with one leg and two crutches? All without making a sound. He wasn't exactly the man she had been hoping for but at that moment anyone way better than Axel.

"I was looking to see if you grabbed one of my shirts." He said pointedly to Carol as he hobbled his way in, he completely ignored Axel as he made his way to the bench and sat down, dropping his crutches on the ground to show Axel he had no intention of leaving. So Axel either sat down and dropped the advances or left all together, to Carol's great relief the unwanted man choose option 2, he left the laundry room with little more than a grunt of irritation. "Wanted to come down see how you were doing, saw him follow you down here. I knew as soon as Daryl walked out those gates he'd try to get his way." Carol gave her saviour a tight-lipped smile and sat beside him, she found herself fiddling with her fingers the way she'd seen her redneck do hundreds of times, in an attempt to distract herself from Daryl she rubbed her chin absently. Just like Daryl did. Hershel seemed to notice the woman's actions and adopted a rueful smile. "You're jus' like him, you know."

Carol sighed and met Hershel's eyes, her red-rimmed ones filling up again almost instantly. "He's only been gone a day, I miss him like crazy. Can't stop wondering if he's hurt or if he's... dead. I just wish he would come back, I let him walk out of those gates and now I want him to walk back again, I want him to come back as he used to be."

Hershel slid his arm around Carol's shoulder in support, he understood exactly what she meant. "Everybody wants him to come back alive and...well. We want Daryl to come back a million times saner than when he left, not just for his sake but yours too. It can't be easy to see he man you care about go through all of that anguish, it can't be easy coping on your own." Carol looked Hershel in the eye and could see the pity and empathy he held for her, she didn't want his pity. Carol didn't help Daryl through his issues and then complain to others because the topics were always heavy and upsetting.

But in the same way Hershel was right. Carol had spent so much time recently taking care of Daryl when and where he needed it, that she'd been neglecting herself a little, during her free time instead of trying to relax or find something useful to do, she was always checking up on Daryl. As much as she wanted to take care of the redneck man, constantly dealing with his unstable emotions were stressful for them both. It must have been hard for the rest of the group to see too, but nowhere near as difficult as it was for Carol. She had to continually monitor what she was saying in case she upset or offended him, she had to watch for signs of him feeling uncomfortable and try not to touch him, otherwise Daryl would freak out and they would both end up back at square one. "It's hard, I've got to constantly watch what I'm doing and what I say. I don't want to hurt him." Carol said gently dropping her hands in her lap. "I know you aren't a real doctor but... do you think he'll be alright, I mean is he going to be this way forever?"

Hershel shook his head making her feel a little better, he wasn't a qualified doctor but he knew plenty about overcoming adversity. "He's a tough man, eventually his emotions will start fixing themselves. Just a guess but I imagine he's never been able to talk about his feelings and his past before, even after he tried to take his own life, all those years of pain and agony are going to take a while to sort out." He said gently squeezing her shoulders. "His mind is like a file cabinet, he's had it all well organised until now, it's kind of like someone has run in and thrown the memories around. Disorganised them so badly he can't cope with it."

Carol nodded at the man's analogy of Daryl and his thoughts, his memory and his pain. Hershel seemed to recognise Daryl's kind of personal trauma, it was like he'd been through some kind of pain himself so he could empathise with him. Carol had no idea exactly what Hershel had been through himself and she knew it probably wasn't as horrifically severe as what happened to Daryl, but it was enough to deal significant pain. "I wish there was something I could do, something to just make it easier on him. He deserves that much."

Hershel sat beside Carol for a while silently pondering on her situation with the man she adored, he allowed her to vocalise every concern she had, every worry or fear she carried for the missing man. Whether the worries were for his mental state or if it was just a concern about Walkers getting their undead hands on her Georgian countryman.

The groups doctor watched the woman stand up, moving away from the bench to the dryers. She pulled the clothes she'd washed and folded them up, placing them back in to the cart ready to take them back to their owners. Carol gently folded Lori's clothes and separated them with T-Dog's keeping them on one-side of the cart, everybody elses clothes went on the other side. Carol faltered a little when she came across Daryl's now cleaner but still roughed up shirt, she stared at it for a second before folding it and neatly placing it in the cart. When everything else was put away she slowly pulled the slightly worn poncho out of the tumble dryer, it was still reasonably warm when she yanked it out of the machine, but instead of placing it with the other clothes, Carol bundled it over her head and smoothed the material down.

Carol wordlessly turned back to Hershel who faintly smiled as he picked his crutches back up, the pair took their time making their way back to the cell block, neither of them wanted to run in to Axel on the way back. They didn't want to end up bumping in to him or Walkers. Carol was unsure which one would be worse.

She slowly walked with Hershel trying to waste time and make the day pass faster, it was only a few minutes she managed to lose, but it was a few minutes she did not have to think about Daryl. During that time she only had to worry about Hershel following her back, making sure he didn't lose his balance or drop one of his crutches. She wasn't sure if she'd be able to carry Hershel back to the cell block, even if he was lighter because of his missing leg.

But when Carol got back to the perch, the ache in her chest returned, the empty bed on the floor did nothing to relieve her pain. Carol wished the man was there waiting for her, his little smirk inviting her in to bed, get her to lie down beside him and sleep. Or just lie next to each other, say nothing. Do nothing. Just lie there.

It wasn't often the group could take time like that, they didn't get to have lazy days where they could just rest, not like in the past where they could have done whatever they wanted.

Carol handed everybody their clothes back. Not a single person mentioned her wearing Daryl's poncho, if it had been under any other circumstances they may of poked fun at her and giggled playfully, but this was different. The man whose clothes she was wearing was out in the woods wandering around in danger, she was afraid he might not ever come back, Carol was just wearing his clothes to make herself feel better. She didn't want to feel lonely anymore so she'd thrown it on while he was gone.

Rick watched the woman go about her business, she looked like she'd been crying, but he didn't dare mention it. If Carol broke down in to tears, he knew he would soon follow, if he was going to cry it was going to be elsewhere. While he was alone preferably. The group didn't need to see anymore despair, Carl didn't need to see his Father losing his mind because of grief.

Carol slowly walked around the block for a while, keeping the end of the poncho screwed up in her fists, she wanted something to do that didn't require letting go of the material. Everything meant letting go of the material, letting go meant the pain would grow in her heart until it hurt too much, so she held on until her fingers ached horrifically. Carol leant against the railings of the catwalk and watched everyone move around on the bottom floor, doing whatever they had to. She didn't feel up to any more conversation so she headed downstairs to the cell closest to the door and grabbed a rifle, that way she could either relieve whoever was on watch in the guard tower or lap the perimeter, giving herself some time to be alone.

When she finally made her way outside to the guard tower she had to suck in a deep breath at the sight of Michonne stood at the tower. That woman made Carol unbelievably uncomfortable, she was everything... Daryl used to be. She was cold, harsh and snappy. She wasn't as volatile as he used to be and Michonne certainly wasn't as aggressive, but Carol knew she had those abilities just under the surface of her skin, she could become a killing machine just like Daryl at any time.

Carol climbed the guard tower and opened the door to the balcony, one hand holding the rifle and the other clutching Daryl's poncho, she told Michonne she was going to take over. For a tense moment Michonne stared at her, glaring at her and then what she was wearing, she obviously knew it belonged to Daryl. Daryl and Michonne hadn't really seen eye-to-eye since she arrived, they always kept their distance and gave cold hard glares whenever they got too close, it was like they were so similar if they actually clashed one day there would be a completely different kind of war. The kind that would result in someone getting seriously injured or worse.

"Haven't seen your boyfriend around since his brother left." She said slowly moving from her spot towards the door.

Carol felt her spine tingle because of the way she spoke, a certain venom and anger she held especially for Daryl. She wasn't entirely sure what made her so angry at him in specific, but she seemed mad at him constantly. Maybe the knew each other in the past, or maybe Michonne's run-in with Merle made her think Daryl was exactly the same. "He's out hunting."

Michonne scoffed as she reached the door. "So that's what he told you, don't be surprised if he doesn't come back, brothers like those don't leave each other easily." She closed the door and disappeared in to the guard tower, leaving Carol stood mortified. Would Daryl really leave her? After everything they had been through together? After throwing Merle out of the prison and telling him he never wanted to see him again? Would Daryl really jet off with his brother after his own brother said he should have died?

Carol turned from the door to face the front gates, she held the poncho tightly in her fist as she paced the balcony. She paced the balcony for at least three hours before Andrea came to relieve her of duty. Carol wasn't seen by anyone until later that night. She walked in to the cell block, completely ignoring everyone around her as they asked where she'd been and just climbed in to the bed she shared with Daryl, hugging his poncho tightly to her chest all night.


	13. Chapter 13

"She's been in and out for the past couple of days." That was the first thing Carol heard as she stirred from her sleep, she recognised the voice but couldn't quite put her finger on who it was. It was just a blurry voice floating around in her head.

The next voice seeped in and she knew exactly who it was. "What's wrong with her?" She cracked an eye open and peered up at the man, staring down at her were the most divine mix of cerulean blue and silver eyes, the contained a hint of surprise. But she didn't have long to stare in to them, the eyes pulled away and swapped with those of another man. The man Carol guessed to be Hershel was talking but she had tuned out his voice and was solely focusing on Daryl.

Carol squirmed and pushed herself to the end of the bed, she had to get to him, had to take one more look at the man who'd been gone far too long. She reached the edge and gripped the end ignoring Hershel's voice to find Daryl. Carol's head pounded at each movement and the dull ache that covered her body became worse, she found herself coughing as someone rushed in and grabbed her, stopping the woman from tumbling to the floor.

The arm that grabbed her was strong and familiar, Carol used a hand to grab at the arm and hold herself up. "Daryl..." She whispered feeling her throat burn as she used her voice. When did she get so sick? Carol could remember feeling a little rundown but she figured it was a side effect of feeling lonely.

"Yeah, its me. Lie down 'fore ya hurt yerself." He said gently pushing her back on to the bed, she didn't notice at first but when she lay down and saw the top bunk above her, Carol knew she was in one of the cells. "Gonna get some water, ya need it." Daryl said trying to pull away from her, but Carol grabbed at his hand pulling him back. She knew being in one of the cells was probably making Daryl uncomfortable but she needed him there, he'd been gone too long for her to cope with.

"Don't go..." Carol whispered.

The redneck man sighed and moved back beside her, she could feel his tension and worry but had so little energy she couldn't make it better, Carol couldn't make him feel better. She heard Daryl call to someone outside asking them to get some water but she was unsure who he asked or what they replied with.

Hershel kept trying to ask her questions but Carol couldn't tear her eyes away from the delicious blue eyes staring back at her. The older man nudged Daryl with his elbow to get his attention, Carol watched Daryl turn to the other man making the large bruise on his face evident. Was that from Merle? The elder brother had grabbed Daryl particularly hard as well as slapping him twice, could Merle have done any more damage? Did they meet back in the woods and end up fighting?

Carol slowly lifted her free hand and gently stroked the dark knot with her fingers, Daryl's head snapped around and grabbed her hand. Something flashed in his eyes for a few seconds before he quelled it, Daryl slid his fingers through the sick woman's and pulled her hand away from his cheek. "You feelin' 'kay?" The redneck asked, it had originally been Hershel's question but both the men had worked out, she was not listening. Carol could only hear what she wanted too, his voice was all she could hear.

"My head hurts." Carol mumbled allowing her eyes to close. For the first time since Daryl had left she felt a little more comfortable, she was not feeling much better in the way of her illness, but his presence made all her worries disappear. "Just need to sleep for a while."

Daryl nodded and looked towards Hershel, giving him a non-verbal hint. They needed some time to themselves, the pair needed some privacy. Carol glanced at the other man and watched him slowly stand with his crutches, she saw Daryl keep a sharp eye on the older man, he did not want the man to fall and get hurt.

As soon as Hershel reached the cell door, Daryl turned his attention back to Carol watching her shuffle and listened to her whimper. The woman's sickness was making her fidgety, Daryl felt bad for her, he didn't know how to make her feel better. He glanced at the bowl of water by his feet and the soaked rag floating on the surface, Daryl snatched the cloth up in his hand, after wringing out the excess water he draped it over her forehead. Patting her head gently to cool her burning skin, Hershel had mentioned something about a fever that broke in the night, but he hadn't been paying much attention. Mentions of influenza. Or something like that, Daryl was more interested in Carol than talking about her, he knew he should not have left. He felt there was something not right, something kept telling him to head back to the prison and check on her, but instead he stayed out there. Soul searching.

Daryl watched the woman's eyes flutter open and felt a little embarrassed, it wasn't usually him taking care of people who were sick, he never really took care of anybody but himself. "Doc says you got the flu or somethin'." Daryl said quietly leaning in to hear her voice, she couldn't speak too much or too loud. He squeezed her fingers gently, while continuing to wipe her head with the rag.

She stared at him with heavy eyes, she could see him rocking backwards and forwards slightly showing he was in pain. Sleeping out in the trees must have been excruciating. "Your back..." Carol whispered wanting nothing more than to get up and tug his shirt off, she wanted to press her hands in to his skin and feel the muscles flex under his skin. She wanted to feel Daryl arching in to her touch and hear him groaning in pleasure.

The redneck scoffed and rolled his eyes at the woman, he didn't know if she'd catch it. "Don't worry 'bout me. Jus' worry 'bout gettin' better, you hear?" Daryl whispered dropping the rag in to the water and pushing it aside with one booted foot. Even when she was ill the woman still insisted on fussing over him, wasn't it Carol who needed plenty of attention right now? Sure, Daryl's back was aching but he was used to that pain by now, it was no worse than usual. He could cope.

Carol's empty hand stretched out to wrap around her aching throat, hoping it would shift some of the pain as she spoke. "Are you... better?" She asked gently not wanting to upset the man if he was still feeling rough. Carol was taken back by the little smile that appeared on his face, she didn't expect something so soft. So heartfelt.

That smile showed Carol he was feeling brighter and less conflicted than before, maybe he was not completely settled emotionally yet, but he was better. "Talk 'bout it when ya better." He replied very carefully squeezing Carol's delicate fingers again. Carol nodded and took one final glance in his amazingly clear eyes before a strange feeling began to overwhelm her, Carol all of a sudden felt exhausted, the ache in her bones became an envelope pulling her in to the darkness. "Time fer sleep woman, ya look shattered."

Carol didn't have to see it to know Daryl had pulled the sheets up around her, chuckling as he made sure his poncho was tucked in properly to stave off the cold. Despite during breaking a fever the woman was shivering so in an attempt to keep her warm, Daryl slowly and carefully slid himself on to the bed behind her. He wrapped a strong arm around her and used the other as a pillow, he was a survivor, he knew staying warm sometimes meant sharing body heat and he had plenty of that. His skin was like a permanent furnace at the best of times.

Daryl dragged the tiny shaking woman as close as he could and buried his nose in to the back of her neck, he didn't care that she was sticky from sweat, he just wanted to hold her. Being alone out there made him realise exactly how much he wanted to be with her, Daryl wanted Carol to be part of his life, to fill the gap left in his heart by the lack of love he felt all his life. Carol was willing to love him in a way that suited them both, the woman was able to see things even he couldn't bear to see in himself, Carol made Daryl understand himself.

This woman had waltzed in to his life at the most inconvenient time, but that didn't seem to repel her at all, if anything it drew her in closer. Every time he tried to head for the hills the woman latched on to his heels and held him back, he couldn't find a way to break off from her, but maybe that was because he didn't want to any more. Daryl was no longer afraid of somebody getting close to him, he was no longer afraid of feeling an attachment to someone else and he no longer felt like the carpet was going to be swept out from under his feet and make him lose everything. Nobody in the prison wanted to hurt him. In fact, it was the complete opposite, everyone here wanted to be his friend or at least be on civil terms with him.

He wasn't sure how he felt about everyone knowing he had issues but they'd all worked it out by now, so he had no say in the matter any more, but at least these people he lived with were not repulsed or annoyed by his problems. Daryl had finally admitted to himself that was what they were, problems. Issues. He had these issues since he was a child making them almost as permanent as his scars, they meant he couldn't handle relationships and had clear set limits on his social abilities. But he was a Dixon and Dixon's were stubborn, if he wanted to overcome these problems he would.

But to overcome this, he had to let people in. Most importantly the men, Daryl had to learn to trust the men in their group as much as the women, he had to stop believing they were a threat and start believing they were his friends. His family.

Daryl watched Carol as she pushed herself back against his body and sighed quietly trying to find comfort, the man didn't even think as he kissed the skin he pressed against, the reaction to her presence just became natural. He felt a lot more at ease when Carol's breathing began to get a little heavier, he knew from personal experience, sleep was the perfect remedy for illness and injury.

Carol wasn't sure exactly when Daryl got up and left the cell but she knew it was pretty early. She had felt him shuffle off the bed at some point but she was just so exhausted she couldn't open her eyes. Carol knew sleeping in the cell was too much for him, his claustrophobia had become pretty intense after their stint in the closet. Daryl had left but kept coming back every so often to check on her, to make sure she was well and mending. Even in her sleep she could hear his breathing when he was near, she knew when he was close by the warmth that wrapped around her limbs.

The woman threw her arm over the edge of the bed and reached for the bottle of water Daryl had placed beside her, she sighed uncomfortably and stretched until her fingers grazed the lid of the canteen. Carol didn't expect the bottle to fall over and clatter against the floor.

It took a few seconds for someone to appear in the doorway looking panicked. Beth rushed in to the cell and picked the bottle up, unwinding the lid the girl handed the bottle over and watched the sick woman drink from it. When the bottle was empty Carol placed it on the mattress beside her and held a hand out to Beth, silently asking for the girls help. Without a word Beth took Carol's hand and slowly pulled her up off the bed, the older woman took a moment to get her balance and stop her head from spinning, she knew if it was Daryl who'd stopped at the door there was no way he'd let her get up.

Beth helped Carol get to her feet safely before walking with her to the cell door, they were both immediately met by the cold hard glare of an angry Dixon. He did not look impressed.

Daryl took Carol's elbow knowing he had a much better grip then Beth had anyway, if she fell Daryl could catch her unlike Beth, who would end up dropping her. Beth slowly shied away from the pair, the redneck's steely eyes making her squirm.

"What you doing outta bed?" He asked slugging his crossbow over his shoulder to free up his hand, he placed that hand on her other elbow to secure his hold. "You're gon' get more sick!"

Carol couldn't help but smile at the man, despite his hardened glare the man was still fussing. She glanced over his shoulder at his crossbow and felt something close to pride and happiness swell in her chest. Daryl had spent a long time wishing he could get hold of it again, he had wanted to get back out and hunt since the day he broke his knuckles, for a little while Daryl felt helpless and thought he'd never be able to get back out there again.

To see the man holding on to his prized possession for the first time in weeks made her feel a little happier. Carol knew Daryl was probably feeling the exact same thing. "Had enough of those four walls." Carol whispered back while gently gripping his waist, her fingers fisting the material of his shirt as she closed her eyes. If Hershel had heard Carol say that, she knew he would mention her even beginning to sound like Daryl.

"Ya can sleep out 'ere if ya want." Daryl said taking a step back to lead her to where they usually slept, he wanted to let her lie back down straight away but she shook her head. Carol carefully stepped forward so she could wrap her arms around the man, he was the only medicine Carol needed.

Daryl seemed to realise that and with a hefty sigh he gripped the woman in a comforting hug, his hands pressed against her shoulder blades to hold her close. The warmth of his body served to keep her toasty, she was no longer feverish so now her body felt colder than it actually was. Carol snuggled herself in to him like a child making Daryl fight away a tiny smirk as he kissed the top of her head. "What are ya doin' t' me woman?" He whispered in to the woman's hair as he held her. Daryl was not the hugging relationship kind of man, this was freakishly unnatural. He didn't usually like to show his feelings and emotions, but with Carol he wasn't even afraid to show her how he felt.

Daryl still didn't like to broadcast his feelings in front of the group, but he wasn't so closed off and opposed to the idea. With the rest of their group busy doing other tasks he felt pretty comfortable holding his woman.

"I'm not doing anything, its you." She whispered gently glancing up at him to see his reaction. He looked down at her in silence as if he was thinking about her words, Daryl looked confused for a second before shaking it off, he finally understood what she was saying. Because Daryl was now willing to let the woman in he was changing, Daryl's mind was no longer resisting the emotions that come with friendships and other relationships. The opening in his heart made him kiss the top of her head without any qualms.

He smirked and let his forehead touch hers, she felt a little clammy and sticky because she had not showered since she got sick, but Daryl wasn't really bothered. When he went hunting he was always hot and sticky, that never irritated Carol so it should not irritate him. "Better not ge'mme sick." He said feeling her breath ghost his lips, he wanted to capture those lips but he could not risk becoming unwell. "Already got me drunk once." Carol giggled lightly but immediately stopped when Daryl's mouth pressed against her neck, she squeezed at his waist and let her eyes flutter closed. Her heart was pounding at the feeling of him lightly kissing her neck.

"Didn't get you d-drunk." Carol stuttered feeling the man's arms secure around her for a few seconds before he pulled away, Daryl chuckled as Carol groaned at him for pulling away. She did not want him to stop, but by the way she was swaying he knew she needed to get some more rest, probably some food too.

Daryl carefully guided the woman further in to the perch so she could lie down on their mattress, Carol's eyes never left him as she lay down and let him fuss over her. The whole time he kept his crossbow on his shoulder like he had missed it, Daryl pulled the sheets up to her waist and brushed her head. "Get somebody t' send ya some food, water. I'm headin' out fer 'while, gotta get some practice in." Daryl said shrugging his shoulder to put emphasis on his weapon. He had spent so long away from the device he thought he might of been out of practice, he also needed to test the strength of his fingers, the man's broken knuckles meant he had to adjust his control on the crossbow at least until he was completely healed.

"Stay safe." Carol whispered reaching up to brush his jaw with her fingers, he smiled a little and kissed the end of her fingers when they traced his lips. The chapped, dry lips made her smile through her exhaustion. They described Daryl's personality perfectly. The chapped-ness resembled the man's pain and his scars, much like his lips the pain could be healed and the lack of moisture resembled his dry personality. His dry personality was just on the surface and after a little help his true potential could be seen.

Daryl grinned and fiddled with the material of his poncho. "Hurry up, 'n' get better..." He said leaning down to whisper in her ear as someone passed behind them. "Like t' see ya in jus' that poncho one day." As soon as those words left his mouth, Daryl was up and gone heading for the cell block door. Did Daryl actually just say that out loud? The same Daryl Dixon that could barely handle holding her hand without getting in to a panic, the man who freaked out at any slightly wayward touch.

Obviously spending a few days out in the wilderness had done the man some good, he might have been a little stiff and achy due to hiding in trees but at the same time, disappearing out there for a while helped him find the balance he needed. His erratic emotions seemed to settle down for a little while and at the same time his confidence had returned. Daryl had never been overconfident or arrogant when it came to his abilities, but he always knew exactly what he could and couldn't do.

This side of Daryl had never reared his head before, it was obvious to her Daryl had a sexual side, after all he was a man. But she had never seen it before, because of his lack of relationships and his virginity, the man had never even made a snide sexual remark before. Not like Merle. The new side of Daryl was exciting and oddly flattering. It showed Carol exactly how comfortable he was with her and how confident he felt in their recently started relationship, the man was not embarrassed or afraid of telling her what he wanted any more. He felt empowered. Daryl knew the woman didn't have any concerns when it came to his lack of sexual experience, or his inexperience with relationships in general.

Maybe the fact he had no experience with that kind of stuff meant she wouldn't expect too much from him, Carol wouldn't expect him to be amazing in bed and wouldn't suddenly lose interest in him because he wasn't perfect.

It wasn't like they were going to start getting crazy with each other in the prison anyway. A prison wasn't exactly anybody's idea of a romantic place, it was not his idea of the perfect place to give yourself to someone, not that Daryl was in to any of that romantic shit. He'd do nice stuff for the woman if that was what she wanted or needed, like the time he picked the Cherokee Rose, he just didn't know how to be romantically spontaneous without real cause. Daryl didn't understand spontaneity.

Carol listened to the sound of the cell door slamming closed and let herself fall asleep waiting for Daryl to come back. Carol could remember at some point Andrea came up to the perch with something for her to eat and some water, she couldn't really remember how much she ate and drank or even what she ate, but she could remember falling back to sleep clinging to his clothing.

During her sleep another person came up to the perch, probably to take the dish away and fill her canteen again, Hershel was insistent Carol kept drinking plenty of water. Fluid was important especially during and after a fever, if she got dehydrated, then she would eventually get more sick. That would be disastrous.

Carol found herself being woken up a few more times during the day, each time by somebody other than the person she was waiting for. Hershel had climbed up on to the perch and repeatedly poked her with a crutch until she woke up, Carol wasn't able to pay much attention to the old man before falling back to sleep. Sleeping was the only thing she could do that didn't require using energy.

Daryl had been out in the woods most of the day and by the time he got back he was a mess. He was sweaty, mucky and covered in blood, there was no way he was going to sleep in that state. Not right next to a woman who was sick, all that stuff could make her worse, it wasn't fair to make her more sick then she already was.

Despite wanting to go straight to the perch after dinner Daryl headed to the shower block, he immediately spotted his open bottle of shower gel and smirked. He only left for a couple of days and Carol had missed him so much she was using his shower gel and wearing his clothes. That was something he had never experienced before... being missed, it was a foreign feeling. Knowing someone wanted him around was so unusual and so different that he couldn't decide if he enjoyed it or not.

When Daryl left the shower block he felt a million times cleaner and ten times better, as much as he enjoyed getting his freedom back it came at a price. The constant weight of his crossbow and the strength it required to pull the string played havoc on his healing hands. His fingers were aching something chronic and his back wasn't much better. Daryl slowly shuffled his way from the showers to the cell block, not really taking much notice of the others and headed for the perch. Sleep was pretty high on his agenda right then, all the fresh air had really knocked it out of him.

Daryl stopped on the stairs to see Carol just lying on their bed sleeping very lightly. He knew she was not properly sleeping because as soon as he began to take his shirt off she stirred and looked up at him. She seemed surprised to see him removing his shirt in full view of everyone but neither of the pair said a word. Carol just watched the man as he slid down on to the mattress beside her so he could grab a little sleep before going out on watch, she saw him drag his crossbow so it rested just within reaching distance and turned to look back at her.

Carol smiled softly as her arm wrapped around his waist, Daryl didn't even flinch when her fingers ghosted the birthmark he inherited from his mother and the scars he inherited from his father, he just made himself that bit more comfortable and closed his eyes.


	14. Chapter 14

**Okay, so I've moved the story on about two years since the last chapter and despite what our poor Daryl goes through in this chapter, the last few will show exactly how Daryl has moved on. It'll show his relationship with Carol and the others before I finish up.**

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Carol watched Daryl shuffle as he opened his eyes, his body was aching all over and his chest burned every time he took a breath. He'd felt better but then again he had felt worse, Daryl lifted a hand to rub his face but pulled away quickly feeling an unnatural sting, he flinched a little when Carol batted his hand away.

"Don't touch it, you'll make it bleed again." She whispered picking up a wet rag and placing it against his burning cheek as she stared down at him, he looked a little confused and maybe concussed. Daryl's eyes were glassy and his pupils unusually wide, that was probably something to do with the amount of painkillers Hershel had given him, the extent of his injuries were pretty bad and she knew without the medication Daryl would be in agony.

The man very slowly scanned his surroundings, he didn't look like he was really taking any of it in, he was just casting his eyes around. Carol watched his heavy eyes and tried not to be to concerned by his behaviour, he had been through a lot the past couple of days so being a little out of character was permitted. It was the first time he woke up since falling unconscious nearly four days ago and despite sleeping that long he still looked exhausted, Carol watched him lick his lips and wince at how cracked, dry and split they were. She followed his eyes as they dropped down beside her and saw his fingers stretching out from under his blanket towards the canteen of water. "Thirsty?" Carol asked trying not to sound too patronising as she unscrewed the top and slowly lifted his head to pour a little in his mouth, she wasn't surprised by the way he just greedily kept drinking until there was nothing left. "I'll get you some more in a minute, drink too much and you'll get sick."

She carefully lay his head back down on the pillow someone had given him, one of the newest members of the group had it and decided his needs for the object were more pressing. Even though Daryl didn't speak he seemed to notice the pillow and frowned a little in confusion. "It's on loan from one of the others, when she saw you lying on just the bed, she gave the pillow up for you." Carol said, she didn't know if he had kept up during all of that but it was just to help him understand.

"Look like... fuckin'... charity case?" The redneck whispered slowly in a hoarse and painful voice, Carol couldn't help but giggle as he closed his eyes and smirked weakly, he wasn't too out of character. "Wha' happened?" He asked feeling some of the pain begin to set in.

Carol sighed sadly and gently shifted strands of hair away from his eyes, when he was well again she was going to cut that, he could barely see where he was going any more. She'd seen Daryl rub his face constantly to get it out-of-the-way. "Don't you remember?" Carol asked, she didn't expect him to remember much of anything at the moment, so when he shook his head she wasn't shocked. "A group came in through the back of the prison, lots of men carrying guns and baseball bats, one of them was fiddling with the bike. Rick shot two of them but by that time you were already on the floor, one got bit on his way out and the other ran away. Thought we were gonna lose you for a while." Carol felt her heart give out a little, she couldn't imagine a life without Daryl any more. He had become the most vital part of her world.

Daryl grunted in disdain at the thought of these people getting the better of him. "H-how... bad?" He murmured as he tried to lay as still as possible, even the slightest movement on his part made his body scream in pain. Daryl wasn't entirely sure he wanted to know the answer to that question, by the feeling of every single limb on his body it was pretty awful, he couldn't remember ever feeling this rough. He had never felt this bad when he was sick or after he had been beaten by his father.

Carol very gently ran her fingers through his hair to try to comfort him as she pulled the covers up to his chest. "Couple of split ribs and concussion, Hershel thinks your wrist is broken so he made a makeshift splint for now, a lot of really nasty bruising along with a dislocated shoulder and knee. Hershel said you're lucky it wasn't worse, any more blows to the head or your spine, you'd..." The woman trailed off and looked down at her hands, she couldn't bear the thought of losing him after they'd come so far, Carol looked up again when she felt his fingers barely graze her knee. He couldn't move his hands or his arm any farther without feeling searing pain, so Daryl just stuck to touching any part he could reach just to provide her a little comfort and wordlessly tell her, he was going to be okay. "Why don't you get some more rest, I'll get you some water and soup, we'll have you up again in no time." The woman said leaning down slightly to leave a gentle, loving kiss on his lips. In his right mind he would have taken full advantage of that situation but he couldn't even bring himself to kiss her back, it made his body ache too much. The woman found herself licking her own lips after that kiss, his lips really were dry and cracked because he hadn't been able to moisten them while unconscious.

Carol watched the man shuffle and hiss, he was clearly uncomfortable but there was nothing she could do. After they started sharing a bed nearly two years ago, Daryl had spent most nights on his side with his arms wrapped around her, so he wasn't used to lying flat-out on his back for more than two or three hours at a time. There was no way she was going to roll him on to his side, that would just do more damage to Daryl's already broken body.

She watched the man as his pain began become more evident, his muscles were becoming more rigid and tense. Carol wasn't entirely sure what to do for him, if she gave him anymore painkillers he'd overdose and the group would have another issue to deal with, so he'd just have to ride the pain out. Daryl's pained eyes flashed open for a few seconds as he gasped and moments later they rolled back, his head lolled away from her and he was unconscious. Hershel told her Daryl wouldn't be awake for any more than a few minutes at a time until he healed a little more, when he was finally feeling better he'd be able to keep his eyes open for longer. But Carol didn't like seeing her man lying completely unconscious, he was too lifeless and unresponsive and she hated it, Daryl was a man who was constantly moving so being in this condition was just wrong.

For a few days everything panned out this way, he would wake up every couple of hours looking for a little water, some food or the bathroom. Needing the bathroom was hard for Carol to deal with. She would have to call Rick or Glenn in to get him up, hearing Daryl cry out in agony as they dragged him to his feet was horrific, hearing him grumble and gasp for breath was one of the worst things she'd ever experienced.

When the men finally lay Daryl back down on the bed he would wait for them to leave before letting tears he fought to keep in out, in the past when his father beat him he could grab as many high-grade painkillers from Merle's stash as he needed, but now that wasn't possible. The pain was unbearable and he just couldn't handle it, he couldn't keep breathing through it because his fractured ribs wouldn't let him. Carol would hear the man repeatedly mumble about being pathetic for crying, but Carol never disagreed with him or made him stop, this little meltdown was to help him cope with his situation.

Carol would sit beside Daryl every time and wipe away his pain induced tears, whisper encouraging words to stop him losing control and just breaking down. She didn't expect to see him on his feet just a week after he had woken up. The woman headed towards the cell he had been sleeping in and screeched to a halt in the doorway when she spotted him, Daryl was stood holding on to the bunk with the arm that was recovering from dislocation, it looked like he was trying to pull a shirt on but with a fractured wrist and the other arm holding him up, he wasn't having much luck.

"Need some help there?" She asked watching him wobble slightly. He was stood on his one good leg while the other was bent slightly and barely touching the ground, he couldn't put pressure on that knee just yet. Daryl flicked his eyes to her and nodded in silence, by the lack of communication and his tight jaw she knew standing up was causing him pain, but he was too stubborn to stay in bed any longer. That and Daryl had realised he had been in a cell and since that moment he began to get edgier and edgier, Daryl had asked her to move him from the cell a few times since waking up but that was just too much for him.

The woman stepped in to the cell and grabbed the sleeveless shirt he had managed to manipulate over his clunky splint, she couldn't imagine how long he had been trying to get a shirt on. Carol carefully pulled Daryl's shirt up on to his shoulder and left it hanging off his back as she conjured up a plan to get the other arm through the shirt, she didn't want to mention to Daryl that it would have been easier for him to get dressed while sat down instead of struggling, so she gently wrapped an arm around his waist in an attempt to support his weight as she turned him around. As Carol slowly span him around Daryl all but collapsed back on to the bunk and hissed in pain, getting off that leg must have felt good though. "Are you sure you want to be walking around yet Daryl?" Carol asked helping him push his other arm through his shirt.

It took a few seconds for Daryl to respond as he watched Carol get down on to her knees in front of him and gently place her hands on his sides, it looked like she was checking for the bruising but he didn't really care, just the feel of the woman's hands on his skin for the first time in a long time felt good. Carol's tiny hands wrapped around his body as she lightly pressed her thumbs along the bruises to find out how tender they were. "Bored." He said simply, he didn't trust his voice to say anything else in case he ended up swearing or yelling in pain.

Carol's gentle fingers pressed at his ribcage to look for any more cracks, Hershel had shown her exactly where the current cracks were and what they felt like. Carol immediately pulled her hands away from the black and blue bruising the moment Daryl cried out, his body arched slightly making him freeze straight away. After a few seconds his limbs loosened up and he relaxed again. "Prefer ya didn't do that... hurts like shit." He murmured pushing his fingers under the splint to relieve an itch, he saw Carol lift her eyebrows as if she was questioning his actions, Daryl hesitated for a few seconds before pulling his hand away.

"Worse than a kid." Carol said laughing a little when she saw him bristle, it wasn't every day someone told him he was just like a child. He was a man now, not a child. "You ready to give this another go?" The man watched Carol stand up and saw her point to the cell door, he slowly nodded using his almost good arm to jettison himself off the bed, making him stumble straight in to Carol's arms and huff at the brief ache that enveloped him. "You okay?" The woman asked feeling her own chest ache in response to his pain.

Daryl just nodded so Carol manoeuvred herself allowing her to wrap his arm around her shoulders and support his weight, he was going to need someone beside him every time he wanted to go somewhere, Carol gently held his hand and snaked her other arm around his waist lightly. It wouldn't be enough to catch him if he fell but she didn't want to hold on any tighter in case she hurt him. Slowly Carol helped Daryl out of the cell towards the perch the whole time allowing him to set the pace and decide how long this was going to take, part of her wished he would just give in and lie back down because for such a slim built man, he was heavy. But the other part of her wanted him to soldier on. Daryl wasn't the type of man to let other people's actions do any thing other than rile him up so by battling through this it showed her he wasn't taking the beating personal, sure they had attacked him and no one else but it was purely because he was the only person around, the thugs had not turned their weapons on him because they had planned it.

Watching Daryl limping violently towards the stairs showed her that he was not going to become withdrawn and paranoid over the issue, he'd been through enough beatings in his life to know the difference between planned attacks and unplanned. Carol was more than grateful when she managed to wrestle him down the stairs and a new member of the group rushed to help them, she was a little annoyed when Daryl scowled fiercely at the other man and then scoffed at a woman who offered him her seat. As she sat Daryl down, Carol met his eyes showing him exactly how infuriating he could be and saw the way his face changed, he went from defensive to regretful within a few seconds. "Sorry..." Daryl whispered collectively to the three people he had offended, the redneck man wasn't usually the type to apologise to any one but seeing the way he had upset Carol, it made him want to make it better as best he could. And an apology was the only way forward.

In his head Carol knew he was kicking himself for annoying her, but also for apologising, something his brother had distilled in him never to do. Merle would always smack the back of his head if he showed a hint of remorse at any time, he would grab Daryl by the throat when he was high and make him say apologies were for pussies and other awful shit, even as a grown man Daryl knew to do exactly as he was told and show no remorse and no fear in front of Merle.

Daryl watched the woman move from the side of the chair behind him, he felt her hands touch his shoulders gently and then her soft fingers touched the side of his neck. It was enough to make him forget how to breathe, Daryl had missed the feel of Carol's hands on his skin, before his attack they had stopped being so hands on with each other.

There was no particular reason for the icy patch in their relationship for those few months other than stress, little Sophia had gotten pretty sick for a while and nearly didn't make it to her second birthday. So of course Daryl had been freaked out, even though the toddler was not his daughter, he loved her so much that her sickness terrified him. He had to keep functioning during the day but at night, he would just collapse on to the bed beside Carol and fall asleep, that meant they didn't get to have any late night conversation or a few sneaky kisses before going to sleep.

It had been two years since the couple had started indulging in a relationship but they were still at the point of showing hardly any affection in front of the group, it wasn't that Carol wanted to wave their relationship around like a banner, it was just that having Daryl yank himself from her arms every time someone walked by felt bad. It felt like he was ashamed of her. Carol knew that wasn't true, if it was he would not have opened up to her about his history or told her anything about himself.

Daryl sighed softly and tried his hardest not to lean in to her touch, not because he didn't want Carol to keep going but because all of his bones felt like they were grinding together, it was agonising as he fought with his natural reactions. He wanted her to keep lightly massaging his neck, it was helping him relax, it was helping him forget some of the pain. He was glad Carol seemingly noticed his body loosening up, she kissed the top of his head gently as she continued kneading his skin making Daryl feel suddenly very sleepy, but there was no way he was going to sleep once Sophia set her eyes on him.

"Uncle Da!" She practically screamed as Rick carried the little girl in to the cell block, she kicked her legs fiercely so Rick would drop her and then waddled as fast as she could towards him. Daryl automatically tensed as the little girl barreled towards him as if preparing himself for the impact but Andrea jumped in, grabbing the girl around the waist before she collided in to the injured man she hadn't seen in days. Sophia pushed and shoved at Andrea to get to Daryl, but the woman held on tightly explaining to the little girl he was too hurt for her to jump at him, as soon as Andrea mentioned Daryl being hurt the little girl stopped kicking and stared at the man. "Uncle Da?" She whispered as Andrea put Sophia down, letting her walk to Daryl's side and examine his splint. Sophia lifted a hand and gently placed a finger on one of the wooden chunks taped to his wrist. "Was this?" The little girl asked meeting Daryl's eyes with a tiny pout.

The redneck man bit his lip for a few seconds as he thought of something to say, something she'd understand. "Gotta bad arm, baby girl." He whispered reaching over with his good hand to stroke her wild brown hair. Daryl frowned a bit in confusion as Sophia captured his hand before bringing it to her face and placed a little kiss on his palm, as soon as she pulled back and smiled at him he smiled back wishing he could scoop her up and kiss her cheek. This girl was far too adorable for her own good, she didn't realise exactly how soft and mushy she made Daryl feel. It was like all his insides had turned to goo and Sophia made him want to smile so much it sometimes hurt not to.

"Face, ouch?" The girl then said pointing up to him, Daryl slowly nodded not wanting to disrupt Carol's actions as her thumbs dug in to his neck. He knew his face looked pretty awful after catching a glimpse in the cell mirror, hell, he was surprised Sophia had even recognised him. He must have got a boot to the face at some point. Daryl could finally see out of his left eye again but it was pretty blurry at best, his bottom lip was swollen and his lips were split in four different places, Daryl had three fairly deep lacerations to his left cheek and most of his face was bruised or grazed. The man had tried to touch his face a few times in the past week but it was too painful, and even when Carol tried to wipe away the dried up blood it was so painful she had to leave it, a lot of the man's own blood was still stuck on his shredded skin. Sophia glanced from Daryl to Carol who had been silently watching the two interact as she caressed Daryl's skin. "Make Uncle Da better?"

"I'm trying, sweetheart." Carol told the little girl as she looked up with those big brown Lori eyes. Daryl shuffled uncomfortably in the chair when Carol stopped caressing his skin and just rest her hands on him, the woman seemed to notice and squeezed his good shoulder gently, she didn't want to cause him any more pain because he did not deserve it. The man deserved to be well and happy.

Daryl watched Sophia run off to the cell they kept her toys in and come back seconds later with a heavy book in her grasp, Carol caught the book as the little girl flung it on to Daryl's lap in excitement, she obviously didn't understand how bad Daryl's injuries were. Carol tried to tell the little girl to be careful but she just pushed her bottom lip out, making and chastising remark impossible. "Uncle Da, read?" Sophia asked placing a tiny hand on Daryl's knee as she beamed. Daryl sighed and used his good hand to rub the back of his neck in embarrassment.

"Baby girl, I can't read t' ya today. My eye is bad..." The man said trailing slightly as the girl's bottom lip quivered in despair, her eyes filling up with tears as she glanced between her favourite book and her favourite family member. "Please, don't cry, don't like it when ya cry."

Sophia's lip trembled as she stood beside the man, obviously reeling from his rejection. Carol knew that Daryl had refused to read to her not only because of his damaged eye, but because he didn't want the rest of the group to hear him read out loud. Daryl had been learning to read with Carol down in the prison's library and he had done well according to her, Daryl was a fast learner and had grasped the concept pretty quickly, there had been a few times the man had struggled but not many.

The only time Daryl struggled enough to force them to stop the man had an awful day, he had been out hunting but ended up with no animals and a fresh wound on his abdomen, the string on his crossbow snapped whipping him on the stomach. When Carol found him in one of the prison bathrooms nursing the wound he immediately started snapping and freaking out, he was frightened because the wound fell low and some of it was hidden under his waistband, Daryl was too afraid to let her anywhere near the most private part of his body. Carol backed away from the redneck and watched him dab one of the sleeves from his blue and black shirt against the open laceration, the sleeve had been torn off his shirt and soaked in water so Daryl could use it as a rag.

Daryl had demanded Carol left him alone and let him take care of himself, the man headed down to the library a little later and let her check him over, she tried to convince him to let her look at the rest of it but Daryl pushed her hands away and grabbed a book as a distraction.

When Carol heard him stumble over an entire sentence and groan in frustration she tried to calm him down but he just tensed up. She tried to rub his shoulders and his back as she whispered encouraging words but Daryl ended up more angry, he launched the book across the room and stormed off to the perch ignoring everyone around him even ignoring the call for dinner.

Carol took a small plate of dinner up to the hunter and found him sat with his bare back to the stairs and his head in his hands, Daryl silently accepted the food and ate without speaking and barely moving. When he finished dinner the woman lay Daryl down and firmly massaged his back giving him the chance to de-stress so they could talk, the man told her he was pretty sure he saw Merle in forest, as a Walker but he couldn't be sure. He didn't stick around long enough to find out, Daryl could smell the blood trailing down his stomach so he had to go before the Walkers got interested.

Daryl rolled on to his back and stared up at Carol as he chewed his bottom lip, he felt awkward and uncomfortable as he watched her pull her t-shirt off so she could change. Usually Carol would head to one of the cells to get dressed but because the rest of the group were in the cafeteria eating she didn't mind undressing in front of him, Daryl on the other hand was completely embarrassed by his body's natural reaction to the woman and tried to hide it. Poorly. Carol knew straight away what was wrong when the man began fidgeting and despite early reservations, he let her help him out. Letting Carol touch him had been a massive step with his trust issues, he let the woman do things to him that he'd never experienced before and then allowed her to help him through the overwhelming feelings that followed right after. That had been their first sexual encounter of any kind and unlike Carol's expectations Daryl seemed pretty at ease the next day, she thought he might distance himself for a little while so he could adjust but if any thing it made him a little more forward and bolder.

The couple still hadn't gone all the way, but they both knew eventually they'd end up in that position, they just couldn't rush.

Carol watched Rick come closer and sweep his daughter up in to a hug as she clutched the book she loved. "This again?" Rick asked taking it from his little girl, Sophia nodded sadly and buried her face in Rick's neck. The look on the little girls face made Daryl's heart want to break, he felt like he had caused the girl pain and wanted to make it better, but it was impossible. He couldn't read the book to her, he couldn't even let Sophia sit on his lap in case he broke in half. "What's the matter?"

Daryl grunted in pain as he tried to sit himself up properly. "Want's me t' read that fu... book 'gain. Told her can't see too good." The man said repeating what he'd told Sophia earlier except less soft and more man-to-man. Rick nodded and gently brushed his baby daughter's head, pulling her back to look in to the little girls eyes. She was the spitting image of Lori.

"You know Uncle Daryl ain't to well at the moment, I'm sure he'll read with ya as soon as he's better." Rick said offering the girl a little compromise to stop her feeling neglected and abandoned by her favourite member of the group. "Uncle Daryl still cares 'bout you." Rick told his daughter as she let out heavy, unhappy breaths against her father's neck. Sophia pulled back from her father to glance down at Daryl as if she was searching for validation.

Carol smiled when Daryl automatically plastered on a smile despite his pain and guilt. "Course I still care, you're my favourite girl."

Sophia broke in to a smile at Daryl's words and excitedly flung her arms in the air, only stopping when Rick told her it was probably time to take a nap, she pouted and whined but still twisted her body in Rick's arms to face Daryl. This had become a customary routine for Sophia, when ever the little girl had to go to bed she would look for Daryl so she could kiss him goodnight, Rick sighed with a smile and shifted closer to the injured man so the little girl could kiss his face.

Daryl gasped a little when he leaned towards the girl, he smiled when she planted a kiss on his forehead weaving her fist through his hair as she roughly hugged him, it took every ounce of control to stay silent when she held him. It was obvious Rick had noticed his daughter's grip was just a little too tight and careful extracted her from the situation, he worked on distracting her with the book as he carried Sophia away.

Carol was extra gentle when she put her arms around his neck, her grip was loose so she could pull away if it hurt him too much, but Daryl seemed to relax in to her hold and take a few calming breaths. "I'm just a little curious, if Sophia's your favourite girl... where do I fit in?" She whispered in his ear, Daryl slowly turned his head trying to ignore the sharp pains as they shot through his body.

"Woman, ya know exactly where ya fit in. Don't need me t' tell ya." The man whispered back reaching over his shoulder to brush his lightly curled fist against her cheek. "Jus' need t' know that I love ya, 'nd that's it." Carol beamed in response to those special three words and returned the sentiment, she wanted to kiss him every time those words left his mouth, but the man was just too fragile for that. Instead to show her love for him, she grabbed an unused blanket out of the laundry cart and wrapped it around his body. Hoping the cocoon would bring him just a little comfort.

"I'll go get you something to eat, then you can go back to bed. You look exhausted."

Daryl nodded slowly at the woman but as she turned to walk away he caught her fingers with his. "Jus' stay fer five more minutes..." The man trailed a little and swallowed hard finding his display of emotions a little stifling. "... I've missed ya." He whispered honestly watching the woman give him a genuine, adoring smile. She could stay with him for a few minutes if that was what he wanted.


	15. Chapter 15

The group had done well. They had gotten so far. Carol looked around the kitchen that probably once belonged to a family or maybe a young couple, it was a quaint and cute little kitchen belonging to a quaint little house. A simple little set up that contained a gas oven and a little metal pot to make tea or coffee, there was a white fridge that ran on a generator Daryl had fixed up, there were a few wooden cupboards and granite work tops that sparkled as the sunlight shone through the big open window.

Carol felt thrilled more than anything to find pots and pans, china and silverware, but most of all the complete set of chef knives. It was almost like the people who had lived here left everything knowing they were coming, Carol made sure to say a prayer at night thanking everyone for giving them this opportunity.

The little group that lived in a quarry, then on a farm and then in a prison now had this. A row of little two-story houses they had managed to snatch from the clutches of Walkers and secure forever, they were secure forever because she was never going to give her new home up. Never.

Carol hummed a little tune as she grabbed a few beers from the fridge and placed them on a tray, a tray complete with freshly made sandwiches for the hard-working men. She listened to the fridge's generator as it hummed and vibrated against the kitchen floor, originally the sound had annoyed Carol but she had gotten used to it. The same way she discovered when sleeping in a normal bed Daryl tended to fidget and squirm, almost like he was too comfortable in the big bed, that was annoying too but Carol had got used to it. Slowly Carol manoeuvred her way through the kitchen expertly carrying the tray towards the front door. Carol found herself smiling at the sight before her.

In the front garden of her house stood two men and a third man, her man, all covered in oil trying to fix Daryl's bike under the baking sun. Rick and Glenn were both laughing as Glenn readjusted his cap and twirled a spanner in his hand, Carol had obviously missed a pretty funny joke there, even the redneck was laughing.

Glenn seemed to notice Carol stood on the path and rushed to her with a huge grin, and grab two beers, launching one at Rick. Glenn then whistled for Daryl's attention making the man turn around. Carol felt all the air leave her lungs.

Even with the oil smeared over his face and his hair hanging in front of his eyes, he looked incredible. The man in front of her was not the same man she had met, he was so much more.

His beautiful silvery-blue eyes glittered with a youthful mirth he had never experienced as a child, his skin had wonderful even tan but what was more captivating was how young and fresh he looked, with the stress of Walkers almost obliterated and the pressing walls of the prison gone he actually seemed happy. He smiled a lot more an even laughed more often than not, it was a sound Carol adored. Daryl wasn't afraid of showing her how much he cared anymore, he'd often flip off any one who commented on their displays of affection, and he didn't mind the others seeing him shirtless. Rick already knew about the scars on his back and as uncomfortable as he had been the first time he was shirtless, the others had been pretty supportive, when they asked Daryl exactly how he got them the group made sure Carol was nearby to support him if need be.

The man Carol loved had changed so much in the past four years that it made her love him even more. Without the weight of Merle on his shoulders, Daryl had blossomed in to the man who'd been suppressed his entire life, he had become the man he wanted to. Daryl had been right when he thought he saw Merle as a Walker, the day the group left the prison Merle was at the gates, his eyes as cold and dead as usual but the skin on his neck was all chewed up. For a few minutes Daryl stood on the other side of the gate and stared at his brother, who even after dying, was still out to get him. Snapping and grabbing through the fence.

Daryl felt surprised when he felt very little emotion for the man. His brother had died a cruel death but he didn't really care, Merle had wished death on his little brother, whether he had lashed out or not didn't matter. Merle had been dead to him long before he reanimated, he would be forever thankful for Merle saving his life but that hD nothing on all the cruelty he put Daryl through.

Daryl didn't even flinch when he shot Merle in the skull as he stared him straight in the eyes. There was a tiny flicker of unknown emotion in Daryl's heart when Rick appeared at his side offering sympathy, but Daryl just shrugged it off and climbed in to the truck, leaving the body of his recently deceased brother staring up at the clouds. Almost like he was hallucinating. He'd grown used to it.

Daryl grinned as Glenn tossed the can towards him and listened to Daryl let out a groan of satisfaction when he sipped at it, chilled beer was a luxury Daryl had learned to savour and appreciate. Carol watched Glenn and Rick take two halves of the sandwiches she'd made and after a hearty thanks they moved away to the collapsible chairs a few feet away, her man on the other hand stood and wiped his filthy hands on his bare stomach and ran his fingers through his hair.

He was dirty. He was sweaty. He was unbelievably sexy. Carol watched Daryl head towards her with his beer in one hand. The unnatural limp in his gait did nothing to stop him from looking incredibly delicious, after Daryl's attack despite Hershel's best efforts, the man's dislocated knee had not set properly leaving him with a prominent aggressive limp. Daryl had adapted to the affliction pretty well, he couldn't run without aggravating the injury but these days, they didn't need to run that often any way.

"Hi." Daryl said as casually as possible after taking the tray from Carol's hands and placing it on the wall beside them, the dark oil over his skin framed those perfect eyes making them stand out at her.

"Hi." Carol replied as his fingers reached up to trace her jaw. "Glad you're enjoying the beer." She whispered as he stared at her completely transfixed, neither of the pair said another word for a couple of seconds as his eyes roamed her face like he was looking for something. He only broke his gaze to bring the beer to his lips and then went back to staring at her. "How's the bike doing?" Carol asked using her thumb to swipe away a smudge of oil that was uncomfortably close to his eye, Daryl had tried to fix that bike for over a year. After finally recovering from his attack back in the prison he checked it over, the guys had done a lot of damage to some of the most vital parts so Daryl had to scrounge old bikes left on the roads for bits he needed, he had been pretty happy when Glenn, Maggie and one of the new guys John had come back from a supply run with a bike. He didn't expect to find many working parts but managed to salvage and repair the piece he needed.

Daryl grinned at the thought of his bike up and running again. "Nearly done, got' few more bits t' connect, then jus' gotta fire it up." He took a moment to take another sip at his beer before nodding towards the sandwiches waiting for him on the wall. Carol smiled when he placed his beer on the tray and picked it up with one hand as he took her hand, weaving their fingers together gently as he pulled her towards the two other men and the rest of the group who joined their gathering.

The redneck man carefully sat down in one of the chairs placing the tray on the floor beside him and grabbed Carol's waist, yanking her on to his lap with a playful laugh as she squealed at his sudden entrapment. He shifted in the chair to find comfort as Carol sat on his legs and reached down for his food, Daryl smiled again his eyes twinkled in delight, she loved seeing him this way. So carefree. So happy.

Daryl had only managed to bite in to his sandwich when Sophia's voice rang out for his attention. "Uncle Daryl. Uncle Daryl!" She yelled running towards him and almost knocking over his beer, he pulled his arm from around Carol's face and took Sophia's hand as it landed on his knee. "Alex said I ain't tough." She said looking back accusingly at the boy who was slowly making his way to the group with his hands in the pockets of his cargoes. "I told him, Uncle Daryl said I'm tough 'cause I didn't cry when I fell over, but he kept laughin' sayin' I ain't tough!" She stopped her little rant when she realised Carol was laughing, Sophia pouted and frowned in irritation.

"Don't listen t' him, he don't know wha' I know 'bout ya. Next time he's mean ya jus' do what I showed ya." Daryl said winking at the little girl and ruffling her hair. "Then he'll know how tough ya really are." The little girl beamed mischievously as she glanced back at the teenager she was adamant was bullying her, he wasn't bullying her, he just like to annoy Sophia because there was no one around close to his age.

He was 16 going on 30. The teenager had seen so much in his life time that he'd become too mature for his age, Alex's eyes showed the harrowing pain and suffering he'd been through, and even though he never said a word to any body Carol almost knew his situation was similar to Daryl's childhood. Carol watched Alex sit down by her feet keeping his eyes on the group, he had strategically placed himself beside her so he could run if he felt threatened, but still seek Carol's comfort when he wanted it.

Carol wasn't sure why Alex had chosen her as an anchor but he hung on her every word, the boy with almost lifeless green eyes and no voice did every thing he could to please her, almost acting like a servant for her. But his attachment came at a price. For a long time Alex followed Carol around like a puppy and wouldn't leave her side, it wouldn't have been any bother if he didn't feel so threatened by Daryl. Every time Daryl approached Carol the boy would get in Daryl's way forcing distance between them, Carol would often wake up to find Daryl missing and Alex in his place.

It took some time for Alex to realise Daryl was not a threat to him or Carol and let him in, after a short period Alex and Daryl managed to adjust to each other, Daryl even took Alex hunting hoping to spur the mute boy's voice but nothing happened. Ever. The only sounds he made were occasional laughter and strange whimpering.

Carol reached down to the boy and ran her fingers through his hair, making him glance up wordlessly and smile. If the world had been a normal place and he had a voice this boy might actually be considered, good-looking. And for anyone who didn't know better, he could be considered Daryl's son. They looked so alike.

The only noticeable difference between them was their eye colour. they both had dark brown hair that grew wildly out of control, they both used actions to display their feelings instead of words and both men could glare so hard it sparked fear in Walkers.

"Think ya should work in t' kitchen more often," Daryl said disturbing her thoughts as Sophia ran around and jumped on Alex with a shriek and a giggle. "Make a mean sandwich, woman." He nuzzled in to the side of her neck and let his fingers snake up the back of her shirt.

Carol scoffed at his words but sighed at the feeling of his hand stopping between her shoulder blades as he kissed her skin. "You're a sexist pig sometimes." She replied grinning but not meaning a single word, Daryl liked to say these things to rile her up, he wasn't the kind of man who insisted his woman stayed in the kitchen at all.

"Mhmm..." Daryl mumbled placing his food back on the tray to grasp her chin and pull Carol close, his warm breath ghosting her lips as his eyes grew hard and serious. "No bra?" He whispered so nobody else could hear.

She smirked a little and leaned in to the man's ear, practically purring. "It'll just get in the way later." Things between the couple had changed recently thanks to a lot of self-healing, respect and heavy touching. It had taken nearly three years for the couple to get where they were today, Daryl was no longer afraid of sex and was nowhere near the same repressed person he once was. The man had discovered exactly what every other man discovers in his life, except it had taken a lot longer for the man to realise it.

Their first time had been the night they moved in to the house, Daryl had been a little nervous but all it took was a couple of kisses and a smile to calm him down. After that Daryl had been more open and made quite a few remarks, the difference between his behaviour now and before was astounding.

Daryl's confidence had multiplied tenfold and it benefited them both, Carol never really knew where his bravery suddenly came from, but Daryl knew. Merle's death. He didn't have to live in fear anymore and it was up lifting.

Carol smiled feeling Daryl bury his face in her arm almost like a child, the action muffled his voice as he agreed with her. For a moment Carol was overcome by a fever that had nothing to do with the weather, how could one man's words do that to her?

Ed had never made her feel the way Daryl did, even when their relationship was close to good. Daryl's rough southern drawl made chills run up her spine, his warm calloused hands left blazing trails on her skin and his eyes... those eyes. The shade and tone of his eyes were utterly incredible, his eyes showed his entire life story in just a second. They flashed every emotion and feeling he was capable of, which nowadays were more than before.

Carol's attention diverted from the shirtless man below her to the woman sitting herself on Glenn's lap. Maggie. She was without a doubt the most beautiful woman of the group, but also the maturest of the younger generation. She'd make a fine Mother. Carol smiled when Glenn reached over with a grin and placed his hand on the little swell, they hadn't intended to have a baby, but when the group decided to celebrate their new home with a small party... it just happened.

Daryl sighed as his head rested on Carol's arm, she looked down at him and wasn't surprised to find him staring at the couple longingly. That made her heart pang with guilt.

Carol ran her fingers through his hair to distract him. "Wish I could give ya that." He whispered quietly making Carol want to hold him close and kiss every thing better. She frowned a little in confusion and turned her body towards the man, draping an arm over his shoulder and using the other to brush his cheek feeling three long and thin scars on his face.

"You wish you could give me what?" Carol asked glancing between Maggie and Glenn back to the man so she could meet his eyes. "A baby?"

Daryl hesitated for a moment and bit his lip before shrugging. "Guess. A baby, happiness, a family. Somethin' like that." He took a deep breath and pulled his hand out from under her t-shirt so he could wrap his arms around her waist. "Kinda wish I had ma own kids now, so I can teach 'em shit 'n' show 'em not all Dixon's are bad." Carol could have smiled at Daryl's honesty if it wasn't for the fact it was such a sensitive issue, she knew a little about Daryl's new desire to have his own children. He'd created such a strong bond with Sophia and discovered he was actually good with children, when Maggie announced to the group she was expecting a baby she could see how he was happy for her but also a little jealous, he wanted to experience that joy. He wanted to know what it felt like to see his own child grow up, to see them smile and to see them stand up tall when something knocked them down.

They had been lying in bed one night and right as Carol was about to fall asleep he mentioned something Sophia had done that day, he asked if Carol's daughter ever did the same thing and he wondered out loud if he had a child, would they do the same thing. When the woman asked if he ever wanted children he told her in the past he never did, he didn't think he'd ever get the opportunity but now... now he wasn't so sure.

When they took Alex in Daryl would spend nights wondering what the teenager had been like as a child, what mischief he ever got up too. He asked what Sophia was like as a child and then he thought a little more on what his child would have been like. Carol just lay there watching him stare at the ceiling as he openly spoke about his feelings and thoughts like they were supposed to be shared, she felt bad for him when he pondered on what their family would be like if they had met at a younger age. Carol knew that was one of the major factors holding them back, in his early thirties Daryl was still reasonably young and if he found someone younger he could still have the children he wanted, but Carol she was just over fourty and her biological clock was getting slower. The older she got the harder it would be to conceive a child. But that wasn't the only worry she had, Carol had already lost one baby to this diabolical world, if she was to lose another it would destroy her completely. It would destroy Daryl too, it would be heartbreaking and soul-destroying for them both.

Carol looked down at Daryl and let his eyes tell her how he felt. "You have already given me so much," She said leaning down to kiss the man's sweaty forehead. "I don't need anything else from you we've got a family right here, we've got Alex, we've got each other. You know I'd do anything to make you happy but... a baby is... making a baby would be hard enough, I'm not as young as I used to be and I don't want to hit fifty before it's even double figures, having an old Momma isn't right."

Daryl sighed in defeat and nodded. "I know. Jus' wish I could'a had that stuff, wish things had been different wit' home and shit, every thing would'a been different." Carol nodded back and let her hands trail down his spine to the nearest scar just so she could exaggerate exactly what she meant all the while keeping their conversation hushed, the rest of the group were enjoying the sunshine and the freedom, they didn't need to know about their conversation.

"If things had been different maybe you'd have a wife and some lovely kids, maybe they'd be here and you'd be living in that empty house on the end of the street with them. But I'd be alone and we wouldn't exist, I would have given up without you. Sophia's gone and I had you to fall back on, if you'd grown up like a proper kid I would not of had you there for me." Carol saw the hurt and realisation flicker through his brilliant blue eyes making him hold her tighter and glance down at Alex as he lay in the grass with Sophia cuddled to his chest, they both appeared to be dozing.

After some thought Daryl turned back to the woman on his knee with his conclusion. "I'm sorry fer feelin' like this, I get it, I do 'n' I'll try to shake it. Want ya t' know I'd never leave ya fer someone else, ya 'portant t' me 'n' I'm gon'ta take care of ya, 'nd Alex. Gonna get tha' boy t' speak if it kills me. I'll make ya happy."

For a moment Carol didn't know whether to laugh with joy or burst in to tears at his honesty, a few years ago he never would have spoken so softly and so freely, he never would have considered sharing his dreams for a family. He probably wouldn't have dreamed about having a family. So she rewarded him the best way she knew how. A kiss.

As soon as Carol's lips met Daryl's she could feel him smiling, not smirking, smiling. She pressed her lips firmly against his just to show how much she appreciated his understand, Carol wove her fingers deep in to his hair and tugged ever so slightly as he heart raced. She could almost feel Daryl's heart beating in reply to hers as he dragged her closer, their chests pressed together as Daryl tightened his arms around the woman he loved.

The kiss was something she would remember for a long time, the feeling of his slightly dry but better feeling lips. The grazing of his lips sparked feelings in her heart she adored, a single touch from his calloused hands made her stomach flip every time. When his lips curled up in to a smile it sealed the deal.

Daryl let one hand release Carol's body to flip off whoever wolf whistled at them, then let the same hand reach up to grasp the back of her neck. He could feel his heart pounding and now knew it wasn't a heart attack, his body reacted to Carol in a way that he'd never experienced before being with her. Daryl's heart rate would multiply because he was excited not because he was scared of the impending fist that was going to collide with his face, or the foot that was about to connect with his stomach.

Daryl tried to banish the thought from his mind and just enjoy Carol's tender lips pressed against his and enjoy her company, but as soon as the thought of his father appeared in his mind it was too much. He sharply pulled away from Carol and flinched a bit, he never could get rid of his father's image when he made an appearance. Daryl had managed to curb the amount of times his father took control of his mind, but he still couldn't eradicate him.

Carol seemed to recognise what was going on and gently ran her fingers through his hair, his eye flicked to hers and for just a few seconds he looked afraid but then he forced it aside and smiled. Daryl brushed his fingers across his girl's cheekbones to wordlessly thank her for everything she'd ever done for him.

For holding him in the night when he sobbed, helping him stay grounded when he needed her, Carol had been their for Daryl through thick and thin. She was there when he didn't want anyone around, she was there when he needed her around and he could never thank her enough for that. Carol and Daryl both looked towards Rick as he began to address the group, the man was talking about when they could go on another supply run, he never relaxed.

"Daddy?" Sophia mumbled slightly shifting on Alex's chest as she tangled her fingers in his pockets. "Its Alex's birthday tomorrow, are we having another party?"

Carol instantly frowned and glanced down at the two, how did Sophia know it was Alex's birthday, he never spoke to anyone and Sophia was only just learning to read so he didn't write it down for her. Daryl shuffled Carol on his lap so he could peer over the arm of the chair down at Sophia, almost as if she sensed him the girl looked up and beamed. "Sophia, darlin, how'd ya know it's his birthday tomorra? Did Alex talk t' ya?"

Daryl's breath caught a little when Sophia nodded and gave a reply. "We talk lots, Alex tells me 'bout his Mommy going to Heaven like my Mommy, he said his Daddy left him at his Uncle's house for a sleep over. Alex had a really long sleepover at his Uncle's house but his Uncle started being mean so-"

"-Shut... up!" An unknown voice practically squeaked. It was strained and dropped out in places, sounding like it hurt its owner every time it was used. Carol could have cried when she look down at Alex and found him with his arms wrapped tightly around his legs, he was staring at Sophia like she had done something wrong, maybe she wasn't supposed to tell anybody Alex could talk. They spent five months thinking he was completely mute.

Alex wrapped a hand around his throat gently to try to ease the burning pain as he spoke again. "Soph... not suppose... tell." He whispered hoarsely, wincing after every word.

Carol heard Rick make an excuse for the rest of the group, inspiring them all to get to their feet and make their way to another cosy spot, giving the young family a chance to talk about the latest development. For a moment every body stayed where they were and made no sound, until Alex looked up at his anchor and her boyfriend. "Mad?" He croaked hoping they would both understand.

Carol was surprised slightly when Daryl asked her to take his plates back to the house, he wanted to talk to Alex, man-to-man. After a quick peck to Daryl's lips she scooted away towards the door, giving Daryl chance to grab another chair and plant it in front of his. "Sit." Daryl instructed the young man trying to use a soft tone, hesitantly Alex stood and dropped himself in to the chair.

"Sorry. You... mad."

Daryl gently shook his head and let his eyes connect to the boys. "We ain't mad, sounds like ya got good reason t' keep shut. Does it hurt when ya talk?" The man watched the boy he lived with nod. "What happened?" He asked but he suddenly remembered what Sophia said about his Uncle. "Did he do tha t' ya?"

Just the thought of someone hurting such an incredibly generous and loving young man made Daryl's blood boil. Daryl knew some of the things he had physically and mentally been through, but he could only imagine what had Alex must have suffered to lose most of his voice. When Alex nodded Daryl could have killed somebody, he felt rage flood his veins when the young man stared at the floor. "Doctor... fix it... but Walkers... too late... never have a real voice."

Daryl took a few seconds to piece together exactly what the boy was saying. He was going to have surgery or something to fix his voice before the world ended but then the Walkers hit, so it never happened. "I'm sorry ya have trouble, but it don't mean nothin', if ya wanna talk ya can 'nd if ya don't wanna then don't. Ain't gon' force ya." There was a silent moment as Alex linked his fingers together and then unwound them again, Daryl watched the boy quietly as the redneck ran his fingers through his hair. "You ain't got' nothin' t' worry 'bout 'round here, we can take care of ya. Nobody gon' hurt ya."

Alex carried on staring at the floor as he spoke again. "Tryin'...not...be...freak." He whispered as his fingers traced a couple of scars on the under sides of his arm. The happy relatively gentle mood of the day seemed to have evaporated and took a darker tone, the hot sun did nothing to lift it.

"Think cause ya got coupl'a scars, yer a freak?" Daryl replied leaning forward to take the boy's hand and distract him from the scars, originally Alex would never let Daryl touch him but now he was pretty laid back and relaxed about it. "I got plenty'a scars 'nd not jus' the ones ya see, yer a good kid 'nd ya will see it 'ventually. Don't be hard on Sophia fer tellin' us, she jus' wanted t' celebrate yer birthday."

Alex nodded and felt Daryl squeeze his hand, the boy manipulated his fingers so he could grip Daryl's hand and stop himself from feeling so lost. "Can...go fishin'... tomorrow?" Alex asked suddenly making Daryl smirk just a little, they had found a couple of old fishing kits on a supply run once and saw Alex eyeing them up, but he never asked to use them or showed any inclination on knowing how to use the gear.

"Sure. Gotta go on watch fer coupl'a hours in the mornin' but after tha we can go." Daryl replied seeing the young man beam with proper happiness for the first time since he joined the group. "First, how 'bout we go back t' the house, could use a shower 'nd another beer. If Carol ain't lookin' I'll sneak ya one out." He said grinning with a cheeky wink as both males stood and headed back for the house.

Carol was stood at the door waiting for them, she watched Daryl limp towards the door with his arm slung around Alex's shoulder. That man could have been a great Father, he was going to make a wonderful Father for Alex.

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**OK so this is the end of Dreamer's mist and for those of you who think I may have stopped in a random place, its because I have. The idea of this is to show how Daryl has developed as a person and has healed but he's not entirely complete yet, if I had ended the story at the end of Daryl's life as an old man or something, it would have felt right. The end of an old man's life is where he'd look back and say this is what I'm proud of like kids etc, obviously our Daryl hasn't got that yet. Who knows what is on the cards for him. **

**With Daryl out of his shell obviously Carol follows and takes him as an example, although she doesn't play a major role in the final chapter, the ending also signifies how far she had come and still has to go. She can't live without Daryl but at the same time she knows she had to curb the need to be around him constantly, Carol has the rest of her life to learn how to do that. **

**An Alex of course. He is a tool thrown in to their lives that will help the couple come together by helping him, but at the same time challenge them because he is not their child, the boy is a disturbed teenager who needs a shoulder to cry on. The ending for him almost brings us full circle to the beginning, where we are presented with a character who has a violent history and is in need of some affection, you can imagine Alex as a mini Daryl except he had two parental like figures to help him through a difficult time.**

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So I want to thank everyone for reviewing and giving me some incredible feedback, because believe it or not I actually got over 7,000 visitors for DM and only nigh on 100 reviews. But I'm not going to wallow. I also received my first fan mail so thanks for that Lphipps21, your message made my day.

I don't know what I'm going to do with Daryl and Carol after this, I have a few ideas in the pipeline but nothing concrete just yet. Here's to finding the magic spark I need.


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